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| George Osborne lovebombs feral MPs as Bank hearing veers off topic | George Osborne lovebombs feral MPs as Bank hearing veers off topic |
| (34 minutes later) | |
| The exact details of the government’s proposed Bank of England bill are still somewhat hazy, even to members of the Treasury select committee, though it does appear to involve the governor of the Bank being required to write a letter to himself every now and again to reassure himself that he is independent in mind and body. Given that every time Mark Carney opens his mouth he sounds like someone on long-term medication to recover from a misspent youth swallowing industrial quantities of barbiturates, this could just be a medical requirement to make sure he is still who he thinks he is. | The exact details of the government’s proposed Bank of England bill are still somewhat hazy, even to members of the Treasury select committee, though it does appear to involve the governor of the Bank being required to write a letter to himself every now and again to reassure himself that he is independent in mind and body. Given that every time Mark Carney opens his mouth he sounds like someone on long-term medication to recover from a misspent youth swallowing industrial quantities of barbiturates, this could just be a medical requirement to make sure he is still who he thinks he is. |
| Just how successfully Carney’s occupational therapy is going is one for his team of shrinks. But to the outsider it looks increasingly as though the governor thinks his main purpose is to do as little as possible to rock whatever boat he happens to be on. Certainly George Osborne was delighted that Carney’s views on his own and the bank’s independence of thought had exactly mirrored his own at a dinner the previous evening at which the governor had bigged up the importance of Britain remaining in the EU. | Just how successfully Carney’s occupational therapy is going is one for his team of shrinks. But to the outsider it looks increasingly as though the governor thinks his main purpose is to do as little as possible to rock whatever boat he happens to be on. Certainly George Osborne was delighted that Carney’s views on his own and the bank’s independence of thought had exactly mirrored his own at a dinner the previous evening at which the governor had bigged up the importance of Britain remaining in the EU. |
| Labour’s Wes Streeting had been just as thrilled by Carney’s endorsement of the EU, and the chancellor was quick to express his pleasure at the new era of cross-party politics. “I hope that’s how things are going to be done in this parliament,” Osborne said in his most charming voice. | |
| “Save the lovebombing,” Streeting replied, before asking the chancellor to provide more details of what exactly he was trying to achieve in his renegotiations with his EU partners. “Oh, you, know, this and that,” George shrugged by way of reply, trying to infer he was being diplomatically cagey rather than short of ideas. | |
| Strictly speaking, all this EU chat was off topic as the committee was supposed to be asking the chancellor about the Bank of England bill, but Andrew Tyrie, the committee’s chair, is just as susceptible to boredom as any other mortal and was happy to let the committee go feral. At which point, Labour’s Helen Goodman brought up the subject of tax credit cuts. In particular, why the chancellor hadn’t provided the exact breakdown of their impact in the first year, which he had promised to provide the last time he appeared before the committee. | Strictly speaking, all this EU chat was off topic as the committee was supposed to be asking the chancellor about the Bank of England bill, but Andrew Tyrie, the committee’s chair, is just as susceptible to boredom as any other mortal and was happy to let the committee go feral. At which point, Labour’s Helen Goodman brought up the subject of tax credit cuts. In particular, why the chancellor hadn’t provided the exact breakdown of their impact in the first year, which he had promised to provide the last time he appeared before the committee. |
| “I’ve given the committee a great deal of information,” George said. Though none of it helpful. “I’ve sent the chairman lots of quintiles.” The rest of the committee nodded earnestly, trying to make it look as if they knew what a quintile was, but Tyrie was unimpressed. “I asked for deciles,” he pointed out. | “I’ve given the committee a great deal of information,” George said. Though none of it helpful. “I’ve sent the chairman lots of quintiles.” The rest of the committee nodded earnestly, trying to make it look as if they knew what a quintile was, but Tyrie was unimpressed. “I asked for deciles,” he pointed out. |
| There was a time in the last parliament when Osborne might have been intimidated by Tyrie’s precision, but George now feels untouchable. He is blessed, the Sun King in waiting. Tyrie could whistle for his deciles. Whatever they were. “This is fundamentally a judgment call,” he observed, “and I’m comfortable with the judgment call that I have made.” The committee could moan all it liked, but tax credit cuts were coming in regardless. | There was a time in the last parliament when Osborne might have been intimidated by Tyrie’s precision, but George now feels untouchable. He is blessed, the Sun King in waiting. Tyrie could whistle for his deciles. Whatever they were. “This is fundamentally a judgment call,” he observed, “and I’m comfortable with the judgment call that I have made.” The committee could moan all it liked, but tax credit cuts were coming in regardless. |
| The chancellor is now so comfortable in his own skin – not to mention, brilliance – that not even John Mann, Labour’s not-so-tame committee rottweiler, can lay a glove on him. What’s more, Mann knows it and fluffed his lines from the off. “As Rudolph Churchill once pointed out …” he began. There was an embarrassed silence before Tyrie helpfully suggested that perhaps he had meant Randolph Churchill. “Rudolph could have been a long-lost cousin,” George joked, delighted to dig Mann into an even deeper hole. | |
| Mann tried to regain his composure by visualising Streeting and Osborne as “comrades in arms waving the EU flag together in Whitehall”. This was too much for the Tory Eurosceptic Jacob Rees-Mogg, whose cough broke out into a choking fit. Osborne briefly considered passing Rees-Mogg a glass of water before thinking better of it. Compassionate Conservatism does have its limits. | Mann tried to regain his composure by visualising Streeting and Osborne as “comrades in arms waving the EU flag together in Whitehall”. This was too much for the Tory Eurosceptic Jacob Rees-Mogg, whose cough broke out into a choking fit. Osborne briefly considered passing Rees-Mogg a glass of water before thinking better of it. Compassionate Conservatism does have its limits. |