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Why I turned down the chance to be the next MP on I'm a Celebrity Why I turned down the chance to be the next MP on I'm a Celebrity
(35 minutes later)
On 12 September, Jeremy Corbyn was announced as the new leader of the Labour party. Sat in the audience awaiting the leadership announcement at the Queen Elizabeth II conference centre, I submitted my resignation from the Labour front bench. I then posted my resignation letter, including the reasons for my decision, on Twitter. On 12 September, Jeremy Corbyn was announced as the new leader of the Labour party. Sat in the audience awaiting the leadership announcement at the Queen Elizabeth II conference centre, I submitted my resignation from the Labour frontbench. I then posted my resignation letter, including the reasons for my decision, on Twitter.
There was a mixed response to my letter, by email and on social media, but those people who didn’t like – and who refused to understand – my decision sent an awful lot of splenetic, foam-flecked Twitter traffic my way: the “new politics” in action.There was a mixed response to my letter, by email and on social media, but those people who didn’t like – and who refused to understand – my decision sent an awful lot of splenetic, foam-flecked Twitter traffic my way: the “new politics” in action.
Related: I'm a Celebrity attempts to lure anti-Corbyn MPs into jungleRelated: I'm a Celebrity attempts to lure anti-Corbyn MPs into jungle
Three days later, sitting in my Westminster office, surveying the post-apocalyptic landscape and reflecting upon the zombie-like behaviour of my new Twitter admirers an unusual email flashed upon my screen. Three days later, sitting in my Westminster office, surveying the post-apocalyptic landscape and reflecting upon the zombie-like behaviour of my new Twitter admirers, an unusual email flashed upon my screen.
I am writing to see if you would be willing to meet with senior producers to discuss the next series of I’m a Celebrity … Get Me Out Of Here!I am writing to see if you would be willing to meet with senior producers to discuss the next series of I’m a Celebrity … Get Me Out Of Here!
My Westminster office is staffed by the extraordinarily industrious duo of Ben Miller and Rosie Corrigan. My emails flash up on their screens too. The keyboard clatter of the office stopped instantly. An ashen-faced Ben barked: “Don’t even think about it.”My Westminster office is staffed by the extraordinarily industrious duo of Ben Miller and Rosie Corrigan. My emails flash up on their screens too. The keyboard clatter of the office stopped instantly. An ashen-faced Ben barked: “Don’t even think about it.”
Rosie, the UK’s youngest-ever female mayor, shot me a withering, flint-eyed look. I laughed out loud.Rosie, the UK’s youngest-ever female mayor, shot me a withering, flint-eyed look. I laughed out loud.
The email continued:The email continued:
It goes without saying that there is enormous affection and respect for you among the viewing public and I think you could do really well in the show – you are honest, quick-witted and a down-to-earth individual… It goes without saying that there is enormous affection and respect for you among the viewing public and I think you could do really well in the show – you are honest, quick-witted and a down-to-earth individual …
Agreeing entirely with the sentiment, my immediate thoughts were about my constituency: nothing is more important to me in politics than fighting for the interests of Copeland. I imagine this would be hard to do in the Australian jungle.Agreeing entirely with the sentiment, my immediate thoughts were about my constituency: nothing is more important to me in politics than fighting for the interests of Copeland. I imagine this would be hard to do in the Australian jungle.
I briefly considered the complications that would ensue from a vegetarian type-1 diabetic entering the camp. “I’m not eating that, you’ll all have to starve” and “Where’s the fridge for my insulin?” Catchphrases capable of sweeping the nation, but just imagine the tension as “fear and loathing in the outback” took hold. I briefly considered the complications that would ensue from a vegetarian, type-1 diabetic entering the camp. “I’m not eating that, you’ll all have to starve” and “Where’s the fridge for my insulin?” Catchphrases capable of sweeping the nation, but just imagine the tension as “fear and loathing in the outback” took hold.
Filled with white terror, my mind drifted to thoughts of the furious far-left organising to torture me night after night on national TV. As they organised phone banks to keep me in the show, they’d happily make common cause with the evil capitalist fat cats who devised such a devilish and compelling television format and whose coffers they would happily swell if it meant that a Labour MP was forced to eat witchetty grubs and worse.Filled with white terror, my mind drifted to thoughts of the furious far-left organising to torture me night after night on national TV. As they organised phone banks to keep me in the show, they’d happily make common cause with the evil capitalist fat cats who devised such a devilish and compelling television format and whose coffers they would happily swell if it meant that a Labour MP was forced to eat witchetty grubs and worse.
Ultimately though, I’m a politician, not a celebrity – and I don’t want to be one. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not puritanical with regard to the awkward interface between politicians and celebrities. Jamie Oliver is using his celebrity to great effect to make a political difference; Brian May signed my guitar in parliament. Then there’s Geldof, Bono, Charlton Heston - the list is endless (though it’s not all good). Ultimately though, I’m a politician, not a celebrity – and I don’t want to be one. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not puritanical with regard to the awkward interface between politicians and celebrities. Jamie Oliver is using his celebrity to great effect to make a political difference; Brian May signed my guitar in parliament. Then there’s Geldof, Bono, Charlton Heston – the list is endless (though it’s not all good).
So a bit of Celebrity and Strictly is fine for those who want to do it (and a nice earner too, I expect). Assuming other MPs do accept an offer to join the jungle camp, good luck to them. If Michael Ashcroft and Isabel Oakeshott are right, David Cameron has a natural skill set with which to adequately handle the challenges of the jungle.So a bit of Celebrity and Strictly is fine for those who want to do it (and a nice earner too, I expect). Assuming other MPs do accept an offer to join the jungle camp, good luck to them. If Michael Ashcroft and Isabel Oakeshott are right, David Cameron has a natural skill set with which to adequately handle the challenges of the jungle.
My advice to other politicians potentially considering the invitation is as follows: if you’re a Labour MP, make sure you haven’t recently upset the Walking Dead. If you’re a Tory MP, make sure you didn’t vote to rob millions of British families from their tax credits. If you’re a Liberal Democrat MP, go for it, you’ve nothing to lose. My advice to other politicians potentially considering the invitation is as follows: if you’re a Labour MP, make sure you haven’t recently upset the Walking Dead. If you’re a Tory MP, make sure you didn’t vote to rob millions of British families of their tax credits. If you’re a Liberal Democrat MP, go for it, you’ve nothing to lose.
Me? I’m not a celebrity, I’m not going in there and I’ve politely declined to meet the producers of the show. Copeland is set to become one of the fastest-growing parts of the UK economy, there’s a lot of work to be done and if you really want to see me in late November and early December, I’ll be holding my usual surgeries – but please remember, planning issues are a matter for the council.Me? I’m not a celebrity, I’m not going in there and I’ve politely declined to meet the producers of the show. Copeland is set to become one of the fastest-growing parts of the UK economy, there’s a lot of work to be done and if you really want to see me in late November and early December, I’ll be holding my usual surgeries – but please remember, planning issues are a matter for the council.