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| Shoreditch spies: why does GCHQ want to hire hipsters? | Shoreditch spies: why does GCHQ want to hire hipsters? |
| (about 3 hours later) | |
| David Cameron’s response to the Paris attacks was swift. At the G20 summit in Turkey he previewed the forthcoming defence and security review, which will promise to recruit 1,900 more intelligence officers for MI5, MI6 and GCHQ. Easier said than done, however. Because these days hiring spies is maybe the hardest part of spying. | David Cameron’s response to the Paris attacks was swift. At the G20 summit in Turkey he previewed the forthcoming defence and security review, which will promise to recruit 1,900 more intelligence officers for MI5, MI6 and GCHQ. Easier said than done, however. Because these days hiring spies is maybe the hardest part of spying. |
| Indeed at GCHQ, which monitors enemy communications and protects British data, the recruitment drive was already underway. Since last Monday the streets of Britain have been sprayed with a cryptic message: “GCH-Who? Technical Opportunities gchq-careers.co.uk”. The words appeared on pavements in Manchester, Birmingham, Leeds, Wolverhampton and Shoreditch – not sprayed in paint, but washed out of the street’s own grime with a stencil and a pressure hose. | Indeed at GCHQ, which monitors enemy communications and protects British data, the recruitment drive was already underway. Since last Monday the streets of Britain have been sprayed with a cryptic message: “GCH-Who? Technical Opportunities gchq-careers.co.uk”. The words appeared on pavements in Manchester, Birmingham, Leeds, Wolverhampton and Shoreditch – not sprayed in paint, but washed out of the street’s own grime with a stencil and a pressure hose. |
| The choice of Shoreditch was especially interesting. This part of east London, in the unlikely event that you hadn’t heard, is home to Silicon Roundabout, the country’s biggest cluster of of tech startups. It also is (or was) the epicentre of UK hipsterism, and it shows what the intelligence agencies are up against – not just bad guys, but cooler employers. | The choice of Shoreditch was especially interesting. This part of east London, in the unlikely event that you hadn’t heard, is home to Silicon Roundabout, the country’s biggest cluster of of tech startups. It also is (or was) the epicentre of UK hipsterism, and it shows what the intelligence agencies are up against – not just bad guys, but cooler employers. |
| There is something apt about spies advertising with a message that eventually self-destructs | There is something apt about spies advertising with a message that eventually self-destructs |
| Spies have to be clever, remember. Very clever. A great deal of them need to be highly trained in computing or mathematics. As GCHQ’s own website says, “Our technical specialists work with – and often develop – unique, highly advanced technologies. Our analysts piece together complex data and produce insightful reports.” Finding such skilled staff is a problem in many industries, but for GCHQ it is a nightmare. They do their work in secret, for one thing, so people hear very little about it. Nor can they recruit abroad, as a school or a hospital might, because even a nice foreigner rather undermines the idea of “national” security. | Spies have to be clever, remember. Very clever. A great deal of them need to be highly trained in computing or mathematics. As GCHQ’s own website says, “Our technical specialists work with – and often develop – unique, highly advanced technologies. Our analysts piece together complex data and produce insightful reports.” Finding such skilled staff is a problem in many industries, but for GCHQ it is a nightmare. They do their work in secret, for one thing, so people hear very little about it. Nor can they recruit abroad, as a school or a hospital might, because even a nice foreigner rather undermines the idea of “national” security. |
| The problem has a further layer of irony because – to simplify for a moment – GCHQ actually invented computers. The Colossus machines that Alan Turing and Tommy Flowers built at Bletchley Park during the war have turned into an industry that absorbs the people who might be Turing’s and Flowers’s successors. | The problem has a further layer of irony because – to simplify for a moment – GCHQ actually invented computers. The Colossus machines that Alan Turing and Tommy Flowers built at Bletchley Park during the war have turned into an industry that absorbs the people who might be Turing’s and Flowers’s successors. |
| There’s some glamour in being a spy, admittedly, but you can’t show off about it. It’s a steady job on decent pay, but it won’t make you the next Zuckerberg. You also have to work in Cheltenham, probably, or perhaps Bude, Harrogate or Scarborough – nice places, to be sure, but perhaps still too “undiscovered” even for hipsters. Doing good is probably the main appeal of spying, but then not everybody wants to feel that their day at the office might one day fail to stop a terrorist attack. | There’s some glamour in being a spy, admittedly, but you can’t show off about it. It’s a steady job on decent pay, but it won’t make you the next Zuckerberg. You also have to work in Cheltenham, probably, or perhaps Bude, Harrogate or Scarborough – nice places, to be sure, but perhaps still too “undiscovered” even for hipsters. Doing good is probably the main appeal of spying, but then not everybody wants to feel that their day at the office might one day fail to stop a terrorist attack. |
| Pressure wash stencilling is far from a new advertising tool these days. Indeed, someone else is doing it in Shoreditch, too, to promote “12 Weeks of Techno”. It seems a bit of a stretch for GCHQ to be talking like a night club – the ads were reportedly the idea of its recruitment agency, Penna – but they clearly feel the need to put some excitement into the idea of government surveillance. In the past, they’ve published special puzzles that only those with the right skills could decode. And there is at least something apt this time about spies advertising with a message that eventually self-destructs. | Pressure wash stencilling is far from a new advertising tool these days. Indeed, someone else is doing it in Shoreditch, too, to promote “12 Weeks of Techno”. It seems a bit of a stretch for GCHQ to be talking like a night club – the ads were reportedly the idea of its recruitment agency, Penna – but they clearly feel the need to put some excitement into the idea of government surveillance. In the past, they’ve published special puzzles that only those with the right skills could decode. And there is at least something apt this time about spies advertising with a message that eventually self-destructs. |
| GCHQ’s official line is that they are “always looking to widen our recruitment focus to reach the people we would like to recruit and therefore we use a range of innovative channels for our advertising.” They won’t talk to me about why they’re after hipsters, though. They won’t even talk about why they won’t talk. | GCHQ’s official line is that they are “always looking to widen our recruitment focus to reach the people we would like to recruit and therefore we use a range of innovative channels for our advertising.” They won’t talk to me about why they’re after hipsters, though. They won’t even talk about why they won’t talk. |
| “They look pretty cool,” says Alex, looking at the ads. She is 32, dressed in a smart grey coat and smoking a cigarette. She works with computers at a local interior design firm. Would she consider working for GCHQ then? “I probably wouldn’t.” Why not? “Firstly I haven’t heard of them. And at the moment, because I love interior design and architecture I would stay where I am.” It is, we agree, a big leap from interior design to counter-terrorism. “I suppose it would be quite interesting though, a bit of spy work. I’m a big fan of James Bond so, maybe.” One other thing: the main office is in Cheltenham. “Oh for God’s sake! I live in Angel. No, I’m not going to bugger off to Cheltenham. Sorry.” How about Harrogate? Scarborough? Bude? “I like Angel. Angel’s very glitzy and great and fantastic.” | |
| The next person I speak to is Jake, 35, who other than being clean-shaven looks in his blue suit every inch the dapper hipster gent. He’s noticed the ads too. Does he have any technical skills that might transfer to spying? “God no. I’m an actor.” More enthusiastic is Paul, also 35. He works in an ad agency but sounds like he would jump at the chance to join GCHQ instead. “I think it would be quite interesting, a bit more than a normal nine-to-five job,” he says. “I wouldn’t have thought I’d be suitably qualified, though.” | The next person I speak to is Jake, 35, who other than being clean-shaven looks in his blue suit every inch the dapper hipster gent. He’s noticed the ads too. Does he have any technical skills that might transfer to spying? “God no. I’m an actor.” More enthusiastic is Paul, also 35. He works in an ad agency but sounds like he would jump at the chance to join GCHQ instead. “I think it would be quite interesting, a bit more than a normal nine-to-five job,” he says. “I wouldn’t have thought I’d be suitably qualified, though.” |
| Finally Nick comes along. He’s 28, a programmer, dressed well but not showily, bang in the centre of the target audience. He doesn’t know what the ads are about, and when I tell him, he isn’t grabbed immediately. “I prefer more creative than destructive things,” he says. “I know that to protect against [cyber-terrorism] you need to be a hacker to start with, maybe, then go white-hat as opposed to black-hat. My skill set isn’t good enough for that. I don’t really know what it takes to be an anti-hacker. I think I would need some training. I would probably [understand], because I love that kind of thing. I love security, and we do quite a lot in my company.” | Finally Nick comes along. He’s 28, a programmer, dressed well but not showily, bang in the centre of the target audience. He doesn’t know what the ads are about, and when I tell him, he isn’t grabbed immediately. “I prefer more creative than destructive things,” he says. “I know that to protect against [cyber-terrorism] you need to be a hacker to start with, maybe, then go white-hat as opposed to black-hat. My skill set isn’t good enough for that. I don’t really know what it takes to be an anti-hacker. I think I would need some training. I would probably [understand], because I love that kind of thing. I love security, and we do quite a lot in my company.” |
| Related: Moscow embraces 'hipster Stalinism' | Related: Moscow embraces 'hipster Stalinism' |
| It sounds like he is talking himself around. So would he consider it? “There’s no reason that I wouldn’t. Every time I watch MI5 or James Bond I always think it’s a glamorous thing to do, but I don’t ever consider it as a job. It’s more like a movie thing. I think I would definitely consider it if I met someone who did it. Or maybe if there was someone public who was outspoken about it, who was in my role, and it wasn’t all secretive and hidden.” Finally, the killer question. Would he move to one of the GCHQ locations? “Eventually I will move out, and those places sound lovely … Right now, I love London though.” | It sounds like he is talking himself around. So would he consider it? “There’s no reason that I wouldn’t. Every time I watch MI5 or James Bond I always think it’s a glamorous thing to do, but I don’t ever consider it as a job. It’s more like a movie thing. I think I would definitely consider it if I met someone who did it. Or maybe if there was someone public who was outspoken about it, who was in my role, and it wasn’t all secretive and hidden.” Finally, the killer question. Would he move to one of the GCHQ locations? “Eventually I will move out, and those places sound lovely … Right now, I love London though.” |
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