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'Everymike' doesn't let the facts get in the way of his leave argument 'Everymike' doesn't let the facts get in the way of his leave argument
(3 months later)
Short straw or shorter straw. Vote Leave chose the short straw. Michael Gove might not be a politician to whom people instinctively warm – or even recognise – but he’s less of a liability on live television than Boris Johnson, who could torpedo the whole campaign with one ill-judged gag. So Johnson was padlocked up for the evening and Gove was let out to see if he could handle the Sky grilling any better than the prime minister had the night before. For a man with almost no previous experience of having to think on his feet in front of the cameras, it would be a tough gig.Short straw or shorter straw. Vote Leave chose the short straw. Michael Gove might not be a politician to whom people instinctively warm – or even recognise – but he’s less of a liability on live television than Boris Johnson, who could torpedo the whole campaign with one ill-judged gag. So Johnson was padlocked up for the evening and Gove was let out to see if he could handle the Sky grilling any better than the prime minister had the night before. For a man with almost no previous experience of having to think on his feet in front of the cameras, it would be a tough gig.
Maybe the novelty had worn off or maybe people had better things to do, but the spin room at Sky’s headquarters in west London was a great deal less manic than it had been for Dave. There was a rare sighting of Labour’s Kate Hoey. “I’m not sure what she’s doing here,” said a Vote Leave campaign manager. “We were trying to keep her out of sight.”Maybe the novelty had worn off or maybe people had better things to do, but the spin room at Sky’s headquarters in west London was a great deal less manic than it had been for Dave. There was a rare sighting of Labour’s Kate Hoey. “I’m not sure what she’s doing here,” said a Vote Leave campaign manager. “We were trying to keep her out of sight.”
Related: EU referendum: Michael Gove questioned on Sky News - live
For all Hoey’s Brexit enthusiasm, she’s seen as a potential vote loser. As would the Northern Ireland secretary, Theresa Villiers, who was also being allowed a rare outing, if anyone had any idea who she was. With Douglas Carswell also lurking in the background, it felt very much like a B-list event.For all Hoey’s Brexit enthusiasm, she’s seen as a potential vote loser. As would the Northern Ireland secretary, Theresa Villiers, who was also being allowed a rare outing, if anyone had any idea who she was. With Douglas Carswell also lurking in the background, it felt very much like a B-list event.
Even so, the B-listers were doing their best to talk up their man in the pre-match warm-up. “As long as he sticks to three or four facts, he’ll be fine,” said one. Gove, though, had a different plan. He was going to make the case on the basis of no facts whatsoever. Try not to think of me as the lord chancellor, he pleaded. Try not to think of me as the justice secretary. Whatever you do, don’t think of me as a member of the government. Just think of me as Every Mike. An ordinary bloke who just happened to be part of the establishment.Even so, the B-listers were doing their best to talk up their man in the pre-match warm-up. “As long as he sticks to three or four facts, he’ll be fine,” said one. Gove, though, had a different plan. He was going to make the case on the basis of no facts whatsoever. Try not to think of me as the lord chancellor, he pleaded. Try not to think of me as the justice secretary. Whatever you do, don’t think of me as a member of the government. Just think of me as Every Mike. An ordinary bloke who just happened to be part of the establishment.
“Can you name me any economic organisations that say Britain would be better off outside the EU?” Faisal Islam began, hell-bent on being just as combative as the night before. Everymike was proud to say that absolutely no one agreed with him, because he, Everymike and Everyboris were right and everyone else in the world was wrong. Everymike was just as keen to say that every country in the entire world had our worst interests at heart. “People would be better off if they trusted the leaders of this country,” he snapped. Presumably he doesn’t think the prime minister, the chancellor, the home secretary and the foreign secretary are leaders of this country.“Can you name me any economic organisations that say Britain would be better off outside the EU?” Faisal Islam began, hell-bent on being just as combative as the night before. Everymike was proud to say that absolutely no one agreed with him, because he, Everymike and Everyboris were right and everyone else in the world was wrong. Everymike was just as keen to say that every country in the entire world had our worst interests at heart. “People would be better off if they trusted the leaders of this country,” he snapped. Presumably he doesn’t think the prime minister, the chancellor, the home secretary and the foreign secretary are leaders of this country.
Things got even tetchier when Islam pointed out that even Ukip did not trust Everymike’s own financial figures and the tail-end of their exchanges became distinctly ugly. Everymike was still looking a bit hot and bothered after the ad break, when members of the audience got to have their say. And they all appeared rather sceptical of Everymike’s Everymikeness. They didn’t trust his figures and they didn’t appear to trust him.Things got even tetchier when Islam pointed out that even Ukip did not trust Everymike’s own financial figures and the tail-end of their exchanges became distinctly ugly. Everymike was still looking a bit hot and bothered after the ad break, when members of the audience got to have their say. And they all appeared rather sceptical of Everymike’s Everymikeness. They didn’t trust his figures and they didn’t appear to trust him.
Even so, while Everymike was just being Angry Everymike, appealing to nostalgic visions of Albion, he was doing OK. Not well, not badly. Then he blew it. When a woman asked about her French home, Everymike tried to be charming. “I’ve got some friends in France,” he said ingratiatingly. The rest of the audience recoiled, suddenly aware that if Vote Leave was to win, then Everymike would be in the running for the prime minister’s job and they would be subjected to much, much more of Bedside Manner Everymike. Realising he had blundered badly, Everymike tried to salvage the situation. “Whatever you do, don’t put posters of me on your bedroom wall,” he pleaded. Too late. What had been thought could not be unthought.Even so, while Everymike was just being Angry Everymike, appealing to nostalgic visions of Albion, he was doing OK. Not well, not badly. Then he blew it. When a woman asked about her French home, Everymike tried to be charming. “I’ve got some friends in France,” he said ingratiatingly. The rest of the audience recoiled, suddenly aware that if Vote Leave was to win, then Everymike would be in the running for the prime minister’s job and they would be subjected to much, much more of Bedside Manner Everymike. Realising he had blundered badly, Everymike tried to salvage the situation. “Whatever you do, don’t put posters of me on your bedroom wall,” he pleaded. Too late. What had been thought could not be unthought.