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Review: In Tracy Tynan’s Memoir, ‘Wear and Tear,’ Feeding on Explosive Drama Review: In Tracy Tynan’s Memoir, ‘Wear and Tear,’ Feeding on Explosive Drama
(35 minutes later)
You’re no one in this life — or in this afterlife, at any rate — until one of your children has written an account of what an appalling parent you were. You’re no one in this life — or in the afterlife, at any rate — until one of your children has written an account of what an appalling parent you were.
Three of these memoirs have stuck in my mind recently. In Alexandra Styron’s “Reading My Father” (2011), William Styron has a temper like pulling the pin on a grenade. In Andre Dubus III’s “Townie” (2011), his father, Andre Dubus, loves the Boston Red Sox but never takes his son to a game. In Juan F. Thompson’s “Stories I Tell Myself” (2015), his father, Hunter S. Thompson, fires heavy-gauge weapons while ingesting cocaine and referring to Juan as “you stupid waterhead bastard.”Three of these memoirs have stuck in my mind recently. In Alexandra Styron’s “Reading My Father” (2011), William Styron has a temper like pulling the pin on a grenade. In Andre Dubus III’s “Townie” (2011), his father, Andre Dubus, loves the Boston Red Sox but never takes his son to a game. In Juan F. Thompson’s “Stories I Tell Myself” (2015), his father, Hunter S. Thompson, fires heavy-gauge weapons while ingesting cocaine and referring to Juan as “you stupid waterhead bastard.”
Calvin Trillin — such a famously good dad that I shudder at the possibility one of his daughters will out him as the Great Santini of the West Village — has described the current state of memoir as an “atrocity arms race.” If this is so, then Tracy Tynan, in her new book, “Wear and Tear: The Threads of My Life,” comes to the fight well armed.Calvin Trillin — such a famously good dad that I shudder at the possibility one of his daughters will out him as the Great Santini of the West Village — has described the current state of memoir as an “atrocity arms race.” If this is so, then Tracy Tynan, in her new book, “Wear and Tear: The Threads of My Life,” comes to the fight well armed.
Ms. Tynan’s parents were Kenneth Tynan (1927-1980), the gifted English theater critic and author of the musical sex comedy “Oh! Calcutta!” (1969), and the novelist Elaine Dundy (1921-2008), who wrote the cult classic “The Dud Avocado” (1958).Ms. Tynan’s parents were Kenneth Tynan (1927-1980), the gifted English theater critic and author of the musical sex comedy “Oh! Calcutta!” (1969), and the novelist Elaine Dundy (1921-2008), who wrote the cult classic “The Dud Avocado” (1958).
When they were at home in London, which was rarely, Tynan and Dundy fought like animals. Ms. Tynan recounts cowering as crockery is smashed, insults flung, pasta chucked. Her mother would rush into her daughter’s bedroom shouting, “Your father’s trying to kill me!” (Tynan once broke Dundy’s nose.) Her father would sit on a bedroom window ledge, high above the earth, nearly naked, and shout: “I’m going to jump! I’m going to jump!”When they were at home in London, which was rarely, Tynan and Dundy fought like animals. Ms. Tynan recounts cowering as crockery is smashed, insults flung, pasta chucked. Her mother would rush into her daughter’s bedroom shouting, “Your father’s trying to kill me!” (Tynan once broke Dundy’s nose.) Her father would sit on a bedroom window ledge, high above the earth, nearly naked, and shout: “I’m going to jump! I’m going to jump!”
Ms. Tynan writes, “Most of the time I was scared and confused and felt I was in a movie with lots of crazy people.” She hated the drama but was attracted to it. “When it wasn’t around, life seemed to be drained of color, to turn to black and white, ordinary, dull.”Ms. Tynan writes, “Most of the time I was scared and confused and felt I was in a movie with lots of crazy people.” She hated the drama but was attracted to it. “When it wasn’t around, life seemed to be drained of color, to turn to black and white, ordinary, dull.”
Little about her father was ordinary or dull. Kenneth Tynan’s middle name, aptly, was Peacock. When he attended Oxford, he was known for his spectacular dandyism. He was tall and beautiful and wore things like capes and bottle-green suits made from the baize that covers billiard tables.Little about her father was ordinary or dull. Kenneth Tynan’s middle name, aptly, was Peacock. When he attended Oxford, he was known for his spectacular dandyism. He was tall and beautiful and wore things like capes and bottle-green suits made from the baize that covers billiard tables.
Once he became well known as a critic (his literary motto was “be light, stinging, insolent and melancholy”), he collected famous friends, people like Laurence Olivier, Orson Welles and Leonard Bernstein. He and Dundy once flew to New York from London in order to leap from a cake at the director Mike Nichols’s birthday party.Once he became well known as a critic (his literary motto was “be light, stinging, insolent and melancholy”), he collected famous friends, people like Laurence Olivier, Orson Welles and Leonard Bernstein. He and Dundy once flew to New York from London in order to leap from a cake at the director Mike Nichols’s birthday party.
When his daughter, an only child, turned 21, Tynan thought: Here’s an opportunity for a bash. His friends were invited, less so hers. He rented the venerable Young Vic Theater. The guests included Peter Sellers, Maggie Smith and Liza Minnelli. (Princess Margaret, sadly, was out of town.) Dudley Moore performed. Father and daughter ended the evening snorting cocaine together in the wings.When his daughter, an only child, turned 21, Tynan thought: Here’s an opportunity for a bash. His friends were invited, less so hers. He rented the venerable Young Vic Theater. The guests included Peter Sellers, Maggie Smith and Liza Minnelli. (Princess Margaret, sadly, was out of town.) Dudley Moore performed. Father and daughter ended the evening snorting cocaine together in the wings.
A few days before this party, family friends gave her a different sort of birthday gift. “Their pal Sammy Davis Jr. was in town,” she writes, “and they had arranged to screen his personal copy of ‘Deep Throat,’ the infamous porn film that had come out the previous year in the States, but was still banned in Britain.”A few days before this party, family friends gave her a different sort of birthday gift. “Their pal Sammy Davis Jr. was in town,” she writes, “and they had arranged to screen his personal copy of ‘Deep Throat,’ the infamous porn film that had come out the previous year in the States, but was still banned in Britain.”
She had me, I admit, at Sammy Davis Jr.’s personal copy of “Deep Throat.” But the anecdote is a dark one. At the time, she’d just lost her virginity, had never seen a porn film and was humiliated to attend the screening with her father.She had me, I admit, at Sammy Davis Jr.’s personal copy of “Deep Throat.” But the anecdote is a dark one. At the time, she’d just lost her virginity, had never seen a porn film and was humiliated to attend the screening with her father.
The worst part of growing up the child of Tynan and Dundy wasn’t the fights (you need a flow chart to track their extramarital affairs) but the cruelty and neglect. When he was at home, Tynan would say things to his daughter like, “It doesn’t matter if you’re not beautiful.” And he was the more nurturing parent.The worst part of growing up the child of Tynan and Dundy wasn’t the fights (you need a flow chart to track their extramarital affairs) but the cruelty and neglect. When he was at home, Tynan would say things to his daughter like, “It doesn’t matter if you’re not beautiful.” And he was the more nurturing parent.
Tynan and Dundy divorced when Ms. Tynan was 13. When, later in life, she had established a successful career as a costume designer, she would visit her mother and each time be asked, “What exactly is it that you do?”Tynan and Dundy divorced when Ms. Tynan was 13. When, later in life, she had established a successful career as a costume designer, she would visit her mother and each time be asked, “What exactly is it that you do?”
The conceit of “Wear and Tear” is that Ms. Tynan, who was born in 1952, recounts her life through the clothes she wore in each era: private-school uniforms and bikinis and apple-green shoes and plaid pinafores and Ossie Clark dresses. This works except when it feels forced, which is about half the time.The conceit of “Wear and Tear” is that Ms. Tynan, who was born in 1952, recounts her life through the clothes she wore in each era: private-school uniforms and bikinis and apple-green shoes and plaid pinafores and Ossie Clark dresses. This works except when it feels forced, which is about half the time.
Ms. Tynan absorbed her parents’ obsession with fashion and she writes well about what she calls “my unregenerate preoccupation with the things people wear.” She married the film director Jim McBride and it’s on his movies, including “The Big Easy” (1986) and “Great Balls of Fire!” (1989) that she made her name as a costume designer.Ms. Tynan absorbed her parents’ obsession with fashion and she writes well about what she calls “my unregenerate preoccupation with the things people wear.” She married the film director Jim McBride and it’s on his movies, including “The Big Easy” (1986) and “Great Balls of Fire!” (1989) that she made her name as a costume designer.
This memoir relates behind-the-scenes stories from these films. Ms. Tynan gives a harrowing account of a daughter born three months premature. And she speaks of her continuing struggle to survive her own childhood; silent meditation retreats are involved.This memoir relates behind-the-scenes stories from these films. Ms. Tynan gives a harrowing account of a daughter born three months premature. And she speaks of her continuing struggle to survive her own childhood; silent meditation retreats are involved.
“Wear and Tear” is written cleanly and well, even if it deflates a bit each time Tynan and Dundy aren’t around. “Watching them was like watching a horror movie,” Ms. Tynan writes. When the monsters slink off, our pulse rate declines.“Wear and Tear” is written cleanly and well, even if it deflates a bit each time Tynan and Dundy aren’t around. “Watching them was like watching a horror movie,” Ms. Tynan writes. When the monsters slink off, our pulse rate declines.