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| Protest v parenthood: how the children of political activists suffer in silence | Protest v parenthood: how the children of political activists suffer in silence |
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| As a little girl, Rachel Fast’s parents took her to a Christmas party in the basement of the famous married couple, WEB Du Bois and Shirley Graham, both writers and activists. A giant Christmas tree stood in the corner, music tinkled happily, and the adults milled around drinking. But Fast, the daughter of prominent novelist and then communist activist Howard Fast, was not amused: the children of the Rosenbergs were at the party. Their parents were in prison awaiting execution. “It was imminent,” Fast remembers. | As a little girl, Rachel Fast’s parents took her to a Christmas party in the basement of the famous married couple, WEB Du Bois and Shirley Graham, both writers and activists. A giant Christmas tree stood in the corner, music tinkled happily, and the adults milled around drinking. But Fast, the daughter of prominent novelist and then communist activist Howard Fast, was not amused: the children of the Rosenbergs were at the party. Their parents were in prison awaiting execution. “It was imminent,” Fast remembers. |
| Rachel Fast’s parents had been involved in trying to save the Rosenbergs, who were convicted of espionage, from execution. But the demonstrations, meetings and letter-writing had all failed. | Rachel Fast’s parents had been involved in trying to save the Rosenbergs, who were convicted of espionage, from execution. But the demonstrations, meetings and letter-writing had all failed. |
| “There were a glut of presents underneath the tree that I found depressing and horrifying,” Fast recalls. “It was too much. It was creepy. And the two little boys … I had the simultaneous feeling I should do something for them, and also that they terrified me. I ended up in a corner curled in a chair, crying, petrified. What was happening to their parents could happen to mine.” | “There were a glut of presents underneath the tree that I found depressing and horrifying,” Fast recalls. “It was too much. It was creepy. And the two little boys … I had the simultaneous feeling I should do something for them, and also that they terrified me. I ended up in a corner curled in a chair, crying, petrified. What was happening to their parents could happen to mine.” |
| This scene, as well as her childhood spent in the midst of an activist household, marked her for life. And yet, Fast says, “no one ever asked me how the politics were affecting me”. | This scene, as well as her childhood spent in the midst of an activist household, marked her for life. And yet, Fast says, “no one ever asked me how the politics were affecting me”. |
| ‘Consent was not considered. Devotion was required’ | ‘Consent was not considered. Devotion was required’ |
| Modern activists taking part in the Women’s March on Washington are at the crest of a tide of activism that is overtaking the country in the wake of Trump’s ascendance. And while the time might be right for political resistance in the eyes of many, the time is also right to listen to the now-adult children of past activists, and how their parents’ choices affected them. | Modern activists taking part in the Women’s March on Washington are at the crest of a tide of activism that is overtaking the country in the wake of Trump’s ascendance. And while the time might be right for political resistance in the eyes of many, the time is also right to listen to the now-adult children of past activists, and how their parents’ choices affected them. |
| Consent is understood to be a crucial marker of the health and validity of any interaction involving people. But for children of serious activists, this important ingredient to mental and emotional health is often missing. The result are fragmented families and children who grew up feeling conditionally loved. | Consent is understood to be a crucial marker of the health and validity of any interaction involving people. But for children of serious activists, this important ingredient to mental and emotional health is often missing. The result are fragmented families and children who grew up feeling conditionally loved. |
| Rebecca Walker is a case in point. As the daughter of novelist Alice Walker – the author of The Color Purple – and the white Jewish lawyer Mel Leventhal, Walker has long struggled to come to terms with how her parents’ civil rights activism absorbed her childhood. | Rebecca Walker is a case in point. As the daughter of novelist Alice Walker – the author of The Color Purple – and the white Jewish lawyer Mel Leventhal, Walker has long struggled to come to terms with how her parents’ civil rights activism absorbed her childhood. |
| As a young child, Walker’s parents were married and fighting the Ku Klux Klan. Walker’s father was working to desegregate schools and to get the supreme court to give basic services to black communities, while her mother was writing and agitating for both civil rights and women’s rights. | As a young child, Walker’s parents were married and fighting the Ku Klux Klan. Walker’s father was working to desegregate schools and to get the supreme court to give basic services to black communities, while her mother was writing and agitating for both civil rights and women’s rights. |
| “My parents were so deeply involved in the civil rights movement that a lot of my needs as a young person were not fully seen and addressed, or considered as important as the movement,” Walker, who is herself a respected novelist, said in a phone interview. | “My parents were so deeply involved in the civil rights movement that a lot of my needs as a young person were not fully seen and addressed, or considered as important as the movement,” Walker, who is herself a respected novelist, said in a phone interview. |
| Ultimately, there was a break between mother and daughter, made public by their respective published points of view. Alice Walker’s years-later response on her website, where she strongly disagreed with her daughter’s recall. | |
| “It wasn’t an intentional neglect … [they were] missing what was happening in our lives because there was so much consuming their lives. It felt very lonely and vulnerable. Gandhi’s children had a lot of problems with him; it’s hard to find children of very visible and profound activists whose children felt cared for and nurtured in the same way the movements were.” | “It wasn’t an intentional neglect … [they were] missing what was happening in our lives because there was so much consuming their lives. It felt very lonely and vulnerable. Gandhi’s children had a lot of problems with him; it’s hard to find children of very visible and profound activists whose children felt cared for and nurtured in the same way the movements were.” |
| A lot of my needs as a young person were not fully seen and addressed, or considered as important as the movement | A lot of my needs as a young person were not fully seen and addressed, or considered as important as the movement |
| The words “anxiety”, “insecurity” and “no communication” come up frequently in interviews of children of rigorous activists – something meticulously documented in John Blake’s book The Children of the Movement, which catalogs a series of interviews with the adult children of civil rights activist leaders. Most expressed a lifelong anxiety about their relevance in their own families, but also about whether they had even be seen as a person outside of the concerns of the movement. | The words “anxiety”, “insecurity” and “no communication” come up frequently in interviews of children of rigorous activists – something meticulously documented in John Blake’s book The Children of the Movement, which catalogs a series of interviews with the adult children of civil rights activist leaders. Most expressed a lifelong anxiety about their relevance in their own families, but also about whether they had even be seen as a person outside of the concerns of the movement. |
| In many cases, consent was not even considered; devotion was required. As Brown writes, “a large number of them [adult children of activists] are emotionally distant from their parents who, they say, are more suited for protest than parenthood.” | In many cases, consent was not even considered; devotion was required. As Brown writes, “a large number of them [adult children of activists] are emotionally distant from their parents who, they say, are more suited for protest than parenthood.” |
| Blake’s book mentions the case for Bokar Ture, the son of Kwame Ture (born Stokely Carmichael), the man who came up with “black power”, one of the most impactful and long-lasting phrases of the civil rights movement and the beginning of the Black Power movement. Bokar and his mother Marlyatou Barry, Kwame Ture’s ex-wife, both expressed deep respect for Kwame Ture’s activism, as well as regrets over his absolutism. “I’m not against being an activist, I respect that. But I think life has to be balanced. [He] was a good person but I don’t think he was meant to get married and have kids,” he said. | Blake’s book mentions the case for Bokar Ture, the son of Kwame Ture (born Stokely Carmichael), the man who came up with “black power”, one of the most impactful and long-lasting phrases of the civil rights movement and the beginning of the Black Power movement. Bokar and his mother Marlyatou Barry, Kwame Ture’s ex-wife, both expressed deep respect for Kwame Ture’s activism, as well as regrets over his absolutism. “I’m not against being an activist, I respect that. But I think life has to be balanced. [He] was a good person but I don’t think he was meant to get married and have kids,” he said. |
| Likewise, Walker speaks admiringly of her parent’s work and has enormous respect for the importance and strength of their fight. Yet as a teenager and young adult she grappled with the issue of consent, too. | Likewise, Walker speaks admiringly of her parent’s work and has enormous respect for the importance and strength of their fight. Yet as a teenager and young adult she grappled with the issue of consent, too. |
| “My parents were always talking to me about the work they were doing. There was no sense of, ‘What do you think about this, do you feel comfortable being a part of my narrative, my story, my belief system?’” she says. “Because that feedback loop wasn’t happening, they often used me – I don’t mean exploited – but without careful consideration.” | “My parents were always talking to me about the work they were doing. There was no sense of, ‘What do you think about this, do you feel comfortable being a part of my narrative, my story, my belief system?’” she says. “Because that feedback loop wasn’t happening, they often used me – I don’t mean exploited – but without careful consideration.” |
| As with the other children of activists, Walker recalls that “ideology was very much seen as connective tissue. A lot of those ideas were used as bonding ideas, the way some people in families use rituals like holidays,” Walker says. | As with the other children of activists, Walker recalls that “ideology was very much seen as connective tissue. A lot of those ideas were used as bonding ideas, the way some people in families use rituals like holidays,” Walker says. |
| Walker, as the child of a black feminist and a white Jewish activist, was the embodiment of the world they were fighting for. In her memoir, Black, White and Jewish, she recalled how the world did not treat her as such; she was not given any guidance on how to navigate being biracial during a time when the civil rights movement was leaning toward, as she says, “black on black love” as the answer to obtaining equality. | Walker, as the child of a black feminist and a white Jewish activist, was the embodiment of the world they were fighting for. In her memoir, Black, White and Jewish, she recalled how the world did not treat her as such; she was not given any guidance on how to navigate being biracial during a time when the civil rights movement was leaning toward, as she says, “black on black love” as the answer to obtaining equality. |
| Walker notes that often, the values of many activist movements are based in an ideal of freedom, and yet that freedom is not offered to the children of the movement. | Walker notes that often, the values of many activist movements are based in an ideal of freedom, and yet that freedom is not offered to the children of the movement. |
| “There is a sense that if you don’t [become an activist] you will be punished some way,” she says. “It’s not always explicit, there could be a sense of dismissal in the family unit. That can be an oppressive dynamic, a mental, psychological control. It’s ironic because you are speaking about people who speak out about freedom and claiming personal control, yet you have to struggle against their definitions of that.” | “There is a sense that if you don’t [become an activist] you will be punished some way,” she says. “It’s not always explicit, there could be a sense of dismissal in the family unit. That can be an oppressive dynamic, a mental, psychological control. It’s ironic because you are speaking about people who speak out about freedom and claiming personal control, yet you have to struggle against their definitions of that.” |
| ‘No one ever asked me how the politics were affecting me’ | ‘No one ever asked me how the politics were affecting me’ |
| Walker’s experience is in many ways reflected in the childhoods of Jonathan and Rachel Fast. In 1943, their father Howard joined the Communist party. During the time of McCarthyism, Fast was outspoken about his frustration with capitalism. In 1950, he was called before the House committee on un-American activities, and after refusing to disclose his cohorts, he was sentenced to three months in prison. | Walker’s experience is in many ways reflected in the childhoods of Jonathan and Rachel Fast. In 1943, their father Howard joined the Communist party. During the time of McCarthyism, Fast was outspoken about his frustration with capitalism. In 1950, he was called before the House committee on un-American activities, and after refusing to disclose his cohorts, he was sentenced to three months in prison. |
| Their son Jonathan, a novelist, non-fiction writer and professor at Yeshiva University, often gives lectures about bullying and shame. From his earliest memories, he recalls a life focused on his father’s political activism. “Family and children were unimportant – all he was interested in was his work,” Fast recalls over the phone. | Their son Jonathan, a novelist, non-fiction writer and professor at Yeshiva University, often gives lectures about bullying and shame. From his earliest memories, he recalls a life focused on his father’s political activism. “Family and children were unimportant – all he was interested in was his work,” Fast recalls over the phone. |
| I remember father spreading out the New York Times and we’d read the newspaper together, and he’d point out all the lies | I remember father spreading out the New York Times and we’d read the newspaper together, and he’d point out all the lies |
| Jonathan and Rachel had, in many ways, a privileged childhood – full of exciting gatherings, with a high-quality education. Yet when I ask each of them about their emotional life back then, they are momentarily silenced. Rachel Fast says, “I was joking with Jon [her brother] and said I think I was pretty happy and then I got language. And started to be able to have conversations with father.” | Jonathan and Rachel had, in many ways, a privileged childhood – full of exciting gatherings, with a high-quality education. Yet when I ask each of them about their emotional life back then, they are momentarily silenced. Rachel Fast says, “I was joking with Jon [her brother] and said I think I was pretty happy and then I got language. And started to be able to have conversations with father.” |
| Those conversations were more like diatribes, a ferocious, intimately informed education on the state of politics in America and abroad. “I remember father spreading out the New York Times and we’d read the newspaper together, and he’d point out all the lies,” she says. | Those conversations were more like diatribes, a ferocious, intimately informed education on the state of politics in America and abroad. “I remember father spreading out the New York Times and we’d read the newspaper together, and he’d point out all the lies,” she says. |
| As the Fast children grew, their world became even more entrenched in communism. Their schools were all populated by other communist children, where they were taught communist propaganda songs by a black folk singer and even summer camps were “commie camps”, as Jonathan Fast calls it. | As the Fast children grew, their world became even more entrenched in communism. Their schools were all populated by other communist children, where they were taught communist propaganda songs by a black folk singer and even summer camps were “commie camps”, as Jonathan Fast calls it. |
| Both Jonathan and Rachel Fast recall a constant sense of depression and anxiety permeating their growing years, punctuated by astonishing assaults to their security. The FBI used scare tactics on communists; in the dead of night, the FBI came to their New York brownstone and began banging on the door. Howard Fast went running down the stairs, while Rachel Fast clung to her mother’s knees, crying hysterically. “These galuts banged on the door,” she says, “and father yelled, ‘Do you have a warrant?! If you don’t have one get the fuck away!’ and they went away.” | Both Jonathan and Rachel Fast recall a constant sense of depression and anxiety permeating their growing years, punctuated by astonishing assaults to their security. The FBI used scare tactics on communists; in the dead of night, the FBI came to their New York brownstone and began banging on the door. Howard Fast went running down the stairs, while Rachel Fast clung to her mother’s knees, crying hysterically. “These galuts banged on the door,” she says, “and father yelled, ‘Do you have a warrant?! If you don’t have one get the fuck away!’ and they went away.” |
| In 1950, when Howard Fast was imprisoned for his refusal to name names, the children were told he was visiting Paris. Howard Fast was actually sitting on death row in San Quentin, before being transferred to a minimum security prison in Kentucky. “He had a friend in Paris, so his friend in Paris would send him postcards and he would mail them to my mother, who would share it to my sister,” Jonathan Fast recalls. | In 1950, when Howard Fast was imprisoned for his refusal to name names, the children were told he was visiting Paris. Howard Fast was actually sitting on death row in San Quentin, before being transferred to a minimum security prison in Kentucky. “He had a friend in Paris, so his friend in Paris would send him postcards and he would mail them to my mother, who would share it to my sister,” Jonathan Fast recalls. |
| Even as the stakes for their father were raised to life or death, there was no room for discussion about the children’s feelings regarding their parents’ deepening activism. | Even as the stakes for their father were raised to life or death, there was no room for discussion about the children’s feelings regarding their parents’ deepening activism. |
| Howard Fast left the Communist party in 1951 after he returned home from prison. As the Fast children aged, their lack of an emotional connection with their father played havoc with their sense of self. Neither consider themselves activists. “My childhood made me a coward,” Rachel Fast says. | Howard Fast left the Communist party in 1951 after he returned home from prison. As the Fast children aged, their lack of an emotional connection with their father played havoc with their sense of self. Neither consider themselves activists. “My childhood made me a coward,” Rachel Fast says. |
| “I remember constantly feeling shame about my relationship with father,” says Jonathan Fast, whose work on shame can be seen as an interesting extension of the struggle he experienced as a young man in his family. Discussing the core idea of his writing on shame, Fast says: “Our main need in life is to belong to groups of equal or higher status, and when our membership in the group is endangered, we experience shame.” | “I remember constantly feeling shame about my relationship with father,” says Jonathan Fast, whose work on shame can be seen as an interesting extension of the struggle he experienced as a young man in his family. Discussing the core idea of his writing on shame, Fast says: “Our main need in life is to belong to groups of equal or higher status, and when our membership in the group is endangered, we experience shame.” |
| Activists who make their children’s lives about their chosen movement without asking for their feedback risk fragmenting what could be their greatest source of strength and renewal: the family bond. | Activists who make their children’s lives about their chosen movement without asking for their feedback risk fragmenting what could be their greatest source of strength and renewal: the family bond. |
| Rebecca Walker says that “the nurturing of the family that has to be thought of as self-care. Talking to children, giving them a voice … I’ve only seen fractured families with a lot of injured people and activists who become isolated, exhausted, and often very lonely and depressed.” | Rebecca Walker says that “the nurturing of the family that has to be thought of as self-care. Talking to children, giving them a voice … I’ve only seen fractured families with a lot of injured people and activists who become isolated, exhausted, and often very lonely and depressed.” |
| Walker herself has a young son, and she has consciously chosen to cultivate his individual opinions and choices, politically and religiously. “I’m a 25-year Buddhist now and raised my son to the best of those ideas, but I tell him: ‘You have to come to your own understanding, if you have questions, ask me.’” | Walker herself has a young son, and she has consciously chosen to cultivate his individual opinions and choices, politically and religiously. “I’m a 25-year Buddhist now and raised my son to the best of those ideas, but I tell him: ‘You have to come to your own understanding, if you have questions, ask me.’” |