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| At last we have something to terrify President Trump: Pinocchio | At last we have something to terrify President Trump: Pinocchio |
| (about 3 hours later) | |
| Speaking at an event the other day, Donald Trump sought to boast about his bill-signing prowess. “We’ve signed more bills – and I’m talking about through the legislature – than any president, ever,” he said. “For a while Harry Truman had us. But now, I think, we have everybody.” | Speaking at an event the other day, Donald Trump sought to boast about his bill-signing prowess. “We’ve signed more bills – and I’m talking about through the legislature – than any president, ever,” he said. “For a while Harry Truman had us. But now, I think, we have everybody.” |
| Then, in a rare moment of self-awareness, he seemed to publicly acknowledge the possibility that his boast might be a lie. “I better say ‘think’,” he said. “Otherwise they give you a Pinocchio. And I don’t like Pinocchios.” | |
| He was referring to the Washington Post’s habit of rating the inaccuracy of his falsehoods with little Pinocchio heads instead of stars. It’s odd to hear that he doesn’t like Pinocchios, because it’s the one measure in which he can truly claim to have outstripped all rivals. It’s also interesting that he thinks saying “think” will inoculate him against accusations of lying, as if the wording of the untruth, rather than the untruth of the untruth, were the problem. | He was referring to the Washington Post’s habit of rating the inaccuracy of his falsehoods with little Pinocchio heads instead of stars. It’s odd to hear that he doesn’t like Pinocchios, because it’s the one measure in which he can truly claim to have outstripped all rivals. It’s also interesting that he thinks saying “think” will inoculate him against accusations of lying, as if the wording of the untruth, rather than the untruth of the untruth, were the problem. |
| It almost goes without saying that Trump hasn’t signed more bills into law in six months than Truman did. Or Roosevelt, or Jimmy Carter, or Bill Clinton. As the New York Times reported, Trump’s signing rate is actually slightly below average for recent presidents. | |
| To an extent, Trump’s tactic seems to have worked: the Washington Post, acknowledging the president’s precautionary afterthought, declined to award any Pinocchios in this case. It did take the time to rubbish both the letter and the spirit of his claim, pointing out that while Trump had signed 42 bills at the six-month mark to Obama’s 39, Obama’s legislative output ran to more than twice as many pages. More than half of Trump’s bills are just a page long, including a law passed that renames a government outpatient clinic in Pago Pago. I’ve a feeling Trump will still look at the absence of Pinocchio heads and call it a victory. | To an extent, Trump’s tactic seems to have worked: the Washington Post, acknowledging the president’s precautionary afterthought, declined to award any Pinocchios in this case. It did take the time to rubbish both the letter and the spirit of his claim, pointing out that while Trump had signed 42 bills at the six-month mark to Obama’s 39, Obama’s legislative output ran to more than twice as many pages. More than half of Trump’s bills are just a page long, including a law passed that renames a government outpatient clinic in Pago Pago. I’ve a feeling Trump will still look at the absence of Pinocchio heads and call it a victory. |
| The dangers of losing focus | The dangers of losing focus |
| At first it sounded to me like one of those strange challenges people take up on YouTube: a woman somehow managed to get 27 contact lenses into the same eye. As a contact lens wearer myself, I was quietly impressed. | At first it sounded to me like one of those strange challenges people take up on YouTube: a woman somehow managed to get 27 contact lenses into the same eye. As a contact lens wearer myself, I was quietly impressed. |
| The story comes from a report in the British Medical Journal about a woman – a contact lens wearer for 35 years – having to have 27 gummed-together lenses (in two clumps, of 17 and 10) removed while undergoing cataract surgery. She was, apparently, as surprised as everybody else in the room. | The story comes from a report in the British Medical Journal about a woman – a contact lens wearer for 35 years – having to have 27 gummed-together lenses (in two clumps, of 17 and 10) removed while undergoing cataract surgery. She was, apparently, as surprised as everybody else in the room. |
| I’ve also worn lenses for 35 years, and in that time I have managed to do most of the stupid things you can do with them. I’ve put them in backwards and in the wrong eyes on countless occasions. I’ve put them in after I’ve chopped chillies. I’ve picked them up off the floor and reinstalled them. I’ve left daily lenses in for days, until they became opaque. More than once I’ve spent a drunken 20 minutes dragging a finger across my eyeball, trying to remove a lens I had, in fact, already taken out. | I’ve also worn lenses for 35 years, and in that time I have managed to do most of the stupid things you can do with them. I’ve put them in backwards and in the wrong eyes on countless occasions. I’ve put them in after I’ve chopped chillies. I’ve picked them up off the floor and reinstalled them. I’ve left daily lenses in for days, until they became opaque. More than once I’ve spent a drunken 20 minutes dragging a finger across my eyeball, trying to remove a lens I had, in fact, already taken out. |
| But the most contact lenses I’ve ever managed to put in one eye is two, and I could tell something was wrong immediately, even if it took me a while to figure out exactly what it was. I’d be willing to try for three if it was for a charity thing, but that’s my absolute limit. | But the most contact lenses I’ve ever managed to put in one eye is two, and I could tell something was wrong immediately, even if it took me a while to figure out exactly what it was. I’d be willing to try for three if it was for a charity thing, but that’s my absolute limit. |
| All clued up | All clued up |
| The study concluding that cryptic crossword enthusiasts have brains equivalent to people 10 years younger is disappointing news for those of us who have been wasting our time on the word wheel. I did, as it happens, manage to finish the Guardian crossword yesterday, thanks to an extremely delayed train, but it took a lot out of me. | |
| I sometimes do the crossword with three friends, as a sort of team effort – which gets the job done quicker and, more importantly, allows for a degree of showing off. I left my solo completed puzzle face up on the kitchen table all day yesterday, and no one even noticed. |