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| Freewheelin’ Phil faces down the real opposition – his own party | Freewheelin’ Phil faces down the real opposition – his own party |
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| Freewheelin’ Phil couldn’t keep the smile off his face at Treasury questions. With his cabinet rivals having tried and failed to get rid of him over the weekend in a series of briefings and counter-briefings, he was now pretty much untouchable. The Maybot may still have been nominally in charge, but she was prime minister in name only. She had no real power. Certainly not over him. If he played his cards right, the country was his for the taking. It was just a matter of picking the right time. | Freewheelin’ Phil couldn’t keep the smile off his face at Treasury questions. With his cabinet rivals having tried and failed to get rid of him over the weekend in a series of briefings and counter-briefings, he was now pretty much untouchable. The Maybot may still have been nominally in charge, but she was prime minister in name only. She had no real power. Certainly not over him. If he played his cards right, the country was his for the taking. It was just a matter of picking the right time. |
| The chancellor was so lost in thought – the enjoyment of Boris Johnson and David Davis’s very obvious discomfort was a pleasure not to be hurried – that he missed the first question on levels of pay. No matter. He gave the chief secretary to the Treasury a nudge. She could deal with that. | The chancellor was so lost in thought – the enjoyment of Boris Johnson and David Davis’s very obvious discomfort was a pleasure not to be hurried – that he missed the first question on levels of pay. No matter. He gave the chief secretary to the Treasury a nudge. She could deal with that. |
| Liz Truss looked momentarily surprised but gamely rose to take the incoming. When you came to think about it, she ad libbed, people weren’t so badly off as all that. A 1% pay rise was better than no pay rise at all, and some teachers and nurses were being spoiled rotten with a 3% increase. Just think of all the fun they could have with an extra £10 per week. In any case, most people should just count themselves lucky to have a job. A thought most of the country have frequently had about Truss. | Liz Truss looked momentarily surprised but gamely rose to take the incoming. When you came to think about it, she ad libbed, people weren’t so badly off as all that. A 1% pay rise was better than no pay rise at all, and some teachers and nurses were being spoiled rotten with a 3% increase. Just think of all the fun they could have with an extra £10 per week. In any case, most people should just count themselves lucky to have a job. A thought most of the country have frequently had about Truss. |
| This wasn’t quite the moment the shadow chancellor had been waiting for. John McDonnell had anticipated unleashing his scorn on Freewheelin’ Phil rather than his sidekick, but he couldn’t contain himself a second longer. “Does not the chief secretary to the Treasury agree,” he said, reading off a script he had written the night before, “that it ill becomes a multimillionaire earning £145,000 a year, admittedly in a temporary job, and living in two grace-and-favour properties at the taxpayer’s expense, to attack public sector workers as being ‘overpaid’?” | This wasn’t quite the moment the shadow chancellor had been waiting for. John McDonnell had anticipated unleashing his scorn on Freewheelin’ Phil rather than his sidekick, but he couldn’t contain himself a second longer. “Does not the chief secretary to the Treasury agree,” he said, reading off a script he had written the night before, “that it ill becomes a multimillionaire earning £145,000 a year, admittedly in a temporary job, and living in two grace-and-favour properties at the taxpayer’s expense, to attack public sector workers as being ‘overpaid’?” |
| Having delivered what he had been sure were his killer lines, McDonnell was disturbed to notice that the chancellor was openly laughing at him. Freewheelin’ Phil just didn’t care. There was nothing Labour could say that would hurt him. More importantly, there was nothing his own party – the real opposition – could do to hurt him. So what if he had said public sector workers were overpaid? He was Teflon man. | Having delivered what he had been sure were his killer lines, McDonnell was disturbed to notice that the chancellor was openly laughing at him. Freewheelin’ Phil just didn’t care. There was nothing Labour could say that would hurt him. More importantly, there was nothing his own party – the real opposition – could do to hurt him. So what if he had said public sector workers were overpaid? He was Teflon man. |
| Freewheelin’ Phil languidly dragged himself to his feet. Since he was in the house, he might as well answer a question. Was it not true, asked Labour’s Chris Leslie, that a hard Brexit represented the single biggest threat to the economy? Indeed it was. “On an issue as important to our nation’s future as our exit from the European Union,” Freewheelin’ Phil said, with what he hoped was the right level of gravitas, “I welcome any opportunity to build consensus across the house and the nation.” Since his own party was stuffed full of half-witted ideologues, he’d work with anyone showing signs of sentient life. | Freewheelin’ Phil languidly dragged himself to his feet. Since he was in the house, he might as well answer a question. Was it not true, asked Labour’s Chris Leslie, that a hard Brexit represented the single biggest threat to the economy? Indeed it was. “On an issue as important to our nation’s future as our exit from the European Union,” Freewheelin’ Phil said, with what he hoped was the right level of gravitas, “I welcome any opportunity to build consensus across the house and the nation.” Since his own party was stuffed full of half-witted ideologues, he’d work with anyone showing signs of sentient life. |
| Which precluded a borderline apoplectic Sir Edward Leigh, a Conservative for whom the only good Brexit is a Brexit that reduces the country to its knees. Could the chancellor confirm that Britain would be definitely leaving the single market and customs union? Freewheelin’ Phil looked at his fellow Conservative with contempt. He could because that was a legal requirement. But he could also confirm that Britain would be rejoining both of them at the earliest opportunity if he had anything to do with it. The Brexiters scuttled out the chamber to begin their plotting afresh. So much for the Maybot’s call for an end to internecine warfare. | Which precluded a borderline apoplectic Sir Edward Leigh, a Conservative for whom the only good Brexit is a Brexit that reduces the country to its knees. Could the chancellor confirm that Britain would be definitely leaving the single market and customs union? Freewheelin’ Phil looked at his fellow Conservative with contempt. He could because that was a legal requirement. But he could also confirm that Britain would be rejoining both of them at the earliest opportunity if he had anything to do with it. The Brexiters scuttled out the chamber to begin their plotting afresh. So much for the Maybot’s call for an end to internecine warfare. |
| Peter Dowd, the shadow chief secretary to the Treasury, had one last stab at exploiting the differences in the government ranks. The chancellor was an enfeebled man, he observed. A man reduced to handing out cash to the DUP to save his job. Freewheelin’ Phil just laughed. It hadn’t been his job that the DUP money had bought. | Peter Dowd, the shadow chief secretary to the Treasury, had one last stab at exploiting the differences in the government ranks. The chancellor was an enfeebled man, he observed. A man reduced to handing out cash to the DUP to save his job. Freewheelin’ Phil just laughed. It hadn’t been his job that the DUP money had bought. |
| “I do not know which planet he lives on,” he said, “but I do not feel particularly enfeebled.” Or at all. He’d seen off Boris and David Davis. Only yesterday he had made Justine Greening sweat by telling her there was no more cash for overpaid teachers. The Maybot was on life support. And his hand was on the off switch. The government might be on its last legs. But he had never felt better. | “I do not know which planet he lives on,” he said, “but I do not feel particularly enfeebled.” Or at all. He’d seen off Boris and David Davis. Only yesterday he had made Justine Greening sweat by telling her there was no more cash for overpaid teachers. The Maybot was on life support. And his hand was on the off switch. The government might be on its last legs. But he had never felt better. |
| Philip Hammond | Philip Hammond |
| The politics sketch | The politics sketch |
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| Public sector pay | Public sector pay |
| Public services policy | Public services policy |
| Brexit | Brexit |
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