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The #MeToo Moment: Navigating Sex in the ‘Gray Zone’ | The #MeToo Moment: Navigating Sex in the ‘Gray Zone’ |
(2 days later) | |
As sexual misconduct continues to dominate the news, we’re providing updates and analysis in a new newsletter. Sign up here to receive future installments and be tuned for more from The New York Times’s new Gender Initiative. | As sexual misconduct continues to dominate the news, we’re providing updates and analysis in a new newsletter. Sign up here to receive future installments and be tuned for more from The New York Times’s new Gender Initiative. |
What is “gray zone” sex? This expression has been used to describe a particular kind of sexual encounter, one that may not be viewed as “sexual assault,” but that constitutes something far murkier and more troubling than simply a “bad date.” Until recently, few women had the words to describe it, though it’s a place where most of us have been. | What is “gray zone” sex? This expression has been used to describe a particular kind of sexual encounter, one that may not be viewed as “sexual assault,” but that constitutes something far murkier and more troubling than simply a “bad date.” Until recently, few women had the words to describe it, though it’s a place where most of us have been. |
But in this #MeToo moment, many women privately and publicly have found the language to speak out about it. It was there in The New Yorker short story, “Cat Person,” which went viral a few months ago; it was there again in a young woman’s online account of an incident involving Aziz Ansari. | But in this #MeToo moment, many women privately and publicly have found the language to speak out about it. It was there in The New Yorker short story, “Cat Person,” which went viral a few months ago; it was there again in a young woman’s online account of an incident involving Aziz Ansari. |
Much in the same way that the cases of Harvey Weinstein and others exposed the nasty pervasiveness of workplace sexual harassment and assault, these “gray zone” stories have prompted equally important conversations about sexual consent, sexual assault and how we understand the interplay of — and at times ambiguity between — the two. | Much in the same way that the cases of Harvey Weinstein and others exposed the nasty pervasiveness of workplace sexual harassment and assault, these “gray zone” stories have prompted equally important conversations about sexual consent, sexual assault and how we understand the interplay of — and at times ambiguity between — the two. |
It has forced many of us to rethink and reflect on our own sexual pasts. | It has forced many of us to rethink and reflect on our own sexual pasts. |
On college campuses, that discussion has been particularly pronounced — in part because, for some time, students and administrators have grappled with how best to talk about and teach consent. | On college campuses, that discussion has been particularly pronounced — in part because, for some time, students and administrators have grappled with how best to talk about and teach consent. |
And so, we decided to reach out to our college-aged readers. | And so, we decided to reach out to our college-aged readers. |
We’re looking for college students worldwide who want to share their stories navigating — and negotiating — sexual consent. | We’re looking for college students worldwide who want to share their stories navigating — and negotiating — sexual consent. |
How do you handle consent for sexual intimacy in relationships and encounters? Do you have a particular experience you find yourself thinking back to? What was said, texted or hinted at, through words or physical cues, that moved the encounter forward — or stopped it? | How do you handle consent for sexual intimacy in relationships and encounters? Do you have a particular experience you find yourself thinking back to? What was said, texted or hinted at, through words or physical cues, that moved the encounter forward — or stopped it? |
We are looking for submissions of 500 words or fewer and will select our favorites to publish in Modern Love. Submit using the form here. | We are looking for submissions of 500 words or fewer and will select our favorites to publish in Modern Love. Submit using the form here. |
(Not a college student but still want to share your story? Email us at nytgender@nytimes.com.) | (Not a college student but still want to share your story? Email us at nytgender@nytimes.com.) |
There continues to be no shortage of #MeToo stories in the news. Here’s what we’re reading this week: | |
From The New York Times: | From The New York Times: |
The Boys Are Not All RightWhat do America’s mass shootings have in common? Guns, yes. But also, boys. | The Boys Are Not All RightWhat do America’s mass shootings have in common? Guns, yes. But also, boys. |
The #MeToo RacesNearly a dozen special elections are being held in 2018 to fill vacancies left by lawmakers accused of sexual harassment or misconduct. | The #MeToo RacesNearly a dozen special elections are being held in 2018 to fill vacancies left by lawmakers accused of sexual harassment or misconduct. |
The Sheer Number Who Can Say #MeTooSexual harassment is surprisingly pervasive, a new survey finds, and men are targets, too. | The Sheer Number Who Can Say #MeTooSexual harassment is surprisingly pervasive, a new survey finds, and men are targets, too. |
A Director’s Apology Adds Momentum to South Korea’s #MeToo Movement “I am ready to take all punishment, including legal responsibilities for my crimes,” said Lee Youn-taek, a prominent theater director. | A Director’s Apology Adds Momentum to South Korea’s #MeToo Movement “I am ready to take all punishment, including legal responsibilities for my crimes,” said Lee Youn-taek, a prominent theater director. |
These Transgender Children Say They’re ThrivingThey want to help others do the same. | These Transgender Children Say They’re ThrivingThey want to help others do the same. |
An Olympic Figure Skater Who Also Made New York Times HistoryMaribel Vinson, a three-time Olympian and coach, had another career distinction: She was the first female sportswriter at The New York Times. | An Olympic Figure Skater Who Also Made New York Times HistoryMaribel Vinson, a three-time Olympian and coach, had another career distinction: She was the first female sportswriter at The New York Times. |
From Elsewhere on the Web | From Elsewhere on the Web |
Barclays Pays Women Half That of MenBloomberg dubs the gap “the paytriarchy.” | Barclays Pays Women Half That of MenBloomberg dubs the gap “the paytriarchy.” |
Is the Red Stiletto Emoji Sexist?From The Washington Post, the back story to the new women’s shoe icon. | Is the Red Stiletto Emoji Sexist?From The Washington Post, the back story to the new women’s shoe icon. |
Sorry, R. Kelly, Wakanda Wants Nothing to Do With You Sometimes the internet is great. Thanks, Vibe. | Sorry, R. Kelly, Wakanda Wants Nothing to Do With You Sometimes the internet is great. Thanks, Vibe. |
Want to receive this article in your inbox? Sign up here for the #MeToo Moment, and stay tuned for a relaunch of our newsletter coming very soon. You can also read us on the web or listen to us on WNYC’s The Takeaway. Share your feedback at nytgender@nytimes.com. | Want to receive this article in your inbox? Sign up here for the #MeToo Moment, and stay tuned for a relaunch of our newsletter coming very soon. You can also read us on the web or listen to us on WNYC’s The Takeaway. Share your feedback at nytgender@nytimes.com. |
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