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Stephen Colbert Imagines How the Michael Cohen F.B.I. Raid Went Stephen Colbert Imagines How the Michael Cohen F.B.I. Raid Went
(4 months later)
Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. If you’re interested in hearing from The Times regularly about great TV, sign up for our Watching newsletter and get recommendations straight to your inbox.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. If you’re interested in hearing from The Times regularly about great TV, sign up for our Watching newsletter and get recommendations straight to your inbox.
Two of late-night television’s favorite topics — the Russia investigation and the Stormy Daniels scandal — got entangled on Monday: The F.B.I. raided the office of Michael Cohen, President Trump’s lawyer, who paid the pornographic film actress Stephanie Clifford $130,000. Clifford, who is known as Stormy Daniels, has said it was hush money to keep her from talking about her affair with Trump.Two of late-night television’s favorite topics — the Russia investigation and the Stormy Daniels scandal — got entangled on Monday: The F.B.I. raided the office of Michael Cohen, President Trump’s lawyer, who paid the pornographic film actress Stephanie Clifford $130,000. Clifford, who is known as Stormy Daniels, has said it was hush money to keep her from talking about her affair with Trump.
Stephen Colbert delivered the Cohen news with glee. So did his fellow hosts.Stephen Colbert delivered the Cohen news with glee. So did his fellow hosts.
“Today on a tip from Mueller, the F.B.I. raided Cohen’s office, ‘seizing records related to several topics, including payments to a pornographic film actress.’ They got everything: They got all of his information about porn in a folder marked ‘finances,’ and all of his information about finances in a folder marked ‘porn.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“Porn star Stormy Daniels says that right before the election, she was paid $130,000 by Trump’s lawyer Michael Cohen to stay silent about her alleged doin’ it with the Donald. Future generations will learn all about it in the Trump presidential library’s adult section.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“The F.B.I. raided the office of President Trump’s personal attorney Michael Cohen. Of course, out of habit Cohen offered the agents $130,000 just to keep the whole thing quiet.” — CONAN O’BRIEN
“They raided his office; they also raided his house and his hotel room. He has a house and a hotel room? Why? The fact that the guy who pays off porn stars has a hotel room is, to me, a red flag.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
Cardi B joined Jimmy Fallon on Monday to co-host “The Tonight Show.” She entered strongly, but then got disappointingly few speaking lines after that. Here’s how she came in:Cardi B joined Jimmy Fallon on Monday to co-host “The Tonight Show.” She entered strongly, but then got disappointingly few speaking lines after that. Here’s how she came in:
CARDI B: I’m making history tonight, you know what I’m saying? My album just dropped, but I’m the first late-night co-host that isn’t a white guy. What’s up?
JIMMY FALLON: That’s correct. You are promoting your new album, “Invasion of Privacy” — or as Facebook users are calling it, “Little Too Close to Home.”
“In a new interview, Sarah Palin said that she would run for higher office again in a heartbeat. Ha. Aw, Sarah Palin. She reminds me of when I was a little kid and I thought ‘The Shining’ was the scariest thing in the world. Now I watch it and I just laugh and laugh.” — SETH MEYERS
“Today at Bill Cosby’s new trial, a woman protested topless in order to make Bill Cosby feel uncomfortable. Legal experts are describing the effort as a failure.” — CONAN O’BRIEN
Tiffany Haddish made a cameo during Jokes Seth Can’t Tell, a recurring segment on “Late Night.” In it, Meyers gets assists on politically incorrect jokes from some of his female writers.Tiffany Haddish made a cameo during Jokes Seth Can’t Tell, a recurring segment on “Late Night.” In it, Meyers gets assists on politically incorrect jokes from some of his female writers.
No one has ever played this game like Cardi B.No one has ever played this game like Cardi B.
Hilary Swank took three years off from acting, in part to take care of an ailing parent. Now she’s back with “Trust,” a drama series on FX.Hilary Swank took three years off from acting, in part to take care of an ailing parent. Now she’s back with “Trust,” a drama series on FX.
Before her appearance on “The Tonight Show,” Cardi B gave two performances on “Saturday Night Live” over the weekend, doing a high-energy medley and the cautionary ballad “Be Careful.”Before her appearance on “The Tonight Show,” Cardi B gave two performances on “Saturday Night Live” over the weekend, doing a high-energy medley and the cautionary ballad “Be Careful.”