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| Why is David Miliband talking about Brexit in a rice factory? | Why is David Miliband talking about Brexit in a rice factory? |
| (about 2 months later) | |
| So this is what Brexit boils down to: rice. Brexit doesn’t mean Brexit, it means … rice. Bags and bags, literally, of rice. It means three Artists Formerly Known As Cabinet Ministers (Nick Clegg, Nicky Morgan and David Miliband) standing in a rice factory in Essex – a Tilda rice factory, in case you missed the huge banner, in a product placement more outstanding than the massive cups of Pepsi the US X Factor judges have to drink from. | So this is what Brexit boils down to: rice. Brexit doesn’t mean Brexit, it means … rice. Bags and bags, literally, of rice. It means three Artists Formerly Known As Cabinet Ministers (Nick Clegg, Nicky Morgan and David Miliband) standing in a rice factory in Essex – a Tilda rice factory, in case you missed the huge banner, in a product placement more outstanding than the massive cups of Pepsi the US X Factor judges have to drink from. |
| Tilda rice: it sounds like a public school prefect, or every woman to ever appear on Made in Chelsea, but is actually a popular basmati. The company needs all the help it can get, though, given that it was chosen as the perfect example of a business that would be horrifically affected by Brexit, with its Essex plant under threat. And this is what this event was all about, with Miliband saying that Brexit was “holding the country to ransom”, and that Britain would be impoverished if it left the customs union and single market. | Tilda rice: it sounds like a public school prefect, or every woman to ever appear on Made in Chelsea, but is actually a popular basmati. The company needs all the help it can get, though, given that it was chosen as the perfect example of a business that would be horrifically affected by Brexit, with its Essex plant under threat. And this is what this event was all about, with Miliband saying that Brexit was “holding the country to ransom”, and that Britain would be impoverished if it left the customs union and single market. |
| Morgan, Miliband and Clegg launch cross-party campaign on Brexit bill | Morgan, Miliband and Clegg launch cross-party campaign on Brexit bill |
| He’s not wrong. Nor is Morgan, who said that the government – from which she was brutally excised once Theresa May became prime minister (but got her revenge when she dissed those leather trousers) – had “no idea what the cost will be for business and people in this country”. The tests of Brexit, it seems, must be fundamentally re-thought. Or, as Morgan once said of exams when she was education secretary, “re-sitted”. | He’s not wrong. Nor is Morgan, who said that the government – from which she was brutally excised once Theresa May became prime minister (but got her revenge when she dissed those leather trousers) – had “no idea what the cost will be for business and people in this country”. The tests of Brexit, it seems, must be fundamentally re-thought. Or, as Morgan once said of exams when she was education secretary, “re-sitted”. |
| It’s not uncommon, of course, for politicians to give speeches in warehouses. They were the venue for virtually all May’s speeches during the last general election campaign. But those warehouses were mostly empty and cavernous. Sure, they all looked like the set of an old Spooks episode before someone is lashed to a chair and tortured, but at least she wasn’t hidden between Jenga-like stacks of rice bags. As my colleague said of today’s event: “I glanced at the picture and just thought it was a rice conference.” | It’s not uncommon, of course, for politicians to give speeches in warehouses. They were the venue for virtually all May’s speeches during the last general election campaign. But those warehouses were mostly empty and cavernous. Sure, they all looked like the set of an old Spooks episode before someone is lashed to a chair and tortured, but at least she wasn’t hidden between Jenga-like stacks of rice bags. As my colleague said of today’s event: “I glanced at the picture and just thought it was a rice conference.” |
| Clegg, Morgan and Miliband’s setup is also eerily similar to the press shots of families who live on flood plains and pile up sandbags before the storm hits. A special mention here too for Labour’s Tom Hamilton, who quipped: “More evidence that the leave vote was motivated by ricism.” | Clegg, Morgan and Miliband’s setup is also eerily similar to the press shots of families who live on flood plains and pile up sandbags before the storm hits. A special mention here too for Labour’s Tom Hamilton, who quipped: “More evidence that the leave vote was motivated by ricism.” |
| George Osborne used to be a big lover of factories, and hi-vis jackets, and awkwardly holding mugs of tea. But he never resembled three former reality television stars advertising carbohydrate products, because most of the time he was only vaguely aware of where he was and couldn’t wait to get out of there. | George Osborne used to be a big lover of factories, and hi-vis jackets, and awkwardly holding mugs of tea. But he never resembled three former reality television stars advertising carbohydrate products, because most of the time he was only vaguely aware of where he was and couldn’t wait to get out of there. |
| Tilda rice does however seem a good choice, given its ethical credentials referenced on its website, with sections dedicated to the Modern Slavery Act and its gender pay gap filings. It’s not like when Clegg and Ed Miliband wore “This is what a feminist looks like” T-shirts – only for the T-shirts to be allegedly made in a Mauritian sweatshop by women paid 62p an hour. | Tilda rice does however seem a good choice, given its ethical credentials referenced on its website, with sections dedicated to the Modern Slavery Act and its gender pay gap filings. It’s not like when Clegg and Ed Miliband wore “This is what a feminist looks like” T-shirts – only for the T-shirts to be allegedly made in a Mauritian sweatshop by women paid 62p an hour. |
| David Miliband is back – and mapping the only sane path towards Brexit | Simon Jenkins | David Miliband is back – and mapping the only sane path towards Brexit | Simon Jenkins |
| And Tilda rice is a proper British company, established in the 1970s in the UK. Brexiteers, remember, have been up in arms about our “iconic blue British passports” (the USA and 15 Caribbean countries have blue passports) being tendered to a French company, and fighting for them to be made by a company with the completely un-French name De La Rue, which partly originated in a venture co-founded with an Italian man who lived in Switzerland. | And Tilda rice is a proper British company, established in the 1970s in the UK. Brexiteers, remember, have been up in arms about our “iconic blue British passports” (the USA and 15 Caribbean countries have blue passports) being tendered to a French company, and fighting for them to be made by a company with the completely un-French name De La Rue, which partly originated in a venture co-founded with an Italian man who lived in Switzerland. |
| I am not sure of the government’s official position on rice, but I imagine at the moment it would be: if it’s white it can stay, if it’s brown send it back. Meanwhile, Jacob Rees-Mogg talks about how “uplifting” food banks are and May serves boiled potatoes and lasagne at Chequers. The unpalatable Brexit rolls on. We used to be lucky enough to get to pick and choose from the EU buffet – we had the best available deal – and now the government pretends we’ll get caviar, but all the evidence points towards being served slop. Food for thought. | I am not sure of the government’s official position on rice, but I imagine at the moment it would be: if it’s white it can stay, if it’s brown send it back. Meanwhile, Jacob Rees-Mogg talks about how “uplifting” food banks are and May serves boiled potatoes and lasagne at Chequers. The unpalatable Brexit rolls on. We used to be lucky enough to get to pick and choose from the EU buffet – we had the best available deal – and now the government pretends we’ll get caviar, but all the evidence points towards being served slop. Food for thought. |
| • Hannah Jane Parkinson is a Guardian columnist | • Hannah Jane Parkinson is a Guardian columnist |
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