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| What Middle-Class Families Want Politicians to Know | What Middle-Class Families Want Politicians to Know |
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| Being middle class in America used to come with a certain amount of leisure and economic security. Today, it involves an endless series of trade-offs and creative workarounds, career reinventions and an inescapable sense of dread. | Being middle class in America used to come with a certain amount of leisure and economic security. Today, it involves an endless series of trade-offs and creative workarounds, career reinventions and an inescapable sense of dread. |
| We asked readers to tell us what it’s like, and more than 500 people, with widely varied incomes, submitted responses. They described not just their financial worries, but the texture of daily life. Even those with very good incomes expressed fears of instability. They have seen their wages and bargaining power stagnate, and wealth spiral up to the top, while they struggle to acquire the markers of middle-class life — a college education, health care, the deed to a home. | We asked readers to tell us what it’s like, and more than 500 people, with widely varied incomes, submitted responses. They described not just their financial worries, but the texture of daily life. Even those with very good incomes expressed fears of instability. They have seen their wages and bargaining power stagnate, and wealth spiral up to the top, while they struggle to acquire the markers of middle-class life — a college education, health care, the deed to a home. |
| As one reader, Kristin DePue, put it, “There is an extraordinary burden on my generation to fund our own retirement and also afford college costs for our children.” Indeed, “middle-class life is now 30 percent more expensive than it was 20 years ago,” the journalist Alissa Quart writes in “Squeezed: Why Our Families Can’t Afford America.” And yet, for all the talk of “everyday Americans” among the presidential candidates, politicians do not seem to understand what it takes to get through the day, or what would really help. — E. Tammy Kim, contributing opinion writer | As one reader, Kristin DePue, put it, “There is an extraordinary burden on my generation to fund our own retirement and also afford college costs for our children.” Indeed, “middle-class life is now 30 percent more expensive than it was 20 years ago,” the journalist Alissa Quart writes in “Squeezed: Why Our Families Can’t Afford America.” And yet, for all the talk of “everyday Americans” among the presidential candidates, politicians do not seem to understand what it takes to get through the day, or what would really help. — E. Tammy Kim, contributing opinion writer |
| JESSICA WANG, Cupertino, Calif. | JESSICA WANG, Cupertino, Calif. |
| Marriage and family therapist. Lives with her husband, an executive assistant for a venture capitalist, and their son. Household income of $120,000-$200,000. | Marriage and family therapist. Lives with her husband, an executive assistant for a venture capitalist, and their son. Household income of $120,000-$200,000. |
| I work full time at a high school as a “student advocate” (mental health counselor) and have a private practice at night. My husband works as an executive assistant, and he is running for our local school board in the fall. | I work full time at a high school as a “student advocate” (mental health counselor) and have a private practice at night. My husband works as an executive assistant, and he is running for our local school board in the fall. |
| Although we make over $150,000 a year, we are lower middle class in the San Francisco Bay Area. We cannot buy a home here, our cars are both over 10 years old, and we don’t eat out more than a couple of times per month. We have a college fund for our son, but no real savings. | Although we make over $150,000 a year, we are lower middle class in the San Francisco Bay Area. We cannot buy a home here, our cars are both over 10 years old, and we don’t eat out more than a couple of times per month. We have a college fund for our son, but no real savings. |
| I live in Apple’s hometown, but that campus is completely walled off to us. There was a proposal to build some affordable housing units for teachers, but the community didn’t want that. There was another proposal for housing at an empty mall, but the community didn’t want that either. | I live in Apple’s hometown, but that campus is completely walled off to us. There was a proposal to build some affordable housing units for teachers, but the community didn’t want that. There was another proposal for housing at an empty mall, but the community didn’t want that either. |
| My son’s school has benefited from the property tax money, but I can see the makeup of the student body shifting. It’s becoming more and more affluent. | My son’s school has benefited from the property tax money, but I can see the makeup of the student body shifting. It’s becoming more and more affluent. |
| Our landlord put in a provision in his will that his children couldn’t sell the property for five years after his death. So we’re living there on borrowed time. We have about one and a half years left. And then we’re not sure where we’ll go. We try to be ideal tenants. There’s a fear and tension that we live with every day. We’re in a precarious position. | Our landlord put in a provision in his will that his children couldn’t sell the property for five years after his death. So we’re living there on borrowed time. We have about one and a half years left. And then we’re not sure where we’ll go. We try to be ideal tenants. There’s a fear and tension that we live with every day. We’re in a precarious position. |
| DANIEL LYNCH, Stow, Mass. | DANIEL LYNCH, Stow, Mass. |
| User experience/user interface designer at a technology company. Lives with his wife, a stay-at-home mother, and their teenage daughter. Household income of $120,000-$200,000. | User experience/user interface designer at a technology company. Lives with his wife, a stay-at-home mother, and their teenage daughter. Household income of $120,000-$200,000. |
| I work in the tech industry, and I’ve worked for 17 different companies so far. I did O.K. Some failed, some did well, I had equity in some. That’s par for the course. If you’re in high tech, you’re riding a bronco. | I work in the tech industry, and I’ve worked for 17 different companies so far. I did O.K. Some failed, some did well, I had equity in some. That’s par for the course. If you’re in high tech, you’re riding a bronco. |
| I am a master of my trade now, but who am I kidding? Tech is a youth-oriented culture. Some bean counter will catch up to me sooner or later. I’ve lived through enough cycles of boom and bust to know that there’s another one coming. The millennials I work with, they’re looking down the barrel of 40. They feel a lot of pressure. | I am a master of my trade now, but who am I kidding? Tech is a youth-oriented culture. Some bean counter will catch up to me sooner or later. I’ve lived through enough cycles of boom and bust to know that there’s another one coming. The millennials I work with, they’re looking down the barrel of 40. They feel a lot of pressure. |
| I can see that there are two kinds of young people: the ones who have student-loan debt and those that don’t. It’s the ones who don’t who are buying condos now, who are getting married. And I want my child to be one of the lucky ones. I am hellbent that my daughter will not start out with a millstone around her neck. | I can see that there are two kinds of young people: the ones who have student-loan debt and those that don’t. It’s the ones who don’t who are buying condos now, who are getting married. And I want my child to be one of the lucky ones. I am hellbent that my daughter will not start out with a millstone around her neck. |
| We have not saved as much as we should have for retirement, in order to save for our daughter’s college, in four years. We are determined to not have our daughter start out life with college debt. We might be mistakenly sacrificing retirement to accomplish that goal. It’s a bet that we’re making. My parents are elderly, and unless they have expensive end-of-life issues, I am likely to inherit something that will help make up the loss out of our daughter’s 529 college fund. But I’ve got to work until I’m at least 70 to make all this work. | We have not saved as much as we should have for retirement, in order to save for our daughter’s college, in four years. We are determined to not have our daughter start out life with college debt. We might be mistakenly sacrificing retirement to accomplish that goal. It’s a bet that we’re making. My parents are elderly, and unless they have expensive end-of-life issues, I am likely to inherit something that will help make up the loss out of our daughter’s 529 college fund. But I’ve got to work until I’m at least 70 to make all this work. |
| I don’t have a lot of understanding for people who are not willing to change fields, to move from the place they know to feed their families. But to make mobility possible, we need something like a “Renewed Deal.” We need national health care and some sort of universal basic income. If the only viable work is short-term contracts, then we need the social infrastructure to make that possible. | I don’t have a lot of understanding for people who are not willing to change fields, to move from the place they know to feed their families. But to make mobility possible, we need something like a “Renewed Deal.” We need national health care and some sort of universal basic income. If the only viable work is short-term contracts, then we need the social infrastructure to make that possible. |
| You save like crazy when you can, but there will always be spaces in between. The baseline should not be homelessness. There needs to be something that covers the bases between gigs. | You save like crazy when you can, but there will always be spaces in between. The baseline should not be homelessness. There needs to be something that covers the bases between gigs. |
| Colleges need to be more affordable. The harsh terms of college loans and the insane cost of college feels like a scam that is undermining the benefits of higher education. Every dollar that I have earned is through capitalism, but there needs to be something more to make this work. | Colleges need to be more affordable. The harsh terms of college loans and the insane cost of college feels like a scam that is undermining the benefits of higher education. Every dollar that I have earned is through capitalism, but there needs to be something more to make this work. |
| KRISTIN DePUE, Wyomissing, Penn. | KRISTIN DePUE, Wyomissing, Penn. |
| Sales representative for a medical supply and device company. Lives with her two teenage sons, whom she supports with her ex-husband, an emergency room doctor. Household income of $200,000-$400,000. | Sales representative for a medical supply and device company. Lives with her two teenage sons, whom she supports with her ex-husband, an emergency room doctor. Household income of $200,000-$400,000. |
| There is an extraordinary burden on my generation to fund our own retirement and also afford college costs for our children. It’s almost guaranteeing that we won’t retire at the same comfort level as our parents, if we can retire at all. | There is an extraordinary burden on my generation to fund our own retirement and also afford college costs for our children. It’s almost guaranteeing that we won’t retire at the same comfort level as our parents, if we can retire at all. |
| My mother was a nurse, my father was a carpenter. My parents had less work and less hours at work. My parents had pensions and early retirement packages, plus affordable health care. They didn’t have to save for a lifetime to send us to college. | My mother was a nurse, my father was a carpenter. My parents had less work and less hours at work. My parents had pensions and early retirement packages, plus affordable health care. They didn’t have to save for a lifetime to send us to college. |
| I live well, day to day. I’m fortunate, but I feel stress daily to constantly save money. I shop for groceries in the least expensive places: I know where I can get decent meat and vegetables, still organic, but close to the expiration date so I can buy it at a discount. Sometimes, I’ll stop myself. I think about how much money my ex-husband and I make, and I think, “Why am I in this position?” | I live well, day to day. I’m fortunate, but I feel stress daily to constantly save money. I shop for groceries in the least expensive places: I know where I can get decent meat and vegetables, still organic, but close to the expiration date so I can buy it at a discount. Sometimes, I’ll stop myself. I think about how much money my ex-husband and I make, and I think, “Why am I in this position?” |
| My sons’ college savings is my largest expense after my mortgage. I’ve been automatically saving for that from my paycheck since my kids were born. You would think that by now, I’d feel comfortable that I’ve saved enough. But now I realize I may have to choose between paying for college and having enough to live on in retirement. | My sons’ college savings is my largest expense after my mortgage. I’ve been automatically saving for that from my paycheck since my kids were born. You would think that by now, I’d feel comfortable that I’ve saved enough. But now I realize I may have to choose between paying for college and having enough to live on in retirement. |
| Employers used to bear a lot more of the burden of supporting families, with good, inexpensive health insurance and pension plans. Companies need to reassess their relationship to their employees. Something went wrong there, and that’s having a huge impact on society. | Employers used to bear a lot more of the burden of supporting families, with good, inexpensive health insurance and pension plans. Companies need to reassess their relationship to their employees. Something went wrong there, and that’s having a huge impact on society. |
| CAITLIN DUNHAM, Austin, Minn. | CAITLIN DUNHAM, Austin, Minn. |
| Physician. Lives with her husband, a software engineer and entrepreneur, and their two children. Household income of $200,000-$400,000. | Physician. Lives with her husband, a software engineer and entrepreneur, and their two children. Household income of $200,000-$400,000. |
| I live in a small town in Minnesota, and our income puts us in the top 2 percent here. But a physician is expected to work 36 hours at a time and take on massive debt. My husband has his own business. But in the gig economy, he has to write good code, run the business and recruit clients. | I live in a small town in Minnesota, and our income puts us in the top 2 percent here. But a physician is expected to work 36 hours at a time and take on massive debt. My husband has his own business. But in the gig economy, he has to write good code, run the business and recruit clients. |
| Each of us lives in constant terror of falling asleep in a chair or behind the wheel or at the operating table and causing harm to someone or having something awful happen to our children because we couldn’t physically stay awake. Affordable education and shorter work hours would help us a lot. | Each of us lives in constant terror of falling asleep in a chair or behind the wheel or at the operating table and causing harm to someone or having something awful happen to our children because we couldn’t physically stay awake. Affordable education and shorter work hours would help us a lot. |
| We don’t lack money; we are solidly upper middle to upper class income-wise, but time to take care of everything is in comically short supply. It’s less about material goods than about security and reliability. On paper we make lots of money, but education debt, taxes, child care and putting aside adequate retirement savings means that we drive old cars and buy clothes at thrift stores. | We don’t lack money; we are solidly upper middle to upper class income-wise, but time to take care of everything is in comically short supply. It’s less about material goods than about security and reliability. On paper we make lots of money, but education debt, taxes, child care and putting aside adequate retirement savings means that we drive old cars and buy clothes at thrift stores. |
| I knew that as a doctor I would make a good income. But people don’t realize how many hours I have to work to have that income. I am 10 years behind my peers in savings. During medical school, you are working for free. During residency, you are working for minimum wage. I don’t have the kind of savings that people I went to college with have at my age. | I knew that as a doctor I would make a good income. But people don’t realize how many hours I have to work to have that income. I am 10 years behind my peers in savings. During medical school, you are working for free. During residency, you are working for minimum wage. I don’t have the kind of savings that people I went to college with have at my age. |
| I am spending $91,000 on day care, and on household help. There are months when I will look at our expenses, our student loans and the enormous child care bills that allow me to work 85 hours a week and realize that we don’t quite have enough left over for our mortgage. Child care exceeds my house payment. It’s almost as much as mortgage and student loans combined. Those are the two biggest things that would help — access to child care and paid parental leave — because people are spending so much just to have a child. | I am spending $91,000 on day care, and on household help. There are months when I will look at our expenses, our student loans and the enormous child care bills that allow me to work 85 hours a week and realize that we don’t quite have enough left over for our mortgage. Child care exceeds my house payment. It’s almost as much as mortgage and student loans combined. Those are the two biggest things that would help — access to child care and paid parental leave — because people are spending so much just to have a child. |
| VICTOR GOMEZ, Auburn, Ga. | VICTOR GOMEZ, Auburn, Ga. |
| Runs a nonprofit housing-development agency. Lives with his elderly mother. Supports two teenage children with his ex-wife. Household income of $75,000-$100,000. | Runs a nonprofit housing-development agency. Lives with his elderly mother. Supports two teenage children with his ex-wife. Household income of $75,000-$100,000. |
| I’ve been working in Georgia for the past 22 years. I set up my own nonprofit housing-development agency: L.B.P. (Lord Be Praised) Consortium. I like the entrepreneurial life. I see myself and the way God has fashioned my life as being worthy of praise. I get to work when I want to. I get to work how I want to. I always reinvent myself. My agency is certified to test homes for green-building certification, real estate appraisals and weatherization. I’m always working. When appraisals get slower, I jump out there. I go find houses to fix and sell. | I’ve been working in Georgia for the past 22 years. I set up my own nonprofit housing-development agency: L.B.P. (Lord Be Praised) Consortium. I like the entrepreneurial life. I see myself and the way God has fashioned my life as being worthy of praise. I get to work when I want to. I get to work how I want to. I always reinvent myself. My agency is certified to test homes for green-building certification, real estate appraisals and weatherization. I’m always working. When appraisals get slower, I jump out there. I go find houses to fix and sell. |
| Everything was going well before the divorce, in 2011. I had all kinds of expenses and lawyers. That depleted whatever I’d been saving. | Everything was going well before the divorce, in 2011. I had all kinds of expenses and lawyers. That depleted whatever I’d been saving. |
| I have two children, and both of them have autism. That’s another challenge. Even though both of my children are almost grown, I support both of them. I have no choice. Health care for my children is anywhere from $12,000 to $40,000 per year, depending on what we have to deal with, even though most of it is covered by insurance. There’s physical therapy, speech therapy, and going to the hospital if they ate something and don’t know what it is and are having a reaction. | |
| So now I’m saving toward retirement, but I know I’m going to have to work until I’m 80. | So now I’m saving toward retirement, but I know I’m going to have to work until I’m 80. |
| FLETCHER GUSTAFSON, Kansas City, Mo. | FLETCHER GUSTAFSON, Kansas City, Mo. |
| Sales representative for a trucking company. Lives with his wife, a human resources manager, and their two sons. Household income of $120,000-$200,000. | Sales representative for a trucking company. Lives with his wife, a human resources manager, and their two sons. Household income of $120,000-$200,000. |
| We’ve been here for more than a year, since March 2018. It was a combination of things that finally pushed us to leave the Bay Area. Grandparents who watch the baby; a school district that offers full-day kindergarten; another grandparent who picks the older boy up from the bus stop and watches him in the afternoon. We had none of that in the Bay. Child care alone would have cost us more than $2,000 per month. Rent in a decent neighborhood, another $2,500 or more. We made $150,000 as a household, and still couldn’t get the math to work. So now we’re Midwesterners. | We’ve been here for more than a year, since March 2018. It was a combination of things that finally pushed us to leave the Bay Area. Grandparents who watch the baby; a school district that offers full-day kindergarten; another grandparent who picks the older boy up from the bus stop and watches him in the afternoon. We had none of that in the Bay. Child care alone would have cost us more than $2,000 per month. Rent in a decent neighborhood, another $2,500 or more. We made $150,000 as a household, and still couldn’t get the math to work. So now we’re Midwesterners. |
| We dig Kansas City, but there are real trade-offs. I love the West Coast, the diversity and variety of life there, and at times I feel isolated in the Midwest. I’m the closet heathen in my new company. Management is devoutly Christian, and I’m afraid of saying or doing anything that might rock the boat. | We dig Kansas City, but there are real trade-offs. I love the West Coast, the diversity and variety of life there, and at times I feel isolated in the Midwest. I’m the closet heathen in my new company. Management is devoutly Christian, and I’m afraid of saying or doing anything that might rock the boat. |
| My father is on the West Coast, and has dementia and Parkinson’s, and I can’t be there to help care for him. I understand not wanting to leave everything you’ve ever known. Part of me feels bad for people like that. Part of me says suck it up, learn to survive, or don’t. I did it, and it’s not bad. | My father is on the West Coast, and has dementia and Parkinson’s, and I can’t be there to help care for him. I understand not wanting to leave everything you’ve ever known. Part of me feels bad for people like that. Part of me says suck it up, learn to survive, or don’t. I did it, and it’s not bad. |
| IRAN SANCHEZ, Laveen, Ariz. | IRAN SANCHEZ, Laveen, Ariz. |
| Trains call-center workers for a department store. Lives with her daughter; her ex-husband, a systems engineer; his wife, a probation officer; and their two children. Household income of $120,000-$200,000. | Trains call-center workers for a department store. Lives with her daughter; her ex-husband, a systems engineer; his wife, a probation officer; and their two children. Household income of $120,000-$200,000. |
| When I started my new position, I went from making $60,000 a year to making $52,000. It’s been an adjustment, for sure. Even to stay in the house I was living in, it was going to be tight. I would need a roommate. So when my ex-husband and his wife, Xavier and Alex, proposed, ‘Do you want to live with us?’ it made sense. I would be able to be with my daughter much more. And this gave me a chance to catch up on all the debt, the credit cards I owed. We have a combined family, a blended family. It’s a village. We all take care of each other. | When I started my new position, I went from making $60,000 a year to making $52,000. It’s been an adjustment, for sure. Even to stay in the house I was living in, it was going to be tight. I would need a roommate. So when my ex-husband and his wife, Xavier and Alex, proposed, ‘Do you want to live with us?’ it made sense. I would be able to be with my daughter much more. And this gave me a chance to catch up on all the debt, the credit cards I owed. We have a combined family, a blended family. It’s a village. We all take care of each other. |
| I’ve had to scale back, mostly on entertainment, going out — none of that. Dinners, too — I’m eating at home a lot. Now I’m putting more into my 401(k) and educational account for the kids. | I’ve had to scale back, mostly on entertainment, going out — none of that. Dinners, too — I’m eating at home a lot. Now I’m putting more into my 401(k) and educational account for the kids. |
| My schedule is really crazy. It’s technically a retail job because I’m training people to do over-the-phone retail, so there’s times my classes start at 7 and end at 3, and then sometimes back to back, 11 to 7. And because we’re a call center and it’s a 24-hour cycle of work time, they want us to work as close as possible to the call-center shifts. If I lived on my own, not close to Xavier and Alex, I would have had to find something else. Because I don’t have a normal job with normal hours, I’d have to pay extra for child care. | My schedule is really crazy. It’s technically a retail job because I’m training people to do over-the-phone retail, so there’s times my classes start at 7 and end at 3, and then sometimes back to back, 11 to 7. And because we’re a call center and it’s a 24-hour cycle of work time, they want us to work as close as possible to the call-center shifts. If I lived on my own, not close to Xavier and Alex, I would have had to find something else. Because I don’t have a normal job with normal hours, I’d have to pay extra for child care. |
| I feel middle class, in the sense that I’ve been able to do a lot of things my parents couldn’t: being able to travel, being able to enjoy vacation. My parents never had that. At my daughter’s age, and I tell her this all the time, we, my brother and I, had to take a paper route. It wasn’t because we wanted our own money; it’s because we had to contribute to rent. We had to pay the phone or light bill because we’d get overdue notices or notices that they’d cut the utility. | I feel middle class, in the sense that I’ve been able to do a lot of things my parents couldn’t: being able to travel, being able to enjoy vacation. My parents never had that. At my daughter’s age, and I tell her this all the time, we, my brother and I, had to take a paper route. It wasn’t because we wanted our own money; it’s because we had to contribute to rent. We had to pay the phone or light bill because we’d get overdue notices or notices that they’d cut the utility. |
| That right there, the sense of almost having to leave, of your home being in peril, of not making the mortgage or losing power or eating just bean tacos for the rest of the week — my daughter now, she has no worry in the world. She’ll never know the feeling of growing up that way. | That right there, the sense of almost having to leave, of your home being in peril, of not making the mortgage or losing power or eating just bean tacos for the rest of the week — my daughter now, she has no worry in the world. She’ll never know the feeling of growing up that way. |
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