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Late Night Is Pretty Sure Who Changed That Hurricane Map With a Sharpie Late Night Is Pretty Sure Who Changed That Hurricane Map With a Sharpie
(about 7 hours later)
Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. If you’re interested in hearing from The Times regularly about great TV, sign up for our Watching newsletter and get recommendations straight to your inbox.Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. If you’re interested in hearing from The Times regularly about great TV, sign up for our Watching newsletter and get recommendations straight to your inbox.
At the White House on Wednesday, President Trump displayed a map of Hurricane Dorian’s potential path that someone had extended to Alabama with a black pen. Mr. Trump, who’d mistakenly tweeted Sunday that the storm might hit the state, said he didn’t know who had done it, but the late-night hosts seemed fairly certain.At the White House on Wednesday, President Trump displayed a map of Hurricane Dorian’s potential path that someone had extended to Alabama with a black pen. Mr. Trump, who’d mistakenly tweeted Sunday that the storm might hit the state, said he didn’t know who had done it, but the late-night hosts seemed fairly certain.
“I mean, don’t get me wrong — I'm impressed that Trump can locate Alabama on a map. But still, the president of the United States just changed the map with a Sharpie to make himself look right.” — TREVOR NOAH“I mean, don’t get me wrong — I'm impressed that Trump can locate Alabama on a map. But still, the president of the United States just changed the map with a Sharpie to make himself look right.” — TREVOR NOAH
“Because of the fact that the president misrepresented where the water would go, I’m calling this scandal ‘Water-gate.’ Trademark.” — STEPHEN COLBERT“Because of the fact that the president misrepresented where the water would go, I’m calling this scandal ‘Water-gate.’ Trademark.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“It must be so easy to play poker with this guy. [As Trump:] ‘Let me just see what I’ve got here. Let me see. I don’t, I don’t know. I don’t know. I do not — I do not have three queens. I do not have — I do not have three queens. Or, if anyone has a Sharpie, I do not have four queens.” — STEPHEN COLBERT “It must be so easy to play poker with this guy. [As Trump:] ‘Let me just see what I’ve got here. Let me see. I don’t, I don’t know. I don’t know. I do not — I do not have three queens. I do not have — I do not have three queens. Or, if anyone has a Sharpie, I do not have four queens.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“I mean, after this, I have to wonder if his high school report card was legit.” — SETH MEYERS“I mean, after this, I have to wonder if his high school report card was legit.” — SETH MEYERS
“That’s right — he’s not even trying to hide the lies anymore. Not only do we have fake news, we now have fake weather, too. I’m hoping we get fake sports, because I want to see the Mets win the World Series.” — JIMMY KIMMEL“That’s right — he’s not even trying to hide the lies anymore. Not only do we have fake news, we now have fake weather, too. I’m hoping we get fake sports, because I want to see the Mets win the World Series.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“But he really must think we’re a bunch of idiots. I bet he thinks, ‘Hey, they elected me president — let’s see what other dumb crap they’ll go for.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL“But he really must think we’re a bunch of idiots. I bet he thinks, ‘Hey, they elected me president — let’s see what other dumb crap they’ll go for.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“According to a new poll, former Vice President Joe Biden leads President Trump by nine points in Wisconsin. And when Trump heard that, he updated the hurricane map again.” — SETH MEYERS“According to a new poll, former Vice President Joe Biden leads President Trump by nine points in Wisconsin. And when Trump heard that, he updated the hurricane map again.” — SETH MEYERS
The “Daily Show” correspondent Jaboukie Young-White says the way to control gun violence is to make guns less heterosexual.The “Daily Show” correspondent Jaboukie Young-White says the way to control gun violence is to make guns less heterosexual.
Kirsten Dunst will chat with Jimmy Kimmel about her new Showtime comedy, “On Becoming a God in Central Florida.”Kirsten Dunst will chat with Jimmy Kimmel about her new Showtime comedy, “On Becoming a God in Central Florida.”
Chanel Miller stayed anonymous throughout the trial of Brock Turner, the Stanford University swimmer who was found guilty of sexually assaulting her. Now, she’s coming forward with her story in a memoir, “Know My Name.”Chanel Miller stayed anonymous throughout the trial of Brock Turner, the Stanford University swimmer who was found guilty of sexually assaulting her. Now, she’s coming forward with her story in a memoir, “Know My Name.”