He Spent 14 Years in Foster Care. Now He Hopes to Inspire Others.
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Version 0 of 1. Alexander Santana has wanted to be on his own since he was a child. He entered New York City’s foster care system when he was 5. By the time he was 10, he said, he had been starved in one of his foster homes, an ordeal that made it difficult for him to trust his guardians. That’s when he and an older brother, who had been living in the same home, made a decision: Instead of relying on others, they would be each other’s keepers. “I just felt like I had to be the adult,” Mr. Santana said. For 14 years, he cycled through at least seven homes — he lost count — in the Bronx, Manhattan, Staten Island and on Long Island. He would fall asleep clinging to one of his mother’s shirts because, he said, its scent reminded him of home. For most of his childhood, Mr. Santana kept his experiences in the foster system largely to himself. The last thing he wanted was for people to pity him or to treat him differently. Now 19, Mr. Santana isn’t ashamed of his upbringing. In fact, he wants to draw from his experiences to inspire other children who are floundering. But he reached that point only after years of resentment and therapy to work through his feelings of abandonment. Questions had nagged at him: “Why am I still in foster care?” he recalled thinking. “I didn’t do anything to deserve this.” At 17, Mr. Santana dropped out of high school. He had been having a tough time in his foster homes and had lost the ambition to work or study. “I didn’t want to do anything,” he said. “I was being very stubborn.” He seethed with resentment. After years of therapy and trying without success to address his feelings with his biological family, Mr. Santana said he went from being “soft and warmhearted” to cold, angry and numb. He distanced himself from his family, except for his older brother, who he says is his best friend. “We took this journey together,” he said. “He knows the pain that I’ve been through.” A former case worker of Mr. Santana’s still checked on him regularly. After he dropped out of school, she spoke with him candidly, stressing that he needed to make some changes. “She was just always, I guess you could say, that little angel on the shoulder,” he said. Her advice: “Get your life together. You got this.” Not long after, he began meeting with mentors and coaches at the Next Generation Center, a program in the Bronx administered by Children’s Aid, one of the seven organizations supported by The New York Times Neediest Cases Fund. His conversations with them motivated Mr. Santana to refocus. He learned about a job training program, which led to an internship with a nonprofit that runs arts programs in low-income neighborhoods. This year, Mr. Santana has explored opportunities to speak out about his time in foster care. He met with advocates campaigning for funding to support young people as they age out of foster care, and as part of that effort, spoke to reporters at a rally in the Bronx about how his mentors had helped him prepare for life outside the system. He also participated in an annual event organized by the Fostering Youth Success Alliance, a Children’s Aid program that allows students to shadow a New York City Council member. Mr. Santana seized the opportunity with Barry Grodenchik, a councilman from Queens, to share observations about the foster system. “I want to get my story out,” Mr. Santana said. “I want to help kids who go through my situation.” Recalling his experiences, he added, “I don’t want kids to be afraid to speak up for themselves.” Weeks later, Youth Villages, an organization devoted to child welfare, invited Mr. Santana to join a panel discussion at an event in Washington, where he spoke to more than 50 researchers, policy advisers and agency leaders about the difference a supportive case worker can make. Once Mr. Santana had those achievements under his belt, his coach at Children’s Aid helped him apply for subsidized housing. In July, he settled into his own studio apartment in Washington Heights. “Two months before I moved here, I was nervous,” Mr. Santana said. Foster care was all he knew; all of a sudden, he had to acclimate to independence. Children’s Aid used Neediest Cases funds to buy $850 in gift cards — one from the supermarket Stop & Shop, another from Target — that Mr. Santana used to buy groceries, sheets, towels and a white faux-fur rug. He hopes to spruce the place up and add artwork to the bare walls. The Administration for Children’s Services also gave him a discharge grant of roughly $500. Every two weeks he receives about $191 in food stamps and nearly $90 in cash assistance. In July he enrolled in the city’s Summer Youth Employment Program, which helped him land a marketing internship with a start-up company that distributes biodegradable food storage containers. That job wrapped up in August. He is now participating in YouthPathways, a professional training program run by the city, and is focused on studying to earn his high school equivalency diploma. After that, he hopes to enroll in college to study psychology as he continues working. Sometimes, he said, he sits alone in his apartment and ruminates on his new life. A few items on his dresser are sources of comfort: a plaque he received for his advocacy work, photographs of his former foster brothers, a flat-screen television that a foster mother gave him. “It’s like a reflection of my life, from where I’ve started to where I’ve been,” he said. “Everything is happening so fast, but it’s at a good pace as well. It’s just great.” Donations to the Neediest Cases may be made online, or with a check or over the phone. |