Self-isolating with kids? There's plenty more to do than watch TV

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/mar/24/self-isolating-kids-tv

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From digging a hole to rearranging the cupboards, here are some novel ways to keep youngsters occupied at home, says journalist Nell Frizell

When your child’s idea of a good time is licking bus windows, throwing toothbrushes in the toilet or seeing how far they can sneeze, little words like “contagious” and “virus” can take on a rather urgent tang. And yet, as schools closed on Friday, how are parents supposed to cope? Presumably we’re all going to be here for some time and there’s really only so much Peppa Pig a human can watch before turning into a living Goya painting. So here, with a little help from my Twitter friends, are just a few pointers.

First, you don’t have to be an expert in medieval history or thermodynamics to keep your child learning during a period of self-isolation. You can use clocks, watches and timers, for example, to learn about time. Similarly, you can use cake, pizza and oranges to learn about fractions (if, for any reason, you want to eat less than an entire cake or pizza in one sitting, something I am not prone to). You can also use daily activities such as timing a meal or fitting tupperware into a cupboard to practise quantities, spatial awareness and child labour. As an important side note, I had no idea until I had a small child quite how much they love cupboards and admin.

Keep reading. Unlike that other indoor activity that your mother told you would send you blind, you literally cannot do too much reading. If you want to go all out and turn the book into a play, or build the characters out of plasticine, or draw your own illustrations, then, well, all power to you and your elbow.

If you are lucky enough to have a garden, now may be the time to get into den-building, tent-pitching, picnicking, birdfeeder-making (out of old tins and seeds), minibeast hunting, gardening and – if all else fails – dig a really, really impressive hole. Damn it, if you have a big enough spade, you could probably build an Anderson shelter out there to fill with the survival essentials: plasticine, old spoons, bath toys and a poster of Thomas the Tank Engine. This may also be a good springtime opportunity for pressing flowers in big books, growing a moss garden, searching for “fossils” or “dinosaur teeth” (in our case, this is any old bit of stone or broken brick), making a leaf book and collecting sticks. It beats singing Baby Shark on repeat. Just.

Once the lockdown hits and we’re in here for the long haul, feel free to indulge your inner children’s TV presenter. Make papier-mache masks over balloons. Make papier-mache tea sets and have a pretend picnic. Hell, make papier-mache anything – we’re going to be here for a while. Try a spot of potato-printing (if you’re not stockpiling potatoes) with poster paint. If you live in a house with stairs: try rolling the ball down the stairs, “tobogganing” down them in sleeping bags, “rock climbing” up stairs using only your arms, jumping off lower stairs on to a cushion crash mat. Hide toys – in a tray full of rice, lentils or any other dried food you’re going to boil afterwards anyway; or around the house; in shaving foam on a plate – at the end of a trail set out in a treasure map. Maybe plan a party (needless to say just for those you live with) – Lithuania’s Independence Day? Woohoo! Get drawing those flags! Google traditional food! Learn the country’s motto. If you want to stay on the pandemic theme, you can even make your own soap (if you can find somewhere to sell you lye). The internet is awash with recipes.

If you’re really about to crawl up the walls, try @fiveminutemum on Instagram for more ideas, or @CosmicKidsYoga on YouTube for some guilt-free screen time and a bit of bending.

When all else fails, try a very very long game of sleeping lions. As in, 45 minutes per round. Make those little squirts sleep until June.

• Nell Frizzell is a journalist