Trevor Elliott: We can't stop caring for children because of Covid
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Version 1 of 2. The former footballer-turned youth worker on how he became a foster carer aged 25 and set up a children’s home during the pandemic Growing up on a south London estate in the early 2000s, Trevor Elliott believed there were just four ways his future was likely to pan out: drugs, prison, gangs or crime. Little did he know that by the age of 25, he would become one of the UK’s youngest foster carers – far below the average age of 45 to 54 – and that just four years later, he would win an MBE for his services to vulnerable children. “Fostering is the best thing I’ve ever done,” says Elliott, now 29. “It’s made me see children differently. I got tough love growing up, but fostering has made me see that the one thing kids need is love – pure love, without judgment.” As a teen, football was Elliott’s only solace. School was academically difficult: friends were carrying knives. Life at home, where his single mother was raising five children on benefits, wasn’t easy, either. “There was nothing for us where we lived: no affordable football clubs, no after-school programmes,” says Elliott. “It was all about postcode rivalry: you couldn’t go left because there would be a gang from another estate. Football allowed me to escape all that. It allowed me to not be another statistic. It got me out of a lot of trouble.” After talks to pursue a professional football career broke down, Elliott decided to invest in his community instead. At 19, using funds from his work as a sports coach (as well as donations), he co-founded Lambeth Action for Youth with a friend. The not-for-profit social inclusion project, aimed at diverting children away from gang-related violence, included a football club offering coaching to young people, as well as the only youth club within Streatham village. The clubs were so popular – and so busy – that Elliott realised there was an even bigger need than he’d realised. “We had 70 kids attending per day – it was extraordinary,” says Elliott. “But I was struggling with the fact that these kids would come to the football academy or youth club and be inspired to focus on their CV or work on their game, then go home to their same messy home environment. The next day, it was like they’d been reset to zero, saying things like, ‘My mum doesn’t believe in me being a footballer or an architect.’ So I started looking into the care sector to see how I could do more.” While running Lambeth Action for Youth in his spare time, Elliott worked as an estate agent for five years and saved enough money to buy his own three-bed house. He then approached a number of local authorities to discuss fostering. “I was only 24, and they said no, because I had no experience [with fostering],” says Elliott. “But I obviously had experience with kids: at the time I had 10 siblings between my mum and my dad and eight nieces and nephews. Luckily, Camden council in north London saw what I was trying to do and approved me to foster at 25.” Within two weeks, Elliott had taken on two teen boys on short-term placements (they ended up staying long term, he says, because of the progress they made). Just a few months on, he took on another teenager, and a fourth child was visiting on weekends for respite care. One of the foster children was an unaccompanied asylum seeker who had fled his native country at 14. He barely spoke English and had no friends or family here. At first, Elliott was overwhelmed by the enormity of the situation. “That first day, when I picked him up from the children’s home and brought him here, I was in tears. It hit me that he was my responsibility. Out of all the things I’d done in my life, I’d never been responsible for someone else’s child – let alone one who didn’t speak English. It was difficult. Now, he can speak English really well, he’s passed his GCSEs and driving licence, he’s gone to college and is studying car mechanics, and he’s got a job. He’s done amazing.” The other two foster children have done equally well, says Elliott. All three teenagers are still living with him but in a second, larger house in semi-independent and fully independent living, which means that, aged 16 and older, they are making many of their own decisions about their lives. “Being in care, the statistics of going to college and passing your GCSEs or going to uni are very slim,” says Elliott. “The one thing I tell my kids is that they have my full support for whatever they want to do, but they have to learn and be educated. I may not be in their lives forever, so it’s important that they have their qualifications.” Earlier this year, Elliott took on another challenge and converted his first three-bed house into an Ofsted-registered residential care home for children who have experienced extreme trauma and disadvantages. Ladywell Children’s Home opened its doors in March, just as Covid-19 was forcing many other care homes to freeze their intake of new arrivals. Two highly vulnerable children, aged 14 and 15, now live there with full-time staff; although their care is reviewed every six months, Elliott expects them to stay until they are 18. Statistics show that Elliott’s decision was an unusual one. Covid-19 saw roughly half of the UK’s private children’s homes refuse to take on new referrals; meanwhile, the number of children needing foster care rose 44%, yet the number of potential foster carers fell by half. “Schools were closed and schools are often the best thing for a child in care because it lets them escape [home] abuse. So I said we have to take kids in,” explains Elliott. “We couldn’t not take referrals just because of Covid. I’d rather catch Covid with children in my care than catch Covid at home alone.” Various experts have spoken out in recent months concerning shortcomings in the care system, which provides for more than 75,000 children in England. In June, the children’s charity Barnardo’s warned of a “state of emergency” as children who may have experienced abuse and neglect waited for placements with foster families. On Tuesday, the children’s commissioner for England, Anne Longfield, accused the care system of being a “bad parent”, failing thousands of vulnerable children by treating them “as a risk to be managed, not a life to be lived”. Longfield is calling for urgent reform and serious investment. Elliott, who last month received an MBE for his services to vulnerable children, particularly during Covid-19, agrees that “the care system is failing young people”. “Society, in general, is failing kids. We think that because we’re adults and they’re children that we know better, that we can make decisions without asking them their opinion,” he says. “The key is listening and creating a nurturing environment. It’s been really easy making children’s lives better. In my opinion, all we need to do is listen.” Next year, Elliott aims to open another residential care home, as well as serviced apartments in East Sussex for 16- to 19-year-olds as they transition into independence, through the Kennedy Elliott Partnership, an umbrella care and accommodation company he co-founded in 2018. He urges anyone with a “clean heart” to consider fostering, as despite popular myths, there are no criteria requiring foster carers to be in nuclear families or have children of their own. Millennials are particularly well-suited to caring for teens because they can relate to what they’re going through, Elliott believes. “Now, more than ever, is the time we need to be helping our kids. If you have a spare room, consider it. Ultimately, whatever’s going to happen with this virus or after, we’re either going to get through it together or on our own. And I don’t think anyone wants to get through challenging stuff on their own,” he says. “We can’t stop caring for children. We need to provide some normality. Everyone benefits.” Curriculum vitae Age: 29. Lives: London. Family: Partner, no children. Education: Dunraven School (Streatham), Amersham & Wycombe College (Wycombe Wanderers FC). Career: March 2020-present: residential home manager, Ladywell children’s home, Lewisham; 2018-present: managing director, Kennedy Elliott Partnership and youth mentor at Woodford Children; 2010-2020: project manager, Lambeth Action For Youth CIC; 2015-2017: senior sales negotiator, Kinleigh Folkard & Hayward; 2012-2015: senior sales negotiator, Townsends Estate Agents; 2010-2012: sports coach, Brentford FC Community Sports, and youth support worker at the London boroughs of Hounslow and Bromley; 2009-2012: sports coach, AFC Wimbledon; 2008-2011: sports coach at Welling United Football Club. Awards: MBE, October 2020; 24 Housing Tenant Champion award, 2015; Lambeth Champion award, 2013. Interests: Property, my Sunday league football team Lambeth All Stars (we recently won the London Cup), spending time with my family, travelling and going on holiday. |