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MTV movie awards 2012: nothing's shocking, still MTV movie awards 2012: nothing's shocking, still
(40 minutes later)
The 21st MTV movie awards aired Sunday night, and without actually having seen it, we feel as if we've seen it all before.The 21st MTV movie awards aired Sunday night, and without actually having seen it, we feel as if we've seen it all before.
Russell Brand was the host again and lobbed off easy jokes about Justin Bieber, Charlie Sheen (it's 2012, right?), Kanye West dating Kim Kardashian, and Michael Fassbender's member. Johnny Depp jumped the cool shark and jammed with the Black Keys. Mark Wahlberg sternly reprimanded a heckler who was mean to poor Mila Kunis, who went on to call Mother Teresa a dirtbag.Russell Brand was the host again and lobbed off easy jokes about Justin Bieber, Charlie Sheen (it's 2012, right?), Kanye West dating Kim Kardashian, and Michael Fassbender's member. Johnny Depp jumped the cool shark and jammed with the Black Keys. Mark Wahlberg sternly reprimanded a heckler who was mean to poor Mila Kunis, who went on to call Mother Teresa a dirtbag.
Something about Hunger Games. Also Taylor Lautner.Something about Hunger Games. Also Taylor Lautner.
It is the cynical desire to shock that so utterly fails to shock any more: Elizabeth Banks accepted an award for best transformation (because she was previously a hideous troll?) from some hunky dudes who play strippers in a forthcoming movie – including Channing Tatum who was once himself an actual male stripper. She grinded with them on stage. It was titillating.It is the cynical desire to shock that so utterly fails to shock any more: Elizabeth Banks accepted an award for best transformation (because she was previously a hideous troll?) from some hunky dudes who play strippers in a forthcoming movie – including Channing Tatum who was once himself an actual male stripper. She grinded with them on stage. It was titillating.
Kristen Stewart had no one to kiss when she won for best kiss so she made out with herself.Kristen Stewart had no one to kiss when she won for best kiss so she made out with herself.
Much has been said about the self-congratulatory nature of industry awards shows, from the Oscars to the Golden Globes to the People's Choice Awards to the Cannes Palme d'Or. There's the Sag Awards, the DGAs, the Alliance of Women Film Journalists awards. The Satellite Awards. With the current glut of these ceremonies, every next accolade seems hollower and shallower than the last.Much has been said about the self-congratulatory nature of industry awards shows, from the Oscars to the Golden Globes to the People's Choice Awards to the Cannes Palme d'Or. There's the Sag Awards, the DGAs, the Alliance of Women Film Journalists awards. The Satellite Awards. With the current glut of these ceremonies, every next accolade seems hollower and shallower than the last.
(It's not just movie stars or musicians, either. Journalists like giving themselves awards just as much as anyone. We're just not as telegenic.)(It's not just movie stars or musicians, either. Journalists like giving themselves awards just as much as anyone. We're just not as telegenic.)
But then there's MTV. Geared as it is to the short attention span, there is absolutely no need to watch the show. Every clip with the slightest viral potential – every manufactured watercooler moment – has been chopped and posted online, complete with a nice little ad leading into it.But then there's MTV. Geared as it is to the short attention span, there is absolutely no need to watch the show. Every clip with the slightest viral potential – every manufactured watercooler moment – has been chopped and posted online, complete with a nice little ad leading into it.
You can see Brand's painfully predictable monologue on any number of gossip or entertainment sites. (Oh, ho, he's making self-referential celebrity marriage jokes, that cheeky fellow.) You can see Wahlberg threaten to slap a heckler. You can see the band fun., every copy editor's worst nightmare, perform the opening number.You can see Brand's painfully predictable monologue on any number of gossip or entertainment sites. (Oh, ho, he's making self-referential celebrity marriage jokes, that cheeky fellow.) You can see Wahlberg threaten to slap a heckler. You can see the band fun., every copy editor's worst nightmare, perform the opening number.
And you don't need cable to see it. The numbers on Sunday night's viewership will not be out until later Monday afternoon, but the MTV movie awards were down year over year for the past two years. Viewership peaked at 7.1 million in 2002 and has gone as low as 3 million in 2008.And you don't need cable to see it. The numbers on Sunday night's viewership will not be out until later Monday afternoon, but the MTV movie awards were down year over year for the past two years. Viewership peaked at 7.1 million in 2002 and has gone as low as 3 million in 2008.
Last year 4.5 million viewers tuned in to see Justin Timberlake cop a feel off Kunis, who responded by grabbing his crotch. Gasp! Twilight hunk Robert Pattinson also made out with co-star Lautner. Zoinks!Last year 4.5 million viewers tuned in to see Justin Timberlake cop a feel off Kunis, who responded by grabbing his crotch. Gasp! Twilight hunk Robert Pattinson also made out with co-star Lautner. Zoinks!
There have been some genuinely entertaining – if not exactly shocking – moments in the show's past. In 1993 the grown-up cast of the Brady Bunch re-enacted the famous interview scene from Basic Instinct, with Florence Henderson in the Sharon Stone Role. There have been some genuinely entertaining – if not exactly shocking – moments in the show's past. In 1993 the grown-up cast of the Brady Bunch re-enacted the famous interview scene from Basic Instinct, with Florence Henderson in the Sharon Stone role.
In 1997 an unidentifiable Jim Carrey accepted an award in full hippie regalia, refusing to break character. "There sure is some fine-looking pussy in this room tonight, I'll tell you that much," he joked. Tom Cruise cut his honeymoon short in 2000 to fly 15 hours to play Tom Cruise's stunt double, Tom Cooze.In 1997 an unidentifiable Jim Carrey accepted an award in full hippie regalia, refusing to break character. "There sure is some fine-looking pussy in this room tonight, I'll tell you that much," he joked. Tom Cruise cut his honeymoon short in 2000 to fly 15 hours to play Tom Cruise's stunt double, Tom Cooze.
And in 2007 host Sarah Silverman completely annihilated Paris Hilton, who was due to serve time for driving under the influence. "In a couple of days, Paris Hilton is going to jail," Silverman said as Hilton stewed.And in 2007 host Sarah Silverman completely annihilated Paris Hilton, who was due to serve time for driving under the influence. "In a couple of days, Paris Hilton is going to jail," Silverman said as Hilton stewed.
"I heard that, to make her feel more comfortable in prison, the guards are going to paint the bars to look like penises. I just worry that she's going to break her teeth on those things.""I heard that, to make her feel more comfortable in prison, the guards are going to paint the bars to look like penises. I just worry that she's going to break her teeth on those things."
An easy target? Maybe, but the jokes were especially effective. So, an unsolicited word to the network: if MTV truly aspires to shock its viewers and sprinkle the web with genuinely viral fare, it could do worse in 2013 than getting some actual jokes out of Russell Brand.An easy target? Maybe, but the jokes were especially effective. So, an unsolicited word to the network: if MTV truly aspires to shock its viewers and sprinkle the web with genuinely viral fare, it could do worse in 2013 than getting some actual jokes out of Russell Brand.