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| Deputy Tony Blair rides into town to save wannabe sheriff John Prescott | Deputy Tony Blair rides into town to save wannabe sheriff John Prescott |
| (35 minutes later) | |
| In a highly unpredictable contest John Prescott may – or may not – emerge next Thursday as Humberside's first elected police and crime commissioner. But on the campaign trail on Friday he achieved a life-long ambition. At Mr Chu's Chinese restaurant in windswept Hull, Prezza finally appointed Tony Blair his deputy. | In a highly unpredictable contest John Prescott may – or may not – emerge next Thursday as Humberside's first elected police and crime commissioner. But on the campaign trail on Friday he achieved a life-long ambition. At Mr Chu's Chinese restaurant in windswept Hull, Prezza finally appointed Tony Blair his deputy. |
| It happened like this. As Labour's tallest poppy contesting the 41 police and crime commissioners elections across England and Wales next Thursday, Lord Prescott is the must-beat candidate for rival parties on Humberside and the East Riding of Yorkshire. David Cameron's Canadian-born police adviser, Lord Wasserman, singled him out as the kind of political has-been voters would regret seeing elected if turnout was low. | It happened like this. As Labour's tallest poppy contesting the 41 police and crime commissioners elections across England and Wales next Thursday, Lord Prescott is the must-beat candidate for rival parties on Humberside and the East Riding of Yorkshire. David Cameron's Canadian-born police adviser, Lord Wasserman, singled him out as the kind of political has-been voters would regret seeing elected if turnout was low. |
| Coming from the Tory camp it is an odd complaint, given that candidates of all parties and none have been complaining that the coalition has made it hard for non-political independents to get a fair hearing (primarily because there is no free campaign literature) and discouraged well-informed voters from stepping out by staging the elections on what is likely to be a dark and damp 15 November. | Coming from the Tory camp it is an odd complaint, given that candidates of all parties and none have been complaining that the coalition has made it hard for non-political independents to get a fair hearing (primarily because there is no free campaign literature) and discouraged well-informed voters from stepping out by staging the elections on what is likely to be a dark and damp 15 November. |
| Lord Prescott is an election addict. Even at 74 and safely installed in the Lords he hears the call of the Prescott battlebus, a low-budget version of which was parked outside Mr Chu's when his VIP supporter swept in from Abu Dubai via Doncaster's Robin Hood airport. | |
| MP for Hull East from 1970-2010, Prezza is fighting for his first non-safe seat since losing Southport as a fiery union militant in 1966. On life's journey he has mellowed, but not given up the fight he has waged relentlessly against the Tories and the English language. Watching him and Blair work a lunchtime party audience was like unexpectedly stumbling on a half-forgotten sitcom or a 90s Britpop revival: John and Tony together for yet another final New Labour gig, albeit without Peter on tambourine or Gordon on the drums. | MP for Hull East from 1970-2010, Prezza is fighting for his first non-safe seat since losing Southport as a fiery union militant in 1966. On life's journey he has mellowed, but not given up the fight he has waged relentlessly against the Tories and the English language. Watching him and Blair work a lunchtime party audience was like unexpectedly stumbling on a half-forgotten sitcom or a 90s Britpop revival: John and Tony together for yet another final New Labour gig, albeit without Peter on tambourine or Gordon on the drums. |
| One of Prezza's fundraising stunts during the bus's 1,000-mile tour round the Tory villages of east Yorkshire and Labour strongholds in Grimsby, Scunthorpe and Hull itself has been to sell "Prescott for Sheriff" badges. The word was he would pin one on Blair. | One of Prezza's fundraising stunts during the bus's 1,000-mile tour round the Tory villages of east Yorkshire and Labour strongholds in Grimsby, Scunthorpe and Hull itself has been to sell "Prescott for Sheriff" badges. The word was he would pin one on Blair. |
| It must have been a shock for the former prime minister, fresh from the winter warmth of the Middle East, to be greeted by a roaring Humberside wind. But as MP for Sedgefield he must have got used to it and took his punishment. There was worse to come. | It must have been a shock for the former prime minister, fresh from the winter warmth of the Middle East, to be greeted by a roaring Humberside wind. But as MP for Sedgefield he must have got used to it and took his punishment. There was worse to come. |
| Led by Graham "The Don" Petrini, Prescott's Yorkshire-Sicilian agent (his mobile ringtone is The Godfather theme) and his in-house consigliere, son David Prescott, Prezza's team had organised a student phone-bank in Mr Chu's basement dining room so that Blair could be filmed by regional TV ringing startled voters on the candidate's behalf. Guess what? No one believed it was him. | Led by Graham "The Don" Petrini, Prescott's Yorkshire-Sicilian agent (his mobile ringtone is The Godfather theme) and his in-house consigliere, son David Prescott, Prezza's team had organised a student phone-bank in Mr Chu's basement dining room so that Blair could be filmed by regional TV ringing startled voters on the candidate's behalf. Guess what? No one believed it was him. |
| "Hullo. Is that Alan Bergen? Hi, it's Tony Blair. (Pause.) Yes, it's TONY BLAIR. I am telephoning on behalf of John Prescott, the PCC election candidate, I'm doing a bit of canvassing. (Pause.) Well, that's fantastic, I know he'll do a great job. How are you doing? (Pause.) No, I am NOT taking the Michael. It's ME." | "Hullo. Is that Alan Bergen? Hi, it's Tony Blair. (Pause.) Yes, it's TONY BLAIR. I am telephoning on behalf of John Prescott, the PCC election candidate, I'm doing a bit of canvassing. (Pause.) Well, that's fantastic, I know he'll do a great job. How are you doing? (Pause.) No, I am NOT taking the Michael. It's ME." |
| By this time fellow phone-bank staff and the wider entourage were sniggering. But Blair did not win three elections by being a faint heart in the face of widespread refusals to believe him. He tried again. | By this time fellow phone-bank staff and the wider entourage were sniggering. But Blair did not win three elections by being a faint heart in the face of widespread refusals to believe him. He tried again. |
| "Hullo, it's Tony Blair here, TONY BLAIR. I'm calling on behalf of John Prescott. (Pause.) Yeah, I really am. Is Christine there? (Pause.) Yes, that is what I am doing, I am up here on Humberside giving him a hand. (Pause.) I know it's a bit of a shock, but there it is. I have decided to give him a hand and it's great to be back." | "Hullo, it's Tony Blair here, TONY BLAIR. I'm calling on behalf of John Prescott. (Pause.) Yeah, I really am. Is Christine there? (Pause.) Yes, that is what I am doing, I am up here on Humberside giving him a hand. (Pause.) I know it's a bit of a shock, but there it is. I have decided to give him a hand and it's great to be back." |
| Not even the Chilcot inquiry into the Iraq war or those NHS nurses who grilled him on TV were as sceptical as this. "He was definitely a little surprised," Blair conceded when his mini-session ended. Never mind. Photos followed, dozens of them, with the phone-bankers and the Prescott clan including three-year-old Ava, a chip off the Prescott block, with activists and the restaurant's waiters, then with the kitchen staff, not forgetting the Chu family – Jack, who built up what claims to be Britain's (certainly Hull's) biggest Chinese restaurant, and son Jimmy Chu, who makes tasty dim sum, not shoes. | |
| Of course, at such a deeply tribal event there were campaign speeches. The Prescott camp claims the Conservative candidate, Matthew Grove, is nice but lacklustre, too much an East Riding Tory to have urban appeal and that the Lib Dem's Simone Butterworth is lying low. Once second preferences are dished out Geoffrey Bloom, the distinctly colourful Ukip MEP, is the danger. The Guardian's taxi driver agrees. "I'm voting for Bloom. Everyone around here is fed up with Prescott." | Of course, at such a deeply tribal event there were campaign speeches. The Prescott camp claims the Conservative candidate, Matthew Grove, is nice but lacklustre, too much an East Riding Tory to have urban appeal and that the Lib Dem's Simone Butterworth is lying low. Once second preferences are dished out Geoffrey Bloom, the distinctly colourful Ukip MEP, is the danger. The Guardian's taxi driver agrees. "I'm voting for Bloom. Everyone around here is fed up with Prescott." |
| But not Tony Blair. Prezza battered the opposition with his usual vivid gusto, abusing Bloom in particular as a pro-hanging fox-hunter. He urged his activists to GET OUT THE VOTE ("I sound like bloody Obama, don't I?"). For Blair there was nothing but admiring affection: "just a great guy" whose achievements aren't recognised enough. He recalled that it was almost exactly 20 years since Blair and Brown (holed up in New York's swanky Carlyle Hotel) had coined their "tough on crime, tough on the causes of crime" slogan. They had cut crime by 40% too. | But not Tony Blair. Prezza battered the opposition with his usual vivid gusto, abusing Bloom in particular as a pro-hanging fox-hunter. He urged his activists to GET OUT THE VOTE ("I sound like bloody Obama, don't I?"). For Blair there was nothing but admiring affection: "just a great guy" whose achievements aren't recognised enough. He recalled that it was almost exactly 20 years since Blair and Brown (holed up in New York's swanky Carlyle Hotel) had coined their "tough on crime, tough on the causes of crime" slogan. They had cut crime by 40% too. |
| Then Prescott got out the sheriff's star and his five-point pledge card. "Tony, I've always wanted to make you my deputy," he said. Tanned, healthily thin, his hair convincingly greying at last, Blair looked a bit sheepish and sounded a bit out of practice. But the old trouper kicked in. He attacked Tory police cuts and praised Prezza to the skies: respect, admiration, even affection. No glitches. | Then Prescott got out the sheriff's star and his five-point pledge card. "Tony, I've always wanted to make you my deputy," he said. Tanned, healthily thin, his hair convincingly greying at last, Blair looked a bit sheepish and sounded a bit out of practice. But the old trouper kicked in. He attacked Tory police cuts and praised Prezza to the skies: respect, admiration, even affection. No glitches. |
| "I've always liked him, though it may not always have been mutual. I was one of his 'beautiful people' at one stage," he recalled. As Blair deftly handled TV crews Prescott whispered to an activist: "He's a bloody operator, isn't he? I'm living all this, but he's been out of it for a long time. Yet he can come back in." | "I've always liked him, though it may not always have been mutual. I was one of his 'beautiful people' at one stage," he recalled. As Blair deftly handled TV crews Prescott whispered to an activist: "He's a bloody operator, isn't he? I'm living all this, but he's been out of it for a long time. Yet he can come back in." |
| Why does Blair the globe-trotter ("I spend a lot of time in China now," he told Mrs Chu) come to Hull for Prezza, one metropolitan Blair intimate pondered at a smart London party this week? "Because he loves John." The love-in was all over in barely an hour. And as he headed south, wannabe Sheriff John's new deputy still wasn't wearing his star. | Why does Blair the globe-trotter ("I spend a lot of time in China now," he told Mrs Chu) come to Hull for Prezza, one metropolitan Blair intimate pondered at a smart London party this week? "Because he loves John." The love-in was all over in barely an hour. And as he headed south, wannabe Sheriff John's new deputy still wasn't wearing his star. |