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You can find the current article at its original source at http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2013/mar/15/max-epad-femme-tablet-hard-to-swallow
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Max ePad Femme – the tablet for women that's hard to swallow | Max ePad Femme – the tablet for women that's hard to swallow |
(7 months later) | |
You know that when even the Daily Mail calls a product sexist then you're onto a winner. Yep, just when you thought Bic for Her had finally done one on behalf of all ladyproducts, a new one comes along: the (Max) ePad Femme. | You know that when even the Daily Mail calls a product sexist then you're onto a winner. Yep, just when you thought Bic for Her had finally done one on behalf of all ladyproducts, a new one comes along: the (Max) ePad Femme. |
It may sound like a sanitary towel, but it's actually an electronic tablet for chicks, being as it is "less complicated" than the iPad, a device even babies and puppies seem able to use with ease (as I write, six-year-olds the country over are running up bills on their parents' iTunes, or, if you're my little brother, using Dad's eBay account to bid on Bob the Builder merchandise). | It may sound like a sanitary towel, but it's actually an electronic tablet for chicks, being as it is "less complicated" than the iPad, a device even babies and puppies seem able to use with ease (as I write, six-year-olds the country over are running up bills on their parents' iTunes, or, if you're my little brother, using Dad's eBay account to bid on Bob the Builder merchandise). |
Yet women are a different question entirely. The marketeers behind most ladyproducts seem to have gone for one of two strategies. Making the object pink taps into our genetic predisposition for all things fuschia (see the Honda Fit She's car), while making things the right size for our tiny ladyhands ensures that we'll no longer look like clumsy ditzy bimbos incapable of operating basic people-sized objects (see Cadbury's Crispello chocolate). | Yet women are a different question entirely. The marketeers behind most ladyproducts seem to have gone for one of two strategies. Making the object pink taps into our genetic predisposition for all things fuschia (see the Honda Fit She's car), while making things the right size for our tiny ladyhands ensures that we'll no longer look like clumsy ditzy bimbos incapable of operating basic people-sized objects (see Cadbury's Crispello chocolate). |
As such, the (Max) ePad Femme has a lovely pink background and nice big buttons for those with the learning difficulties so frequently associated with our gender. Already installed with all the relevant applications (yoga, pregnancy, shopping, tape measure), it saves you having to collude in your own patriarchal oppression at all – it's already there, ready and waiting. Ah, the convenience of technology. | As such, the (Max) ePad Femme has a lovely pink background and nice big buttons for those with the learning difficulties so frequently associated with our gender. Already installed with all the relevant applications (yoga, pregnancy, shopping, tape measure), it saves you having to collude in your own patriarchal oppression at all – it's already there, ready and waiting. Ah, the convenience of technology. |
Like many ladyproducts before it, the (Max) ePad Femme is already seeing something of an internet backlash. Having been developed by Middle East-based Eurostar group, one downside is that it doesn't seem to include a driving simulator. Nor does it seem to contain an application alerting me as to what the moon (aka Lord and Master of All Women) is up to. Disappointing. It does, however, include a "woman's assistant", which, rather than imparting useful advice regarding cures for cystitis or the legal definition of sexual assault, is choc-full of weight loss tips. Because we need more of those. | Like many ladyproducts before it, the (Max) ePad Femme is already seeing something of an internet backlash. Having been developed by Middle East-based Eurostar group, one downside is that it doesn't seem to include a driving simulator. Nor does it seem to contain an application alerting me as to what the moon (aka Lord and Master of All Women) is up to. Disappointing. It does, however, include a "woman's assistant", which, rather than imparting useful advice regarding cures for cystitis or the legal definition of sexual assault, is choc-full of weight loss tips. Because we need more of those. |
I'm not saying that the lads aren't facing their own gender-specific product problems, as the hair removal gel Veet for Men (sample Amazon review: "do not use on cock and balls") demonstrates. And let's not forget the Yorkie "it's not for girls" campaign. If chowing down on big, chunky phallic-shaped chocolate bar helps you cement your own rigidly defined sense of heteronormative masculinity then who are we to argue? The (Max) ePad Femme, meanwhile, is clearly not intended for a western market, but it has got me worried about which future technological abominations we could be facing. What next? Alarms that go off each time we ovulate? A make-me-a-sandwich toaster? Special deodorant to stop you sweating with anxiety next time your super-smart boyfriend goes back in time to be a contestant on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? Oh, wait, we've got that one already. | I'm not saying that the lads aren't facing their own gender-specific product problems, as the hair removal gel Veet for Men (sample Amazon review: "do not use on cock and balls") demonstrates. And let's not forget the Yorkie "it's not for girls" campaign. If chowing down on big, chunky phallic-shaped chocolate bar helps you cement your own rigidly defined sense of heteronormative masculinity then who are we to argue? The (Max) ePad Femme, meanwhile, is clearly not intended for a western market, but it has got me worried about which future technological abominations we could be facing. What next? Alarms that go off each time we ovulate? A make-me-a-sandwich toaster? Special deodorant to stop you sweating with anxiety next time your super-smart boyfriend goes back in time to be a contestant on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? Oh, wait, we've got that one already. |
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