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Theresa May basks in praise after Abu Qatada deportation Theresa May basks in praise after Abu Qatada deportation
(2 months later)
Not since Andy Murray won Wimbledon has anyone sat under such a hailstorm of congratulation as Theresa May on Monday. You'd imagine the deportation of Abu Qatada was the greatest triumph of statesmanship since the end of the second world war. The home secretary might have been relieved that Alex Salmond wasn't sitting behind her, grinning and waving a Scottish flag.Not since Andy Murray won Wimbledon has anyone sat under such a hailstorm of congratulation as Theresa May on Monday. You'd imagine the deportation of Abu Qatada was the greatest triumph of statesmanship since the end of the second world war. The home secretary might have been relieved that Alex Salmond wasn't sitting behind her, grinning and waving a Scottish flag.
In fact, the prime minister himself, who must be seriously worried about Mrs May's increasing, and seemingly unstoppable, popularity, sat in on some of her statement before deciding he had better things to do (like greeting Murray at No 10) than listen to the whole house telling her how utterly marvellous she was.In fact, the prime minister himself, who must be seriously worried about Mrs May's increasing, and seemingly unstoppable, popularity, sat in on some of her statement before deciding he had better things to do (like greeting Murray at No 10) than listen to the whole house telling her how utterly marvellous she was.
Of course, they wanted to smear themselves all over with Murray's factor 30 success. "I congratulate the home secretary," fluted Hazel Blears, "but I was thinking that it took 12 years to deport Abu Qatada, and only seven years for Andy Murray to win Wimbledon!" ("And five minutes for you to work that in," growled a grumpy Tory.)Of course, they wanted to smear themselves all over with Murray's factor 30 success. "I congratulate the home secretary," fluted Hazel Blears, "but I was thinking that it took 12 years to deport Abu Qatada, and only seven years for Andy Murray to win Wimbledon!" ("And five minutes for you to work that in," growled a grumpy Tory.)
Even Labour MPs were anxious to spray Mrs May with water cannon of praise. Perhaps they hope the love for Theresa will lead to a leadership contest. Perhaps they meant it, though of course with politicians that is always the least likely possibility.Even Labour MPs were anxious to spray Mrs May with water cannon of praise. Perhaps they hope the love for Theresa will lead to a leadership contest. Perhaps they meant it, though of course with politicians that is always the least likely possibility.
Keith Vaz, the Great Vaz of Vaz, and chairman of the home affairs committee, said the cleric's removal was "a personal triumph for her. She must have felt there were three people in that marriage!"Keith Vaz, the Great Vaz of Vaz, and chairman of the home affairs committee, said the cleric's removal was "a personal triumph for her. She must have felt there were three people in that marriage!"
Perhaps reflecting that the third party Princess Diana was referring to is now Duchess of Cornwall, Mrs May did grimace. After all, the differences between the two are multitudinous. Abu Qatada: long beard. Camilla: no beard. Abu Qatada: preaches that it is OK for true believers to kill infidels, especially Jews. Camilla: asks "have you come far?"Perhaps reflecting that the third party Princess Diana was referring to is now Duchess of Cornwall, Mrs May did grimace. After all, the differences between the two are multitudinous. Abu Qatada: long beard. Camilla: no beard. Abu Qatada: preaches that it is OK for true believers to kill infidels, especially Jews. Camilla: asks "have you come far?"
Buoyed by her success, Mrs May repeated that she wants to abolish the Human Rights Act, and maybe withdraw from the European court of human rights (ECHR).Buoyed by her success, Mrs May repeated that she wants to abolish the Human Rights Act, and maybe withdraw from the European court of human rights (ECHR).
Even some Tories thought that was going a bit far. Edward Garnier pointed out that even a British act would include a prohibition on torture, so it would have made no difference at all to the Qatada case! But Mrs May was in "first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers" (Shakespeare, Henry VI, pt 2) mode. The ECHR had "moved the goalposts". The judges didn't "get it".Even some Tories thought that was going a bit far. Edward Garnier pointed out that even a British act would include a prohibition on torture, so it would have made no difference at all to the Qatada case! But Mrs May was in "first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers" (Shakespeare, Henry VI, pt 2) mode. The ECHR had "moved the goalposts". The judges didn't "get it".
In the end, Mrs May felt obliged to join in the congratulations for herself, praising her own "grim determination".In the end, Mrs May felt obliged to join in the congratulations for herself, praising her own "grim determination".
Moments later, Michael Gove, the education secretary, was talking about the new schools curriculum, which will include Boolean logic. In my day we hoped for rain so sport would be cancelled. Now pupils will say: "I've got a sore throat, so I can't do double Boolean logic today!"Moments later, Michael Gove, the education secretary, was talking about the new schools curriculum, which will include Boolean logic. In my day we hoped for rain so sport would be cancelled. Now pupils will say: "I've got a sore throat, so I can't do double Boolean logic today!"
Of course many teachers feel they need a crash course in Govean logic.Of course many teachers feel they need a crash course in Govean logic.
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