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| Version 0 | Version 1 |
|---|---|
| Prime minister's questions: the sound and the fury | Prime minister's questions: the sound and the fury |
| (2 months later) | |
| The Commons discussed party funding on Thursday. Here is my account: Mr Speaker: "The prime minister!" | The Commons discussed party funding on Thursday. Here is my account: Mr Speaker: "The prime minister!" |
| Hon members: "Gurrgh hagg scree cranggg brung!" | Hon members: "Gurrgh hagg scree cranggg brung!" |
| Mr Speaker: "Order. This is exceptionally discourteous." | Mr Speaker: "Order. This is exceptionally discourteous." |
| Hon members: "Strungth skeep arsepiopper baba-au-rhum. Resign!" | Hon members: "Strungth skeep arsepiopper baba-au-rhum. Resign!" |
| Mr Miliband: "… how much his party has received from hedge funds?" | Mr Miliband: "… how much his party has received from hedge funds?" |
| The prime minister: "I am not surprised ..." | The prime minister: "I am not surprised ..." |
| Hon members: "Chomp prannet whoops screech bhajee!" | Hon members: "Chomp prannet whoops screech bhajee!" |
| Mr Speaker: "The prime minister will answer and we will hear him do so!" | Mr Speaker: "The prime minister will answer and we will hear him do so!" |
| The prime minister: "... addresses the 40 seats that Unite has so far fiddled!" | The prime minister: "... addresses the 40 seats that Unite has so far fiddled!" |
| Hon members: "Tramsolder! Farnsbarns! Splurge! Tarka dal!" | Hon members: "Tramsolder! Farnsbarns! Splurge! Tarka dal!" |
| Mr Speaker: "Please, let us have a bit of order and some answers!" | Mr Speaker: "Please, let us have a bit of order and some answers!" |
| Mr Miliband: "I do not think the prime minister wanted to answer the question. The answer is £25 million …" | Mr Miliband: "I do not think the prime minister wanted to answer the question. The answer is £25 million …" |
| Hon members: "Scrummble brummble kneecap strumpet voluntary." | Hon members: "Scrummble brummble kneecap strumpet voluntary." |
| The prime minister: "… Unite paid their money, they bought their votes, they put him in his place!" | The prime minister: "… Unite paid their money, they bought their votes, they put him in his place!" |
| Hon members: (by now in danger of a coronary incident) "Skat. Sheeshkebab. Strangford Loch. Vindaloo!" | Hon members: (by now in danger of a coronary incident) "Skat. Sheeshkebab. Strangford Loch. Vindaloo!" |
| Mr Miliband: "… a party funded by a few millionaires at the top!" | Mr Miliband: "… a party funded by a few millionaires at the top!" |
| Mr Michael Ellis: (Con, Northampton N) "Stang furbelow brisket whatsapp!" | Mr Michael Ellis: (Con, Northampton N) "Stang furbelow brisket whatsapp!" |
| Mr Speaker: Mr Ellis, you find it so difficult to control yourself. Calm it, man! Get a grip of the situation!" | Mr Speaker: Mr Ellis, you find it so difficult to control yourself. Calm it, man! Get a grip of the situation!" |
| Mr Miliband "... fundamental reform in the way our parties are funded." | Mr Miliband "... fundamental reform in the way our parties are funded." |
| The prime minister: "Let me deal ..." | The prime minister: "Let me deal ..." |
| Hon members: "Burrrp kookaburra krupp mini-dosa speculum." | Hon members: "Burrrp kookaburra krupp mini-dosa speculum." |
| Mr Speaker: "Order. We have got to listen to hear." | Mr Speaker: "Order. We have got to listen to hear." |
| The prime minister "... Let me say this. There is a ..." | The prime minister "... Let me say this. There is a ..." |
| Hon members: "Ribbit ribbit. Ontology wossick whapsocket. Resign." | Hon members: "Ribbit ribbit. Ontology wossick whapsocket. Resign." |
| Mr Speaker: "There is far too much shouting!" | Mr Speaker: "There is far too much shouting!" |
| The prime minister: "The result of a trade union scandal should not be every taxpayer paying for Labour." | The prime minister: "The result of a trade union scandal should not be every taxpayer paying for Labour." |
| Mr Miliband: "So there we have it ..." | Mr Miliband: "So there we have it ..." |
| Hon members "Frink hazchem Mumsnet echidna." | Hon members "Frink hazchem Mumsnet echidna." |
| Mr Speaker: "Order!" | Mr Speaker: "Order!" |
| Mr Miliband: "So the prime minister is ducking electoral reform!" | Mr Miliband: "So the prime minister is ducking electoral reform!" |
| The prime minister: "The right honourable gentleman should make me an offer ..." | The prime minister: "The right honourable gentleman should make me an offer ..." |
| Hon members: "Piperade quantum dholakia scram spongist!" | Hon members: "Piperade quantum dholakia scram spongist!" |
| Mr Speaker: "The question must be heard!" | Mr Speaker: "The question must be heard!" |
| Mr Miliband: "I am proud we have links with ordinary people. He is bankrolled by a few millionaires. The party of people. The party of privilege." | Mr Miliband: "I am proud we have links with ordinary people. He is bankrolled by a few millionaires. The party of people. The party of privilege." |
| Mr Speaker: "We cannot just have a wall of noise." | Mr Speaker: "We cannot just have a wall of noise." |
| But that's what he got. There was a great deal more said in the session, but sadly I could not hear it against the wall of noise. | But that's what he got. There was a great deal more said in the session, but sadly I could not hear it against the wall of noise. |
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