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Pregnant at 13, mum at 14, GCSEs at 15 Pregnant at 13, mum at 14, GCSEs at 15
(10 minutes later)
By Tom Geoghegan BBC News Magazine As calls are made for sex education to be compulsory in all schools Kizzy Neal, 15, is one teenager with a lot on her plate - exams, boyfriends and looking after her seven-month-old son.By Tom Geoghegan BBC News Magazine As calls are made for sex education to be compulsory in all schools Kizzy Neal, 15, is one teenager with a lot on her plate - exams, boyfriends and looking after her seven-month-old son.
Kizzy was in her best friend's bedroom when she found out she was pregnant, in the summer of 2006. She was 13.Kizzy was in her best friend's bedroom when she found out she was pregnant, in the summer of 2006. She was 13.
"I didn't stop crying for three weeks and I was really, really scared," she says, now aged 15. "I knew I'd done something wrong. Thirteen is not the ideal age to have a baby.""I didn't stop crying for three weeks and I was really, really scared," she says, now aged 15. "I knew I'd done something wrong. Thirteen is not the ideal age to have a baby."
She had been fearful after having sex for the first time, unprotected, with Louie.She had been fearful after having sex for the first time, unprotected, with Louie.
"Since I got pregnant, I've learnt so much about contraception, abortions and sex but at school I think I had so few sex education lessons.""Since I got pregnant, I've learnt so much about contraception, abortions and sex but at school I think I had so few sex education lessons."
While the father of her child rejected being a dad and moved away, Kizzy never considered having her pregnancy terminated.While the father of her child rejected being a dad and moved away, Kizzy never considered having her pregnancy terminated.
Kizzy: Mum at 14 As it went on, she became the target of abuse from people in her hometown of Torbay, Devon. She was spat at and her brothers were attacked because, her father Kevin believes, she chose not to abort it.Kizzy: Mum at 14 As it went on, she became the target of abuse from people in her hometown of Torbay, Devon. She was spat at and her brothers were attacked because, her father Kevin believes, she chose not to abort it.
She has lost friends because of it but the same girls that had abused her changed their behaviour after she had baby Kaylib in May.She has lost friends because of it but the same girls that had abused her changed their behaviour after she had baby Kaylib in May.
"When I was pregnant it was like 'You little so-and-so' but when I had the baby they were round the pram saying 'isn't he beautiful?'"When I was pregnant it was like 'You little so-and-so' but when I had the baby they were round the pram saying 'isn't he beautiful?'
"It was a bit two-faced. Without a baby, I didn't want to go out of the house and I was scared but as soon as I had the baby the people I was scared of were coming up being really nice to me.""It was a bit two-faced. Without a baby, I didn't want to go out of the house and I was scared but as soon as I had the baby the people I was scared of were coming up being really nice to me."
The birth itself, in May, was the best moment of her life, she says.The birth itself, in May, was the best moment of her life, she says.
"When they put him on my chest, I was so overwhelmed, you don't know whether to smile or cry or laugh or scream, you don't know what to do. It gives you a warm feeling in your tummy.""When they put him on my chest, I was so overwhelmed, you don't know whether to smile or cry or laugh or scream, you don't know what to do. It gives you a warm feeling in your tummy."
SacrificesSacrifices
From that moment on, says Kizzy's mother, Kerry, the atmosphere changed. "There was so much negativity about Kizzy having the baby in the first place then when he was born there was so much joy and excitement and everyone loves him."From that moment on, says Kizzy's mother, Kerry, the atmosphere changed. "There was so much negativity about Kizzy having the baby in the first place then when he was born there was so much joy and excitement and everyone loves him."
Kizzy returned to college in September, leaving her mother to look after Kaylib while she studies for six GCSEs. She wants to be a member of Parliament but if that doesn't happen, to be an occupational therapist.Kizzy returned to college in September, leaving her mother to look after Kaylib while she studies for six GCSEs. She wants to be a member of Parliament but if that doesn't happen, to be an occupational therapist.
But although Kizzy may look like any other student in the classroom, she is constantly reminded of her responsibilities as a parent because of the sacrifices she has to make and what she describes as her lost childhood.But although Kizzy may look like any other student in the classroom, she is constantly reminded of her responsibilities as a parent because of the sacrifices she has to make and what she describes as her lost childhood.
"I miss being able to get up and go out when I want to and doing teenage things. I can't do these things as much anymore but I do get help from mum and dad so I get the chance to be a child as well as a mum.""I miss being able to get up and go out when I want to and doing teenage things. I can't do these things as much anymore but I do get help from mum and dad so I get the chance to be a child as well as a mum."
It's hard to let go of your childhood Kizzy NealIt's hard to let go of your childhood Kizzy Neal
She has made a programme with BBC Three about her experience to show other teenage girls that motherhood is "not all about cute babies, it's hard work".She has made a programme with BBC Three about her experience to show other teenage girls that motherhood is "not all about cute babies, it's hard work".
"It's hard to let go of your childhood, you have to break away from that, you have grow up really fast, you have to mature quickly. It's hard getting to grips with being a mum and how to look after your child the best you can.""It's hard to let go of your childhood, you have to break away from that, you have grow up really fast, you have to mature quickly. It's hard getting to grips with being a mum and how to look after your child the best you can."
It's even harder without a father, and earlier this year Kizzy took Kaylib to Southend to meet her dad. On her way home, it struck Kizzy that the two probably won't meet again.It's even harder without a father, and earlier this year Kizzy took Kaylib to Southend to meet her dad. On her way home, it struck Kizzy that the two probably won't meet again.
"I was thinking about the baby growing up without a dad and thought I'd let him down. It's ideal to have a mum and a dad and to have a proper environment but it's very different for me. He's got as much love as he needs, even without a dad.""I was thinking about the baby growing up without a dad and thought I'd let him down. It's ideal to have a mum and a dad and to have a proper environment but it's very different for me. He's got as much love as he needs, even without a dad."
Giving out condomsGiving out condoms
Kizzy's story is not uncommon in the UK, which has the highest teenage pregnancy rate in western Europe.Kizzy's story is not uncommon in the UK, which has the highest teenage pregnancy rate in western Europe.
There are 80,000 girls under 19 getting pregnant each year, according to Brook sexual health charity, and on average four out of 10 have the baby. But the rate is falling and sexual education is working, says chief executive Simon Blake.There are 80,000 girls under 19 getting pregnant each year, according to Brook sexual health charity, and on average four out of 10 have the baby. But the rate is falling and sexual education is working, says chief executive Simon Blake.
Kizzy's parents help look after Kaylib"It is reducing. We've got a teenage pregnancy strategy that is working. Good quality sexual education and access to services is a real part of the solution. Kizzy's parents help look after Kaylib"It is reducing. We've got a teenage pregnancy strategy that is working. Good quality sexual education and access to services is a real part of the solution."
Last week, campaigners called for sex and relationships education to be made compulsory in all schools. The Terrence Higgins Trust, the NSPCC and the National Union of Teachers said no schools should be able to "opt out of delivering good sex and relationships education to their pupils".Last week, campaigners called for sex and relationships education to be made compulsory in all schools. The Terrence Higgins Trust, the NSPCC and the National Union of Teachers said no schools should be able to "opt out of delivering good sex and relationships education to their pupils".
Kizzy believes her school takes the wrong approach by too readily giving out condoms and "promoting sex".Kizzy believes her school takes the wrong approach by too readily giving out condoms and "promoting sex".
AbstinenceAbstinence
It is claimed 11 other girls at the school also became pregnant, which the school strongly denies.It is claimed 11 other girls at the school also became pregnant, which the school strongly denies.
The school says it devotes considerable resources to sex education and says part of its message is to teach youngsters to delay having sex until in a stable, loving relationship. It also has a confidential drop-in centre called Tic-Tac that offers advice on sexual health, abortion and contraception.The school says it devotes considerable resources to sex education and says part of its message is to teach youngsters to delay having sex until in a stable, loving relationship. It also has a confidential drop-in centre called Tic-Tac that offers advice on sexual health, abortion and contraception.
Tic-Tac has been held up by the government as a model of good practice but Kizzy's father Kevin believes its work undermines a parent's efforts to instil abstinence in a child. His daughter accepts it was her mistake but her fears that having Kaylib meant the "end of fun" have not been realised.Tic-Tac has been held up by the government as a model of good practice but Kizzy's father Kevin believes its work undermines a parent's efforts to instil abstinence in a child. His daughter accepts it was her mistake but her fears that having Kaylib meant the "end of fun" have not been realised.
"Every day that goes by," she says, "there's something he does that makes me laugh.""Every day that goes by," she says, "there's something he does that makes me laugh."
Kizzy: Mum at 14 will be broadcast on BBC Three on Tuesday, 11 December at 2230 GMT.Kizzy: Mum at 14 will be broadcast on BBC Three on Tuesday, 11 December at 2230 GMT.

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