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Why the continental blowtorch is hot news Why the continental blowtorch is hot news
(about 2 hours later)
Name: Continental blowtorch.Name: Continental blowtorch.
Age: A day or so.Age: A day or so.
Appearance: Squirty.Appearance: Squirty.
Is this that fancy cooking device that people use to make creme brulee? It is not.Is this that fancy cooking device that people use to make creme brulee? It is not.
Might a continental blowtorch be more concerned with the problem of existence while stripping paint, and less with axiomatic reasoning, like an analytic blowtorch? Unlikely. Might a continental blowtorch be more concerned with the problem of existence while stripping paint, and less with axiomatic reasoning, like an analytic blowtorch? Unlikely.
OK, OK. Whereas a full English blowtorch “cooks” away the weeds on your patio, a continental blowtorch just covers them with baguette slices and jam? Now you’re just being silly. OK, OK. Whereas a full English blowtorch “cooks” away the weeds on your patio, a continental blowtorch just covers them with baguette slices and jam? Now you’re just being silly.
I’ve been silly for some time. A continental blowtorch is, in fact, a plume of hot weather that stretches up from southern Europe towards Britain. I’ve been silly for some time. A continental blowtorch is, in fact, a plume of hot weather that stretches up from southern Europe towards Britain.
In that case, I like continental blowtorches. Excellent. Well,r you’ll be pleased to know the UK has got one now. In that case, I like continental blowtorches. Excellent. Well, you’ll be pleased to know the UK has got one now.
I am! Why do they happen? Because of a series of weather things that take place – heat, temperature and so on. It’s all about the isobars. I am! Why do they happen? Because of a series of weather things that take place – heat, temperature and so on. It’s all about the isobars.
You don’t really know, do you? No. But the good news is it’s bringing extremely warm weather for the time of year to most of southern Britain during the next couple of days. On Thursday, it might even make 27C in places. Then there will be a few thunderstorms on Friday. You don’t really know, do you? No. But the good news is it’s bringing extremely warm weather for the time of year to most of southern Britain during the next couple of days. On Thursday, it might even make 27C in places. Then there will be a few thunderstorms on Friday.
So tell me, where did this cumbersome but likable expression come from? It seems to have been coined this summer by Brian Gaze.So tell me, where did this cumbersome but likable expression come from? It seems to have been coined this summer by Brian Gaze.
Who’s Brian Gaze? He’s some guy with a website called The Weather Outlook. Anyway, all the newspapers have picked up on the term.Who’s Brian Gaze? He’s some guy with a website called The Weather Outlook. Anyway, all the newspapers have picked up on the term.
Including us now? I’m afraid so.Including us now? I’m afraid so.
Am I imagining it, or are the British getting more technical in their weather conversations? What do you mean?Am I imagining it, or are the British getting more technical in their weather conversations? What do you mean?
It used to be: “Ooh, it’s a bit parky.” But now we’re all, “the jet stream went over there” and “the ex-tropical storm did that”. Though there has been a significant recent increase in people talking utter bilge, it is too early to say whether it amounts to a long-term trend.It used to be: “Ooh, it’s a bit parky.” But now we’re all, “the jet stream went over there” and “the ex-tropical storm did that”. Though there has been a significant recent increase in people talking utter bilge, it is too early to say whether it amounts to a long-term trend.
So is this warm weather because of climate change? For the last time, maybe!So is this warm weather because of climate change? For the last time, maybe!
Do say: “Why is everybody quoting some guy with a website?”Do say: “Why is everybody quoting some guy with a website?”
Don’t say: “Because he says things such as ‘continental blowtorch’.”Don’t say: “Because he says things such as ‘continental blowtorch’.”