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| Donald Macintyre's Lib Dem Conference Sketch: Like a band breaking up and arguing about who wrote the songs | |
| (1 day later) | |
| If the Rose Garden in 2010 was the joyous wedding, this is certainly the Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? stage of a noisy marriage breakdown, with the couple for some reason determined to stay together despite irreconcilable differences. | If the Rose Garden in 2010 was the joyous wedding, this is certainly the Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? stage of a noisy marriage breakdown, with the couple for some reason determined to stay together despite irreconcilable differences. |
| Actually, watching the Lib Dems castigating their Tory Coalition partners is more reminiscent of a major band unravelling – Oasis, say – with the added twist that the players are arguing in public about who wrote the songs. | Actually, watching the Lib Dems castigating their Tory Coalition partners is more reminiscent of a major band unravelling – Oasis, say – with the added twist that the players are arguing in public about who wrote the songs. |
| On Sunday, it was Danny Alexander’s turn to play Noel Gallagher to George Osborne’s Liam. Recalling what he had told The Sun, namely that it “really pisses me off ... when people say [it] is the Conservatives who have sorted out the economy,” he continued: “I wrote the recovery plan. Cutting taxes for working people. Not a Conservative idea – a Liberal Democrat idea. A dramatic increase in apprenticeships. Not a Conservative idea...” Well, you get the picture – though there was a lot more of this. Not to mention denouncing the “heartless, soulless” Tories – to some effect – for laying the deficit-cutting burden on the working poor. | On Sunday, it was Danny Alexander’s turn to play Noel Gallagher to George Osborne’s Liam. Recalling what he had told The Sun, namely that it “really pisses me off ... when people say [it] is the Conservatives who have sorted out the economy,” he continued: “I wrote the recovery plan. Cutting taxes for working people. Not a Conservative idea – a Liberal Democrat idea. A dramatic increase in apprenticeships. Not a Conservative idea...” Well, you get the picture – though there was a lot more of this. Not to mention denouncing the “heartless, soulless” Tories – to some effect – for laying the deficit-cutting burden on the working poor. |
| “So roll your sleeves up and go tell our story,” the Chief Secretary to the Treasury urged the conference. Luckily, he had – unusually – come without jacket and tie, and had his sleeves rolled up. Alexander is the kind of general who would never ask his troops to do something he wouldn’t do himself. | “So roll your sleeves up and go tell our story,” the Chief Secretary to the Treasury urged the conference. Luckily, he had – unusually – come without jacket and tie, and had his sleeves rolled up. Alexander is the kind of general who would never ask his troops to do something he wouldn’t do himself. |
| He had a good go at Labour, too, of course. He said, the 2008 crash was the “product of the old two-party system”. Which was news to those know-nothings who thought it had something to do with the banks horribly overextending themselves. | He had a good go at Labour, too, of course. He said, the 2008 crash was the “product of the old two-party system”. Which was news to those know-nothings who thought it had something to do with the banks horribly overextending themselves. |
| Not so, explained Alexander, “Like two drunks fighting over the steering wheel of the car, the lurches between one single-party administration and another got bigger and bigger until they crashed it completely.” Hmm. A car crash metaphor which was a bit of a car crash itself. | Not so, explained Alexander, “Like two drunks fighting over the steering wheel of the car, the lurches between one single-party administration and another got bigger and bigger until they crashed it completely.” Hmm. A car crash metaphor which was a bit of a car crash itself. |
| There was one scary “Big Brother” bit when he warned that HMRC had now hired “psychologists and behavioural economists” to chase unpaid tax: “Tax dodgers beware... We know where you live and now we know what you think.” But then, revealing his softer side, he confessed to having shed “more than a few tears” when the Scottish referendum results came in. | There was one scary “Big Brother” bit when he warned that HMRC had now hired “psychologists and behavioural economists” to chase unpaid tax: “Tax dodgers beware... We know where you live and now we know what you think.” But then, revealing his softer side, he confessed to having shed “more than a few tears” when the Scottish referendum results came in. |
| Surprising, since you wouldn’t have thought he was a man for tears. But then his relief may have been compounded by realising that as a Scottish MP he still had the chance to lead his party. | Surprising, since you wouldn’t have thought he was a man for tears. But then his relief may have been compounded by realising that as a Scottish MP he still had the chance to lead his party. |