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| Gay couple's decision to donate sperm to their lesbian friends ended in 'mutual loathing' | |
| (about 11 hours later) | |
| A gay couple’s decision to donate sperm so their two lesbian friends could have children was a “wonderful” and thoroughly progressive endeavour. | A gay couple’s decision to donate sperm so their two lesbian friends could have children was a “wonderful” and thoroughly progressive endeavour. |
| But it has ended in “mutual loathing”, bitter litigation and a custody battle that encapsulates some of the potential pitfalls of modern life, a High Court judge said today. | But it has ended in “mutual loathing”, bitter litigation and a custody battle that encapsulates some of the potential pitfalls of modern life, a High Court judge said today. |
| The Family Division of the High Court heard how a falling out between the two couples led to a legal battle lasting nearly six years. Mr Justice Cobb said this has resulted in harm to the two girls born as a result of the donations – one in her early teens and the other nearing her 10th birthday. | The Family Division of the High Court heard how a falling out between the two couples led to a legal battle lasting nearly six years. Mr Justice Cobb said this has resulted in harm to the two girls born as a result of the donations – one in her early teens and the other nearing her 10th birthday. |
| In written rulings, he said the two couples – who can be identified only as Father 1 and Father 2, and Mother 1 and Mother 2 – had begun as friends. Two girls – known to the court only as A and B – were born, both the “biological children” of Father 1 and Mother 1. | In written rulings, he said the two couples – who can be identified only as Father 1 and Father 2, and Mother 1 and Mother 2 – had begun as friends. Two girls – known to the court only as A and B – were born, both the “biological children” of Father 1 and Mother 1. |
| Then, in a case that the judge said showed the potential problems of “known-donor fertilisation”, the legal wrangling began. The “fathers” applied to have contact with the children, but found the mothers opposed to the move. | Then, in a case that the judge said showed the potential problems of “known-donor fertilisation”, the legal wrangling began. The “fathers” applied to have contact with the children, but found the mothers opposed to the move. |
| “Friends and collaborators in this wonderful endeavour of creating a family, have become to some extent strangers, harbouring strong feelings of mutual distrust and reciprocal aversion,” said Mr Justice Cobb. | “Friends and collaborators in this wonderful endeavour of creating a family, have become to some extent strangers, harbouring strong feelings of mutual distrust and reciprocal aversion,” said Mr Justice Cobb. |
| A “sense of mutual loathing”, he added, appeared to have “infused hearings”. | A “sense of mutual loathing”, he added, appeared to have “infused hearings”. |
| Making a series of orders and saying he wanted litigation to end, Mr Justice Cobb observed: “I fear that the childhoods of A and B have been irredeemably marred by the on-going court conflict.” | Making a series of orders and saying he wanted litigation to end, Mr Justice Cobb observed: “I fear that the childhoods of A and B have been irredeemably marred by the on-going court conflict.” |
| He added: “The case illustrates all too clearly the immense difficulties which can be unleashed when families are created by known-donor fertilisation. The litigation has had a destructive effect on the parties.” | He added: “The case illustrates all too clearly the immense difficulties which can be unleashed when families are created by known-donor fertilisation. The litigation has had a destructive effect on the parties.” |
| Mr Justice Cobb indicated that the girls would live with their mothers under the supervision of social workers. | Mr Justice Cobb indicated that the girls would live with their mothers under the supervision of social workers. |
| He said the “fathers” could write to the older child – who was opposed to “contact”. He said they could see the younger child on specified occasions. | He said the “fathers” could write to the older child – who was opposed to “contact”. He said they could see the younger child on specified occasions. |
| The case is not the first where problems have resulted from gay men donating sperm to help lesbians have a baby. In 2012 A gay man who donated sperm to his lesbian ex-wife from a marriage of convenience went to the Appeal Court to demand overnight and holiday contact with her two-year-old son. | The case is not the first where problems have resulted from gay men donating sperm to help lesbians have a baby. In 2012 A gay man who donated sperm to his lesbian ex-wife from a marriage of convenience went to the Appeal Court to demand overnight and holiday contact with her two-year-old son. |
| She and her partner insisted he had “betrayed” a “pact” made in a restaurant before the child was conceived under which the father would have only “limited” parental rights. | She and her partner insisted he had “betrayed” a “pact” made in a restaurant before the child was conceived under which the father would have only “limited” parental rights. |