Premier League clockwatch – as it happened
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http://www.theguardian.com/football/live/2014/nov/09/premier-league-clockwatch-live Version 0 of 1. 3.30pm GMT15:30 Right then, that’s about us - but if you want more, pop next door to join me for Swansea-Arsenal. Updated at 3.31pm GMT 3.29pm GMT15:29 Newcastle are now 7th with their fourth win in a row, Stoke go 9th, and Everton 10th. Liverpool are in the bottom half. 3.27pm GMT15:27 FULL-TIME: Spurs 1-2 Stoke That four defeats in six home games for Spurs. But even so, what a result for Stoke. 3.26pm GMT15:26 FULL-TIME: Sunderland 1-1 Everton That was a lot of fun, and the result probably reflects the balance of chances. Burnley aside, it’s really not easy to know who’s going down this season. Updated at 3.26pm GMT 3.25pm GMT15:25 90+4 min Brown heads it away, and that’s that. 3.25pm GMT15:25 90+4 min Coleman paces down the right, away from Bridcutt, and his cross is deflected behind for a corner. 3.24pm GMT15:24 90+3 min So nearly the winner for Sunderland, Wes Brown rising to headbutt a cross down and towards the right-hand post, only for McCarthy to somehow scramble off the line. 3.24pm GMT15:24 Funny one, this Pardew thing - had he been sacked, it would not have been at all easy to construct a winning argument against the move; it would’ve been the right decision. And yet, quite clearly, it wouldn’t have been. 3.22pm GMT15:22 FULL-TIME: West Brom 0-2 Newcastle Another disciplined and speedy effort from Newcastle. Pardew Out! 3.22pm GMT15:22 88 min Consternation at Sunderland! Fielding a slowing ball allowed back to him by Jagielka and with Fletcher in pursuit, Tim Howard lies on it with his chest, watches Fletcher by, then gets up and clears. Brilliant keeping, as is now agreed by the players, but the crowd still think he played it with his hand. He didn’t. 3.19pm GMT15:19 87 min It’s end-to-end at Sunderland - this has been a really excellent game. 3.17pm GMT15:17 90 min There shall be three added minutes at the Hawthorns. 3.17pm GMT15:17 RED CARD! Kyle Naughton of Spurs! Moses espies all manner of space behind Naughton, so applies the ball to it and dashes in pursuit, along the touchline. Credit where it’s due, Naughton takes not a single fibre of a chance, slamming into him to earn a dismissal. Moses wasn’t quite through - Kaboul was near, and he was out wide - but it’s hard to argue with the decision in any event. Updated at 3.28pm GMT 3.14pm GMT15:14 85 min And there it nearly is. The reborn Sissoko moses over to the right, feeding Taylor to snap over a cross. Perez is first to rise, and he hangs before powering a header that forces foster to tip over. 3.12pm GMT15:12 83 min Things are phutting to a halt at the Hawrthorns. It’s about time for another Newcastle goal on the break. 3.11pm GMT15:11 78 min Back at Sunderland, the dastardly Jordi Gomez is replaced by Jack Rodwell - who once played for Everton, apparently. 3.08pm GMT15:08 GOAL! Spurs 1-2 Stoke (Chadli, 77) Miserable though Spurs have been under Pochettino, he has found a use for Nacer Chadli - not something that looked especially likely last season. And here, Rose nashed down the left before hooking over a cross to the back post, where Chadli arrived to bump home a deceptively tricky finish. Updated at 3.28pm GMT 3.08pm GMT15:08 77 min According to the laws, Wickham is a little fortunate to stay on the pitch. I say according to the laws, because defenders should be allowed to make an honest attempt at playing the ball without being punished twice, with a penalty and a red card. 3.07pm GMT15:07 GOAL! Sunderland 1-1 Everton (Baines pen, 76) Baines, who missed his last kick at Old Trafford, drives low and just right of centre - but Pantilimon can only dive over it. Updated at 3.29pm GMT 3.04pm GMT15:04 PENALTY TO EVERTON AT SUNDERLAND! Wickham on Coleman! This is all about the great Samuel Eto’o, who, in his new role behind Lukaku, picks a pass that takes out five defenders and finds Coleman inside the box. As he prepares to shoot, a desperate tackle sends him crashing down, and though there’s beaucoup de rancour, it’s a clear foul. Updated at 3.06pm GMT 3.03pm GMT15:03 72 min “Spurs fans shouldn’t get too down about what’s happening to their club,” advises Simon McMahon. “Look at it this way - they’re the side that make every other side feel better about themselves. That’s quite an achievement, and one not to be belittled. We should all be grateful. Good old Spurs.” Tottenham Philanthrotspur. Updated at 3.03pm GMT 3.02pm GMT15:02 70 min “As a bemused and embarrassed Spurs fan, I can’t help thinking the league in general would be better served if a salary cap was put in place, and clubs then topped it up to levels which match other major leagues in performance incentives” suggests Toby Thatcher. “We then might see slightly fewer overpaid morons ambling around, content in the knowledge that their millions are guaranteed, and at worst they will be sold to another club who will pay them to put no effort in.” I agree with this, but for different reasons. I’d go salary cap and transfer cap - incoming and outgoing - to keep the league competitive, more about football and less about exchequer. 3.00pm GMT15:00 67 min I’ve some friends - yes, I know, get me - who watch Sunderland, and who stopped going to Everton after all that befell them there. For example, a 7-1 thrashing followed by a parking ticket. 2.57pm GMT14:57 GOAL! Sunderland 1-0 Everton Larsson steps up and slams a flip semi-over, semi-through a disintegrating wall, in at the near post. Tim Howard is anger and fury. Updated at 3.31pm GMT 2.57pm GMT14:57 65 min Baines pulls down the recently-arrived Buckley, just outside the D, slightly to the left. It’s Beckham, and Larsson territory... 2.55pm GMT14:55 65 min Can someone please confirm that Etienne Capoue’s dressing room nickname is Truman? Thanks. He’s been replaced by Emmanuel Adebayor. Updated at 2.55pm GMT 2.54pm GMT14:54 65 min “Anything other than Spurs navel-gazing to offer?” asks Alec McAulay. “How is Bojan doing? Isn’t it remarkable how Jon Walters is dynamic, pacy, a new man this season? Is Begovic busy at all? He’s falling down the goalie stats league because he has so few shots to save this season. Apparently all serious fantasy football players know that you have to put Shawcross in your side...” What else is to offer? In order: from what I’ve seen, Bojan has been quiet, Mark Hughes knows what he’s doing, no, and yes. Updated at 2.54pm GMT 2.52pm GMT14:52 63 min Victor Moses has drifted outside his man, and lashes a shot just by the near post. Apparently Spurs are also playing. 2.49pm GMT14:49 GOAL! West Brom 0-2 Newcastle (Coloccini, 61) Alan Pardew is a football genius! A corner is improperly cleared, and recycled to Janmaat, wide on the right. He checks back onto his left foot, then nips back outside and lasers over a cross that beats the last defender - Coloccini has pulled off him - and a downwards header is duly powers past Foster. Simple, clinical and superb. Updated at 2.51pm GMT 2.48pm GMT14:48 58 min Cabella throws a lollipop at Rose and before he even has a chance to buy it, a beautiful cross is outswinging its way towards the back post. But Ameobi is on his heels, failing to gamble, and other assorted cliches, and the opportunity is gone. 2.46pm GMT14:46 56 min Lukaku takes a pass from Eto’o on the left of the box and draws a challenge from Vergini, skipping outside him, and whumping a shot against the outside of the post. 2.45pm GMT14:45 55 min The game is drifting for West Brom, so Alan irvine is making pensive faces on the touchline. It’s a tricky one for him - commit more men forward, and his team will risk being caught on the break but the newly devastating Newcastle. 2.43pm GMT14:43 51 min Bridcutt rolls one back to Pantilimon, neglecting to notice 6”3, 94kg centre-forward Romelu Lukaku lurking in the centre-forward position. He latches onto the ball and is taken right by his touch, heavy enough to entice the keeper off his line. Lukaku should shoot, but opts to try and round him instead, whereupon a go-go-gadget arm extends to poke the sphere to safety. Updated at 2.44pm GMT 2.39pm GMT14:39 48 min “Believe it or not, Ian Walker still has those curtains now,” informs Keith Williams. Majesty. Updated at 2.40pm GMT 2.37pm GMT14:37 47 min Talking of whom, the Mido false dawn was a belter. Am I missing any others? Paul Moran, Andy Turner, Ossie Ardíles, José Dominguez (who played on the winguez), Sergiy Rebrov, Simon Davies, Dean Marney, Helder Postiga, Stéphane Dalmat, Mido, Juande Ramos. Updated at 2.37pm GMT 2.36pm GMT14:36 47 min And he should know! This is the worst Tottenham team I v seen for the last ten years #COYS 2.35pm GMT14:35 46 min We’re off at the Stade de Lit, and almost off at White Hart Lane. 2.34pm GMT14:34 46 min West Brom bring on Gamboa for Pocognoli - this game is running a few minutes ahead of t’other two. 2.32pm GMT14:32 How did Spurs get to here? Realistically, they’re what, five, six players off challenging for the top four, five, six players who’d not be all that keen to sign for them. ah. 2.26pm GMT14:26 Half-time email with Dan Osborn: “Noticed you mention Stuart Nethercott. His Wiki states: ‘Stuart Nethercott is perhaps best remembered for the disproportionate amount of times he featured in the Merlin F.A. Premier League Sticker Book collection for the 1994-95 season. Much to the chagrin of collectors, it was not unknown for a six sticker packet to contain six copies of Nethercott, then in the Tottenham ranks. His sticker became ubiquitous to the point that, in an attempt to rid themselves of a rapidly thickening deck of Nethercotts, school children of the period were known to cover their friends’ lockers as well as their school corridor walls with numerous copies of the Nethercott sticker, earning Stuart Nethercott a degree of fame and notoriety he was unable to attain in his footballing career.’” That is exceptional. As were these curtains. 2.23pm GMT14:23 For the avoidance of doubt: if you’re not impressed with what you’re seeing, call your players all sorts if you fancy. But actually forming mouth into a circle and projecting forth a boo? Ahem. 2.22pm GMT14:22 Booooo! Boooo! Boooooooo! Spurs 0-2 Stoke Adults! Updated at 2.29pm GMT 2.21pm GMT14:21 Which leaves only.... 2.21pm GMT14:21 Half-time: Sunderland 0-0 Everton Apparently, McGeady narrowly missed with a long-ranger a while ago - I missed it too - but this is an interesting game. Sunderland are a real threat with Wickham and Fletcher in the box, while Everton are passing the ball as quickly and perceptively as you’d expect. 2.19pm GMT14:19 45 min We’re still going in the other two games, which explains the jiggered timestamps. Well, that’s what I’m saying. 2.18pm GMT14:18 Half-time: West Brom 0-1 Newcastle That goal was not unlike this goal. 2.16pm GMT14:16 GOAL! West Brom 0-1 Newcastle (Perez 45) And what a goal! Newcastle work the ball from left to right, finding Janmaat in space. Rather than loft a cross, he drills a beauty into the middle, and Perez arrives at precisely the right moment to drag a backflick into the far corner. Obviously Pardew celebrates as though he scored it, more understandably so than usual - it was he who brought in the man who did. Updated at 2.29pm GMT 2.15pm GMT14:15 41 min “This is turning into a group therapy session for Spurs fans. It’s getting me down” says black comedy’s Simon McMahon. “How are the other games going?” Not a whole lot coming to pass at the Hawthorns, Everton dominating at Stadium of Light, but Sunderland a threat on the break and from corners. 2.13pm GMT14:13 39 min “Absolute shocker by Lee Mason,” stomps JR in Illinois. “Jordi Gomez, already on a yellow for a disgusting challenge on Barry just got away with an equally disgusting dive. That has to be another yellow. Truly pathetic refereeing.” I only saw each once - the foul I wasn’t sure was so bad, but the dive was a goodun. 2.11pm GMT14:11 35 min “It’s not really Kaboul we have to worry about,” reckons Peter Crosby, “it’s more why the hell Rose is picked every. single. week. Please for the love of God at least try Ben Davies. Brings back memories of the Justin Edinburgh/Dean Austin dark days...” My teenage years, I love those boys. And Dean Marney, and Scott Houghton, and Andy Turner, and Stuart Nethercott. But I agree - Ben Davies was an excellent signing, odd he’s not getting to play. 2.08pm GMT14:08 33 min “Stoke are dropping like flies but are also buzzing like bees,” says Jeremy Dresner. “The problem is Spurs are playing preposterously ponderously. Maybe one of the quickest most incisive teams on their day when Bale, Walker, Townsend and Lennon all challenged for the clubs’ pacy protagonist title. With this lot not happening for various reasons, Spurs don’t look at the races at all. Team USA’s Yedlin can’t arrive quickly enough.” This really isn’t very good from them - and it’s hard to see how they improve. The kind of players they need aren’t easy to come by or to attract - just ask Brendan Rodgers - so Mauricio Pochettino needs to be given time. 2.06pm GMT14:06 GOAL! Spurs 0-2 Stoke (Walters, 31) Cameron - I think - beats Kane to a header on halfway, and somehow, it finds Diouf, away on the right. He taps over a gentle cross, and Walters punishes a finish past Wales’ Lloris. Updated at 2.17pm GMT 2.04pm GMT14:04 31 min This is close from Sunderland. Reveillere slips in a lovely ball between Distin and Coleman for Gomez, and Fletcher peels away ready for the cut-back - but Gomez fails to notice, Distin able to hump away his straight low cross. 2.02pm GMT14:02 30 min “Answers on the proverbial postcard, please” says one of the summarisers. So, which proverb might that be, then? “A rolling Jersey by night gathers no laughs”? 2.00pm GMT14:00 28 min It’s been several minutes since Sunderland mustered a telling touch of the ball, but then Gomez sways forwards and, just as he arrives at the box, vaults over Jagielka’s leg when he runs into traffic. Another ref might have awarded him a second yellow card. Updated at 2.02pm GMT 1.58pm GMT13:58 27 min “Afternoon Daniel,” chirps Simon McMahon. “I think the only thing I hate more than the ‘they’re a good, honest side / he’s a good, honest pro’ cliche is the ‘they’re a good footballing side / they like to play football’ one. Honest.” I also hate the words “sneakers” and “dude”. 1.57pm GMT13:57 25 min Bad couple of minutes for Stoke - Begovic is booked for timewasting, and Wilson is injured by something or others. Mark Hughes reacts with characteristic levity. 1.53pm GMT13:53 21 min Mason takes aim from 25 yards, scooshing a shot just outside the near post. Updated at 1.54pm GMT 1.51pm GMT13:51 20 min Can someone please reassure me that Federico Fazio’s dressing room nickname is Benny? Thanks. 1.49pm GMT13:49 18 min Terrace classics that never were: Sweetheart ... you’re Tim Krul. Updated at 1.49pm GMT 1.47pm GMT13:47 16 min West Brom are on top at the Hawthorns, and after a sustained spell of possession, Brunt fires one into Anichebe on the edge of the box, almost dead centre. He touches off deftly for Berahino, who drills powerfully but centrally, and Krul is able to tip over - for a corner that comes to nowt. 1.45pm GMT13:45 15 min It’s hard to be sure, watching three games at once, but Spurs have done almost nothing so far. Trusay! 1.45pm GMT13:45 15 min By the way, Darr-on Gibs-on replaced Barry. 1.44pm GMT13:44 13 min “Part of the problem with Kaboul is that, even before the injuries, he was prone to the most appalling lapses of concentration” reckons Enna Cooper, “and, unfortunately, that’s the one part of this game that he has most definitely retained. For all his flaws, Dawson was more our defensive rock than Kaboul was.” Yeah, I see that, but he was a different kind of player. He did have delusions of Beckenbauer, it’s fair to say, but the ability that he had isn’t especially common. 1.42pm GMT13:42 10 min Bad news at Sunderland - Jordi Gomez has left his leg in on Gareth Barry - it didn’t look deliberate, though he’s booked - and Barry is stretchered off, arm over eyes. Updated at 1.58pm GMT 1.41pm GMT13:41 9 min Sammy Ameobi waits for a headed clearance on the edge of the box, lets the ball bounce once, and then controls a really difficult curler onto the bar at the far corner. Great effort, never going in - we know this, because it didn’t. 1.40pm GMT13:40 9 min “Category error,” chides Alec McAulay. “Insects are animals”. 1.38pm GMT13:38 GOAL! Spurs 0-1 Stoke (Bojan, 8) Oh Tottenham! Oh Spurs! Oh Lillywhites! Bojan takes the ball on the left touchline, 30 or so yards from goal, and sets off on a diagonal run as the various defenders do a lot of nothing. Then, when he reaches the edge of the box, he drills a firm but far from unsaveable right footer across Lloris. Updated at 1.49pm GMT 1.37pm GMT13:37 6 min Another corner for Sunderland, aimed at Wickham again, this time at the back post. He’s first to it again, and this time heads only just above the angle. 1.35pm GMT13:35 5 min Townsend wriggles down the right and drills a cross towards the back post. Kane flings himself in its direction, but can’t quite make contact. 1.34pm GMT13:34 4 min Oh, this is lovely. Eto’o snatches possession inside the Sunderland half and dashes a pass into Lukaku, who lays off to meet his run. The pair then exchange a further pair of passes, by which time Eto’o is in the box, where he opens his body and curls an effort just wide. 1.33pm GMT13:33 3 min Sunderland win a corner down the left, whipped into the near post, where Wickham leaps unaccompanied, flicking towards the far post, where Fletchert can’t quite keep up with it, so it goes wide. 1.32pm GMT13:32 1 min “Hi Mr Harris,” begins Dan Osborn. “I’ve been creating my top Premier League football 11 of players with animal-like names. In goal I’ve got Bernard Lama (llama). Across the back I’ve got Mark Fish, Darren Peacock, Hayden Foxe and Razvan Rat. David Batty, (bat), would play as a holding midfielder with the legendary Steve Froggatt on one flank and the mercurial Nicky Summerbee, (bee), on the other. I realise a bee is in fact an insect but he’s in the team for now. I’m playing three up front. Geoff Horsefield, Steve Bull and Shaun Goater to get me the goals.I challenge anyone to beat my EPL team of players with animal, (and insect!), related names.” Tangentially, I recall Robbie Savage identifying Horsefield as the hardest player he’d ever known, beating Roy Keane in the final following a knock-out competition. 1.30pm GMT13:30 And we’re off, all over. 1.29pm GMT13:29 The grounds all remember. 1.25pm GMT13:25 At the Hawthorns, the players are in the tunnel. “Come on”, holler various. 1.16pm GMT13:16 “Somewhere, Younis Kaboul has some photographs of Daniel Levy thata: guarantee his place in the Spurs Defenceb: I really don’t want to see”, emails John Tumbridge. It’s a shame, how it’s gone for him - he had something, well though he knew it, but hasn’t relocated it since his injury. 1.13pm GMT13:13 “A lot of honesty” is what Alan Pardew reckons we’ll see from his team today. He is virtue - but what others would you like to see from your sides? 1.09pm GMT13:09 More teams: Sunderland (4-4-2ish): Pantilimon; Vergini, Brown, O’Shea, Reveillere; Gomez, Bridcutt, Larsson, Johnson; Wickham, Fletcher. Subs: Rodwell, Altidore, Mavrias, Graham, Mannone, Buckley, Robson. Everton (4-2-3-1, natch): Howard; Coleman, Jagielka, Distin, Baines; McCarthy, Barry; Barkley, Eto’o, McGeady; Lukaku. Subs: Robles, Hibbert, Gibson, Naismith, Besic, Atsu, Osman. Which means three changes for Sunderland - out go Van Aanholt, Cattermole (suspended) and Buckley, with Brown, Bridcutt and Johnson returning. Everton swap Alcaraz for Distin, and Naismith for Lukaku. Updated at 1.24pm GMT 1.00pm GMT13:00 More teams: Tottenham (The Tottenham Way): Lloris; Naughton, Fazio, Kaboul, Rose; Capoue, Mason; Chadli, Eriksen, Townsend; Kane. Subs: Vertonghen, Soldado, Adebayor, Lamela, Vorm, Dier, Dembele. Stoke (4-3-3, possibly): Begovic; Bardsley, Shawcross, Wilson, Pieters; Walters, Sidwell, Nzonzi; Bojan, Diouf, Moses. Subs: Muniesa, Ireland, Arnautovic, Adam, Cameron, Crouch, Sorensen. So, there we go: Harry Kane earns his first start, at the expense of Emmanuel Adebayor, while Jan Vertonghen and Roberto Soldado also drop out, Federico Fazio and Andros Townsend coming in. For Stoke, Phil Bardsley replaces Geoff Cameron. 12.51pm GMT12:51 Apropos of Victor Anichebe, what a goal this is. Outta my way! 12.46pm GMT12:46 Let’s have some teams. West Brom (4-4-2, obviously): Foster, Wisdom, Lescott, Dawson, Pocognoli; Brunt, Dorrans, Mulumbu, Morrison; Anichebe, Berahino. Subs: Baird, Yacob, Myhill, Gamboa, McAuley, Sessegnon, Samaras Newcastle (something far beyond the grasp of the likes of us): Krul; Janmaat, Coloccini, Dummett, Haidara; Sissoko, Abeid, Colback; Cabella, Perez, Ameobi. Subs: Taylor, Williamson, Anita, Cisse, Gouffran, Elliot, Armstrong. So, West Brom replace Gardner with Mulumbu and Sessegnon with Anichebe, while for Newcastle, Taylor and Perez come in for Taylor and Perez. Updated at 1.52pm GMT 12.30pm GMT12:30 Preamble There’s been a lot of patter over the years about leagues within leagues and this and that, but these days, things are very different. The hallucinogenic amount of telly money in circulation means that England clubs of all descriptions can snatch players from Abroad, which means that, even though the top teams aren’t all that, those beneath them are better than ever before. Take this afternoon, for example: Arsenal are fifth in the league and have 18 points, while Sunderland are 15th in the league and have 11. Both, along with six others in between, will shortly tussle for our pleasure. Good! To begin with, we have: Sunderland v Everton Tottenham v Stoke West Brom v Newcastle Good luck picking the outcomes of that lot. Kick-offs: 1.30pm Updated at 12.30pm GMT |