Tallulah Wilson inquest: teenager hit by train kept diary of self-loathing

http://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2014/jan/14/tallulah-wilson-inquest-teenager-hit-train-diary

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A dancer who died after being hit by a train described herself as fat, ugly and worthless in her private diary and other writings, an inquest has heard.

A diary found by transport police after the death of Tallulah Wilson, 15, showed her to have written on one page "I am fat" and on another "What am I? You are nothing" while a third just repeated the word fat.

In a separate document, the teenager had repeatedly written the word worthless, followed by a page with ugly written in large black letters, St Pancras coroner's court in London heard.

Addressing the jury at the inquest, Mary Hassell, senior coroner for inner-London north, said: "I presume you will have seen a photograph of Tallullah – a very lovely looking young woman."

The diary entries were revealed after the court heard on Monday that Tallulah had become so obsessed by the internet that she had created a fantasy cocaine-taking character in order to escape reality.

The court also heard how the teenager, who died after being hit by a train at St Pancras station on 14 October 2012, would go online and post pictures of herself with self-inflicted cuts.

Detective Sergeant Adrian Naylor, of the British Transport police, said materials including computers, diaries and a journal had been taken from her home as part of that investigation into her death.

He told the hearing there were disturbing writings relating to self-harm and self-loathing in a journal that was taken from the house. One picture of self-inflicted injury on a computer had been captioned "my arm", he said.

Asked by Hassell if there had been any particular trigger for Tallulah's actions, he said: "There is no specific trigger, it is a culmination of what appears to be relationship breakdown with people on the internet, concerns about self-appearance and basically engaging with people with like-minded people who seemed to feed that obsession."

The inquest continues.