I’m like *WTAF face* Dave? He’s like, the last lefty has left the Today prog

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/jul/10/mrs-cameron-diary-sunday-trading

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Well people keep going God what marv news about Sundays, I’m like, IKR, you have no idea how much time we wasted with Cleggsy, literally there were barely enough hours in the day for Dave to play tennis & watch Elwen’s football & cook lunch & plait everyone’s hair & squeeze in a walk & go to the pub & find Nancy & eat lunch & have a nap & check everybody’s homework & have tea before it was already time for his run, then we had to leave for London & there was only time to fit in Game of Thrones & Minecraft because Dave is such a brilliant multi-tasker, then it was work work work work all over again, Nancy would be like remind me Dad, it’s Keep Sunday Special amirite?

Related: Budget 2015: George Osborne to shake up Sunday trading laws

So now Dave can get his training & gaming & praying & stuff done in the week, plus I said to Mummy do not tell anybody but maybe there could *even* be time for some hunting, actually do you think it might be possible to have too many date nights, she’s like, darling that is the whole point of the Garrick. I’m like, it is not just us, Govey has started a paralegal distance learning course & IDS is building a scale model of a traditional jobcentre out of matchsticks, right down to these darling tiny jobseekers, you should see the pleasure on his dear old face when he thinks he is doing something useful?

Mummy’s like, well, do thank dear Oik & tell him everyone at Screw Your Sunday is beyond thrilled, there is a complimentary armorial bin waiting for him if he or Frances would like to call by at the shop, our new Sunday hours are 6am until midnight, browsing from 4am if we can get the staff. I’m like *WTAF face* Dave? I’m like please, tell Oik to stop, nobody cares more about upscale accessories than me but even I do not want to sell them on Sunday, why are you laughing? He’s like, only because Labour is dead, the euro is dead, the BBC is on its knees, Jeremy Corbyn is working for us 24/7, literally the only thing that would make it perfect is the last lefty leaving the Today programme, I’m like who, he’s like the Scotch one, I’m like, wait a second :))))))

As seen by Catherine Bennett