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You can find the current article at its original source at https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2020/feb/21/hell-weddings-michigan-free-leap-day-offer
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| Version 1 | Version 2 |
|---|---|
| Go to Hell: town offers free weddings but anniversaries will be a problem | Go to Hell: town offers free weddings but anniversaries will be a problem |
| (about 1 hour later) | |
| Hell, Michigan is offering a limited-time marriage deal: 29 free weddings on leap day, 29 February, at 2.29pm | Hell, Michigan is offering a limited-time marriage deal: 29 free weddings on leap day, 29 February, at 2.29pm |
| I have heard it said there’s no point in going to heaven, because all the cool people will be in hell. I now know this is probably not true – because not everyone would fit: Hell is a tiny town with a population of only 70 people in Michigan. | I have heard it said there’s no point in going to heaven, because all the cool people will be in hell. I now know this is probably not true – because not everyone would fit: Hell is a tiny town with a population of only 70 people in Michigan. |
| It’s also a place where you can get married for free. Which sounds like a good deal, since the the popular Netflix movie Marriage Story makes marriage seem like the seventh circle of Dante’s inferno. It’s a wonder anyone still pays for the privilege. | It’s also a place where you can get married for free. Which sounds like a good deal, since the the popular Netflix movie Marriage Story makes marriage seem like the seventh circle of Dante’s inferno. It’s a wonder anyone still pays for the privilege. |
| Next week, on 29 February at 2.29pm, 29 free weddings are up for grabs for anyone who fancies getting married in Hell. It’s a leap day, so they’ll only have an anniversary every four years – but maybe the presents will be better. | Next week, on 29 February at 2.29pm, 29 free weddings are up for grabs for anyone who fancies getting married in Hell. It’s a leap day, so they’ll only have an anniversary every four years – but maybe the presents will be better. |
| Where do we sign up? There’s actually a process for that – one just needs to text the officiating reverend with their full name, address and confirmation they have secured a valid marriage license – according to the Detroit Free Press. | Where do we sign up? There’s actually a process for that – one just needs to text the officiating reverend with their full name, address and confirmation they have secured a valid marriage license – according to the Detroit Free Press. |
| The Rev Yvonne Williams, who will officiate the ceremony next week, has a positive outlook on the whole affair. “When you get married in Hell, there’s nowhere for your marriage to go but up,” she says. There is, in fact, a 40% chance it will end in divorce – so I guess she hit the nail on the head. | The Rev Yvonne Williams, who will officiate the ceremony next week, has a positive outlook on the whole affair. “When you get married in Hell, there’s nowhere for your marriage to go but up,” she says. There is, in fact, a 40% chance it will end in divorce – so I guess she hit the nail on the head. |
| It’s not the first time Hell has been in the news. In 2017, one-time mayor and one-time owner of Hell (more on that later) Elijah Daniel declared heterosexuality illegal in the town. Which is infuriating – feeling constantly seen and heard can be exhausting enough as it is for straight person, OK? – but also, Hell looks like a pretty fun place to live. | It’s not the first time Hell has been in the news. In 2017, one-time mayor and one-time owner of Hell (more on that later) Elijah Daniel declared heterosexuality illegal in the town. Which is infuriating – feeling constantly seen and heard can be exhausting enough as it is for straight person, OK? – but also, Hell looks like a pretty fun place to live. |
| Daniel paid town organizers to make him the mayor of Hell in 2017; he was impeached shortly after the stunt. Which, if today’s politics is anything to go by, means nothing anyway – all hail Mayor Daniel of the town of Hell! | |
| Daniel came back two years later and bought the town – anyone can become owner of Hell (for a limited amount of time) by going on its website and paying a fee. He renamed it Gay Hell and said only pride flags could fly there after the Trump administration banned embassies flying pride flags. | Daniel came back two years later and bought the town – anyone can become owner of Hell (for a limited amount of time) by going on its website and paying a fee. He renamed it Gay Hell and said only pride flags could fly there after the Trump administration banned embassies flying pride flags. |
| So, you might call Trump and Daniel a match made in Hell. Needless to say, I don’t expect to see the two married any time soon. | So, you might call Trump and Daniel a match made in Hell. Needless to say, I don’t expect to see the two married any time soon. |
| Anyway, the temperature is currently below zero in Hell, so if you’ve been thinking for a while, “Yeah, right, I’ll marry that guy, when Hell freezes over” now just might be your time. | Anyway, the temperature is currently below zero in Hell, so if you’ve been thinking for a while, “Yeah, right, I’ll marry that guy, when Hell freezes over” now just might be your time. |